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American would love advice re:moving to England

American would love advice re:moving to England

Old Apr 24th 2012, 8:19 pm
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Default Re: American would love advice re:moving to England

Hello! I don't think anyone is helping you by telling you to do it or not to do it, as no one can know all of your facts, circumstances, and thinking. That said, my help, as someone who has done what you are asking for advice about is this: 1) Plan in advance! 2) First, you need the proper entry visa, or citizenship rights. You can't just enter as more than a visitor, or enter as a visitor, with immigration intent. 3) You want to bring your dog? Did you know that it is safest to book your dog on the Cunard Queen Mary out of New York to Southampton, but there are only 12 kennels on boats with kennels, and they are booked often over a year in advance. Airlines force animals to come in CARGO and this can be dangerous or at least traumatic mentally and physically for the pet, so I've been warned, and I won't risk my pets health! 4) You could start off as a renter in a furnished apartment, and that way, your adjustment can be easier, and you can reverse your decision as well. Sometimes "holiday homes" can be found that lease out for terms--be careful for rents raised in off season and lease terms shortened, and go over the inventory with a fine-tooth comb! 5) When you do arrive, you may be able to join various groups or when work authorized, find "just a job," to help you get out and meet people and put some balance into your schedule even if you don't really need that job. GOOD LUCK and you can always GO BACK but you can't always GO FOR IT! : ) Don't listen to naysayers, it's your life, and worst case scenario, it doesn't work out!
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Old Apr 24th 2012, 8:32 pm
  #152  
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Default Re: American would love advice re:moving to England

Originally Posted by ElaineUSAUK
Don't listen to naysayers, it's your life, and worst case scenario, it doesn't work out!
I don't think anyone has told the OP 'don't come'. Sometimes perceived naysayers are trying to help; the worst case scenario is actually that someones spends a lot of time and money doing something that eventually makes them unhappy, a long long way from home and support.
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Old Apr 24th 2012, 8:52 pm
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Default Re: American would love advice re:moving to England

Originally Posted by MoshiMoshi
I don't think anyone has told the OP 'don't come'. Sometimes perceived naysayers are trying to help; the worst case scenario is actually that someones spends a lot of time and money doing something that eventually makes them unhappy, a long long way from home and support.
So Moshi, Moshi, Would you tell the OP not to MARRY someone because he or she might eventually spend lots of time and money doing something that eventually makes them unhappy, and possibly away from home and support? I don't think that's for you to decide. When I talked about "don't come," why don't you think of that as "Suburban Road," and that often people in general may discourage someone from doing something that is a huge move. Also, I honestly believe that in part, we can make our own happiness, learn, and become a stronger person by a challenge. You have warned her though, there you go, she could be out time and money, and could be unhappy. Well, you could not try it, and say, what if forever too. People go into careers, relationships, businesses, and they can end up losing time, money and dreams can turn into nightmares. I still advocate better to spend a day as a tiger, than a lifetime as a sheep. I do not want to engage in a hostile dialog with YOU, so if you wish to escalate the posts to such, I'm not responding. (Had enough for decades of that). I'm only here, to offer information that I hope could be helpful to someone asking for that.
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Old Apr 24th 2012, 9:29 pm
  #154  
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Default Re: American would love advice re:moving to England

Originally Posted by ElaineUSAUK
So Moshi, Moshi, Would you tell the OP not to MARRY someone because he or she might eventually spend lots of time and money doing something that eventually makes them unhappy, and possibly away from home and support? I don't think that's for you to decide.
If the OP had never met the guy, then, yes -- my advice would be not to marry him.

The OP started this thread asking for feedback. We're all perfectly entitled to give advice as we see fit. I'm giving my opinion based on having been an expat in three countries, as well as being a Brit who knew many Americans in England. I have no vested interest in discouraging people from big moves and changes.

I think 'better a day as a tiger than a lifetime as a sheep' is entirely admirable philosophy. But I also believe in 'look before you leap'. And when I ask for advice about moving overseas, I'd actually prefer specific info rather than 'go for it', which is just meaningless validation.

Originally Posted by ElaineUSAUK
I do not want to engage in a hostile dialog with YOU, so if you wish to escalate the posts to such, I'm not responding.
I think that's a really rude thing to say, as was your 'so, Moshi Moshi' introduction and your exaggerated portrayal of my opinion. Neither of us has even met the OP, and -- again -- we're both entitled to our own opinions. Please feel free not to respond.
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Old Apr 24th 2012, 10:21 pm
  #155  
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Default Re: American would love advice re:moving to England

