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Young kids... Reflecting parental behaviours

Young kids... Reflecting parental behaviours

Old Mar 25th 2012, 5:37 pm
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Default Young kids... Reflecting parental behaviours

Was in the park earlier... Whilst I regretted having tried to walk round the bloody thing again... So sat and watched some young kids... Until I could get hold of HIM to pick me up in the car....


Havent watched children that age for a while... But it was funny... The behaviours, attitudes, interactions.... And how the parents attitudes/behaviours influence them so much....

The mumsie mummy with the clingy one.... The NFR smoking a winnie blue and her darling plunging from one social interactive disaster to another... The happy chatters with the kids that were happy chatters too...the Screamer whose kid was a screamer.....

Something you dont notice when you're "going through" it... How you behave/feel/interact affects them DIRECTLY and the link is just SO more direct/obvious when they are little... ..... They mirror/reflect their parents so closely in some cases its scarey... Always urred a bit on the nature vs nuture side of the debate... But now not so sure

Just a random observation
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Old Mar 25th 2012, 10:12 pm
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Default Re: Young kids... Reflecting parental behaviours

It is true to a great extent. Working at a preschool you could see the twitchy kids had twitchy parents, the shy ones had one parent who was also reticent, and the loudmouths had yobbish kids. But sometimes the parents were both really lovely and their child was not. They are the ones to watch out for, as it often means hidden problems which only really emerge later. Had one child who had autistic tendencies, and looking at the parents you would never know, but on digging deeper, the father had some OCD traits and very focussed in conversation/social interactions. Child was later diagnosed with Aspergers. I think the father had it too, but it had never been recognised. (Mum was lovely and father polite, so you'd never know on a brief meeting.)

My personal belief is that genetics has a lot to do with it, but parental input can add to or dampen the effect.
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Old Mar 25th 2012, 11:49 pm
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Default Re: Young kids... Reflecting parental behaviours

Originally Posted by carolinephillips
It is true to a great extent. Working at a preschool you could see the twitchy kids had twitchy parents, the shy ones had one parent who was also reticent, and the loudmouths had yobbish kids. But sometimes the parents were both really lovely and their child was not. They are the ones to watch out for, as it often means hidden problems which only really emerge later. Had one child who had autistic tendencies, and looking at the parents you would never know, but on digging deeper, the father had some OCD traits and very focussed in conversation/social interactions. Child was later diagnosed with Aspergers. I think the father had it too, but it had never been recognised. (Mum was lovely and father polite, so you'd never know on a brief meeting.)

My personal belief is that genetics has a lot to do with it, but parental input can add to or dampen the effect.
Having got four of the buggers... All with VERY different personalities... I honestly believed there was more nature than nurture... But then, when you think where me and HIM were financially, emotionally, work wise in our lives depending on where they were placed in the family ...some things add up ...
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Old Mar 26th 2012, 12:05 am
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Default Re: Young kids... Reflecting parental behaviours

As a parent, I always informed school of stuff going on at home that may effect them at school...... When I was proper sick... Both schools had regular updates... Not because I'm a drama queen, but because the kids were going through a lot..... And it might effect theirq behaviour/concentration/ they might need to talk....

Same with other situations... great Grandparents dying (both kevin and george were very close and would spend a lot of the weekends with them..as well as seeing them during all school holidays and during the week..)

.. They were very active and my grandfather had unresolved issues relating to missing out on his only child for his first 6 years because he was away at war.... Never forgave the government for that... he lost brothers and friends and saw atrocious sights... But He focused on them taking away his time with his son during the most important years of hislife) ....but was able to make it up some what with our eldest two, as we were so close and we lived so nearby)

When they grey nomads come. We let school know... Usually at the primary they have all left the Head would suggest having a couple of days off when they first arrived.... I suppose dealing with so many pommie immigrants they see the effect of an arriving close relative on a child?

When I worked away from home mon-fri for 6 months chasing the funding for my nurse practitioner course and it wasnt practical to move the whole family...

Major stuff.... Not the.. Me and HIM had a slanging match last night stuff...

Wonder whether that was because my mother being a teacher always stressed the importance of home on school?

Do people still do this nowadays???
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Old Mar 26th 2012, 6:07 am
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Default Re: Young kids... Reflecting parental behaviours

We try to encourage parents to tell us what is going on, even if it seems trivial, as it can have a big effect on a 3 year old.

OOps, that should be in the past tense now I'm a lady of "leisure".
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Old Mar 26th 2012, 6:15 am
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Default Re: Young kids... Reflecting parental behaviours

Originally Posted by carolinephillips
We try to encourage parents to tell us what is going on, even if it seems trivial, as it can have a big effect on a 3 year old.

OOps, that should be in the past tense now I'm a lady of "leisure".
Rather than describing yourself as "a lady of leisure" Why not try "a lady of pleasure" instead...

Self fulfilling prophecies and living up to labels and all that stuff... Might just work!
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Old Mar 26th 2012, 9:09 pm
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Default Re: Young kids... Reflecting parental behaviours

My OH would get the wrong idea.
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