Originally Posted by ElaineUSAUK
So Moshi, Moshi, Would you tell the OP not to MARRY someone because he or she might eventually spend lots of time and money doing something that eventually makes them unhappy, and possibly away from home and support? I don't think that's for you to decide. When I talked about "don't come," why don't you think of that as "Suburban Road," and that often people in general may discourage someone from doing something that is a huge move. Also, I honestly believe that in part, we can make our own happiness, learn, and become a stronger person by a challenge. You have warned her though, there you go, she could be out time and money, and could be unhappy. Well, you could not try it, and say, what if forever too. People go into careers, relationships, businesses, and they can end up losing time, money and dreams can turn into nightmares. I still advocate better to spend a day as a tiger, than a lifetime as a sheep. I do not want to engage in a hostile dialog with YOU, so if you wish to escalate the posts to such, I'm not responding. (Had enough for decades of that). I'm only here, to offer information that I hope could be helpful to someone asking for that.
It's very easy to tell people to 'go for it'. Will you be around to help if it doesn't work out for her?
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Old Apr 24th 2012, 10:53 pm
  #156  
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Default Re: American would love advice re:moving to England

Originally Posted by Sally Redux
It's very easy to tell people to 'go for it'. Will you be around to help if it doesn't work out for her?
YES I WOULD SALLY! I helped hundreds of refugees, asylees, and family immigrants over the last two decades. I did tell her to plan, prepare the immigration rights, and consider a furnished rental property and that she could return home. If she would like to ask for further information or tips, I will be here for her, and I would actually travel (work permitting) to where she would be trying to settle to help her if she needed it, would you go the extra thousands of miles or just write a post?
I did not intend to engage in a debate with other posters, I meant that others, not posters would discourage her in general, and I do agree that a vacation or exploratory trip first is a good idea, and a pros and cons list. Very few people even CAN contemplate a move like this for a host of reasons. It is not for the timid either, it takes a lot. CHEERS.
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Old Apr 25th 2012, 7:21 am
  #157  
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Default Re: American would love advice re:moving to England

Originally Posted by sile

Sally, thanks for your thoughtful response and ideas. Although it sounds like a good idea in some ways, I would like to choose a place to rent for 6 months or so and travel out from there. Right now, I feel very discouraged and wonder if I should do this at all.
Honestly, you know I was rooting for you to just go for it, but if these very mildly cautionary posts are enough to discourage you, I'm not sure you should.

As others have said, moving abroad is tough. Many of your first days will be discouraging. You have to be OK with that or it won't work.

And as for settling in one place right away - I'm not sure that's a good idea when you haven't even visited. The place you choose will color your whole experience of the UK - if it's the wrong one, you could have an unhappy 6 months.
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Old Apr 25th 2012, 5:41 pm
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Default Re: American would love advice re:moving to England

Originally Posted by sallysimmons
Honestly, you know I was rooting for you to just go for it, but if these very mildly cautionary posts are enough to discourage you, I'm not sure you should.As others have said, moving abroad is tough. Many of your first days will be discouraging. You have to be OK with that or it won't work And as for settling in one place right away - I'm not sure that's a good idea when you haven't even visited. The place you choose will color your whole experience of the UK - if it's the wrong one, you could have an unhappy 6 months.
.
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Old Apr 25th 2012, 6:01 pm
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Default Re: American would love advice re:moving to England

Originally Posted by ElaineUSAUK
.
I've thought about it, and yes, I think OP/SILE wishing for advice, should definitely first come on a short-term visit, and maybe tour, talk to Citizen's Advice Bureau representatives, explore options (there are "ramblers," walking groups), etc. for your interests. In my immigration and emigration administrative work, (and some flew through in just weeks, others if complicated could take forever), I have to say that part of my perspective has been helping people who already were absolutely determined to relocate and needed and depended on help from others for a number of things.
Sile/OP, here, doesn't have to go, and hasn't lived abroad, so thinking about this from a different perspective than someone hard set on this, even who hadn't maybe living somewhere first, why not rent the month-to-month three or six-month term "holiday home," and explore options from there. The UK is diverse as others have mentioned, Wales, Scotland, towns from Brighton/Hove to Cornwall (6-7 hours from London), and incredible scenery. It does take incredible courage and strength, and some days will be lonely and you have to make quite an effort to create a network for social and support if you don't have the incoming connections. I've heard a lot of stories about places all over the US and the World where people visit on a vacation, and then move there, and end up moving home, or they think they want to retire somewhere, buy a place, and end up wanting to return, still others keep two places. There also is the fact that a US Citizen or unrelinquished Lawful Permanent Resident always owes US TAXES on their world-wide income, but often your accountant can work with you on it or find you a referral. There are also tax treaties on some points. There are so many challenges, but it can also be a huge joy to overcome each one. Such as: I now have my National Insurance Number today, and a job, and my NHS number, and my provisional driver's license, and my bills all gathered and bookmarked-- but these would be things you have to manage only if you actually decided to move and not merely an exploratory trip.
What really made me rethink all this was the difference between advise and help after someone already did it which the later was what I usually have been called to do. I thought about a woman who wanted advice about divorcing someone under given facts, and I advised her she should, and my sister-in-law advised her under no circumstances should she do so. The result was that she didn't divorce, had children, and the spouse turned out to be a super-rat, and the woman was in a nasty divorce and had thrown away over a decade, and will have to face the next two decades, instead of possibly having met someone else while still very young and single. We never regret our wonderful children (I should hope), but this was a tough one. My sister-in-law felt enormous guilt for her role in this as an advisor. This is just one example.
So, don't give up, but don't jump in, just go on this trip with your eyes wide open, and as one other poster stated, don't be shocked about people having a few drinks in the pub! Cheers, E
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Old Apr 25th 2012, 6:11 pm
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Default Re: American would love advice re:moving to England

I have read all the queries and many of the responses. Although I would side with those recommending a visit, there is also a time in life when one can/should simply jump in the deep end. It's not as though it's irreversible; you can always return. All the very best - carpe diem!
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Old Apr 25th 2012, 6:32 pm
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Default Re: American would love advice re:moving to England

Hello everyone,
First I want to say that I truly appreciate all of your posts - every one of them. You are all really thinking a lot about this and it is very, very helpful to me in this process, even if I have felt a little discouraged by some of what has been said.
Last night after reading and thinking more about it, I came to a few decisions. The most important one is that I am not going to go there with the idea of staying until I have my Irish citizenship and passport in hand. That part of this has been the most challenging. I have been trying to figure out how I could stay past the 6 months visitor time frame whilst waiting for my Irish citizenship. That is very complicated and I do not want to be going back and forth from one place to another or trying to convince Immigration people to let me stay. Also, there is the issue of health care coverage over there if I am just a visitor. It is all too complicated the way I was going to try to do it. So, when I go, I want to have the right to live there and get NHS coverage and do it all with as little stress as possible.
And based on so many suggestions, I am tending towards the idea of visiting first. It probably is the sensible thing to do. I really do not want to make the decision to move all that way alone based on what I THINK it will be like. But I may wait until I get my citizenship and bring my dog for an extended vacation and if I love it, I can just stay. (Correct me if I am wrong on this please.) I will do it when I am ready to move out of my house here, store my stuff and then send for it if I decide to stay.
So, that's what I have decided. But I am sure I will continue to have questions about all aspects of this.

Last edited by sile; Apr 25th 2012 at 6:44 pm. Reason: Addition
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Old Apr 25th 2012, 6:53 pm
  #162  
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Default Re: American would love advice re:moving to England

Originally Posted by sile
Hello everyone,
First I want to say that I truly appreciate all of your posts - every one of them. You are all really thinking a lot about this and it is very, very helpful to me in this process, even if I have felt a little discouraged by some of what has been said.
Last night after reading and thinking more about it, I came to a few decisions. The most important one is that I am not going to go there with the idea of staying until I have my Irish citizenship and passport in hand. That part of this has been the most challenging. I have been trying to figure out how I could stay past the 6 months visitor time frame whilst waiting for my Irish citizenship. That is very complicated and I do not want to be going back and forth from one place to another or trying to convince Immigration people to let me stay. Also, there is the issue of health care coverage over there if I am just a visitor. It is all too complicated the way I was going to try to do it. So, when I go, I want to have the right to live there and get NHS coverage and do it all with as little stress as possible.
And based on so many suggestions, I am tending towards the idea of visiting first. It probably is the sensible thing to do. I really do not want to make the decision to move all that way alone based on what I THINK it will be like. But I may wait until I get my citizenship and bring my dog for an extended vacation and if I love it, I can just stay. (Correct me if I am wrong on this please.) I will do it when I am ready to move out of my house here, store my stuff and then send for it if I decide to stay.
So, that's what I have decided. But I am sure I will continue to have questions about all aspects of this.
I think that sounds like a sensible plan. Keep us posted!
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Old Apr 25th 2012, 7:18 pm
  #163  
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Default Re: American would love advice re:moving to England

Be aware that pets need to be quarantined for some months when you arrive in the UK. I'm not sure if you can get around this by getting an animal passport with all the necessary shots listed.
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Old Apr 25th 2012, 7:25 pm
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Default Re: American would love advice re:moving to England

Originally Posted by Sandra1
Be aware that pets need to be quarantined for some months when you arrive in the UK. I'm not sure if you can get around this by getting an animal passport with all the necessary shots listed.
The DEFRA rules changed back at the beginning of this year. There's a sticky thread about it. It'a lot simpler and less time-consuming now, and quarantine can easily be avoided.
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Old Apr 25th 2012, 7:54 pm
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Default Re: American would love advice re:moving to England

Originally Posted by Rusty Chainsaw
The DEFRA rules changed back at the beginning of this year. There's a sticky thread about it. It'a lot simpler and less time-consuming now, and quarantine can easily be avoided.
The instructions and advice currently for U.S., were that there would not be a quarantine, but there is a required pet-passport, and this includes proof of all the shots and treatments. If brought via the Cunard Queen Mary 2, for example, the documents have been provided by them for passenger-owner completion, and if needed, pre-voyage, one can be referred to Veterinarians in New York who are familiar with the paperwork. The pet transport and quarantine requirements vary by country of origin.
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