[moneypenny20]

Originally Posted by shafanm There is no place like home. I think may brits go to OZ for the wheather and adventure, and after sometime you realize there is nothing much here, unless you had a hopless living situation in UK. Quite a lot of my friend who setteled in OZ in the 90's are returning back to base. they reason they say is lack of sence of belonging.

No it's a totally personal thing. I had a great life in the UK and have a great life here. There is plenty for me and mine to do just as there was in the UK. I belong here just as much as I belonged in the UK.

[bluekipper]

I think new migrants put an enormous amount of pressure on themselves to settle immediately in their new country,, it just cannot happen, you spent yrs in the country you were born in and it could take yrs to make your new country home also. The best advice is one day at a time,, were always busy looking at the past & the future, never living in the now!!!!

Bluekipper

[Syedney]

Originally Posted by shafanm There is no place like home. I think may brits go to OZ for the wheather and adventure, and after sometime you realize there is nothing much here, unless you had a hopless living situation in UK. Quite a lot of my friend who setteled in OZ in the 90's are returning back to base. they reason they say is lack of sence of belonging.

I can't speak for your friends, but I know that, although being away from my UK comfort zone makes things hard, it would be something that I'd regret in my later years if I don't attempt to live here as this was my dream after all...In fact, it happens to be my OH's dream too...

So, although I may return back to UK one day, I want to go back after I have fairly given Australia a chance to make it.

I agree that sense of belonging is important, but , like many have said it here, it takes time...I have to bow to that fact. Can't do anything about it. It just takes time...Like someone esle said it rightly here: had I moved to another part of UK, and not Australia, it would still be hard...

But we should always pursue our dreams and not have regrets of not trying...That would be worse.

[mindblower]

QUOTE]

Wise words them Moneypen.

[Syedney]

Originally Posted by moneypen20 No it's a totally personal thing. I had a great life in the UK and have a great life here. There is plenty for me and mine to do just as there was in the UK. I belong here just as much as I belonged in the UK.

Can concur the same here: we had an extremely good life in UK. Good property with huge garden, nice neighbours, in a nice close, my child would play with other children in the close. Our best friends walking distance away. Our local pub with family garden located mid distance between as and all our friends, little one' school 10 minute walk distance away, and we had bus connection to everywhere (we also had a car too!) and everything else...

There is no reason why it can't be the same here, given time...

[Brisben]

Originally Posted by Hutch It usually takes a long time to put down roots and start feeling some sense of belonging. Don't beat yourself up about missing the old familiar UK, but similarly don't constantly question why you don't feel at home. Give it some time, try to stop focusing on belonging and before you know it - you will.

Agree, been here 20 months, just feeling like home now, but sometimes I miss the UK, but it gets easier, don't want to regret not giving it a fair go.

Get out there do stuff, meet people and embrace what Australia has to offer.
It is a contrast to the UK, but I believe for us it offers the things we want in most aspects.

I hope you feel the same way soon !

[stm1971]

[quote=Syedney;7311450]Can concur the same here: we had an extremely good life in UK. Good property with huge garden, nice neighbours, in a nice close, my child would play with other children in the close. Our best friends walking distance away. Our local pub with family garden located mid distance between as and all our friends, little one' school 10 minute walk distance away, and we had bus connection to everywhere (we also had a car too!) and everything else...

There is no reason why it can't be the same here, given time...[/QUOTE]


That's what I always thought too. We had a good life in England similar to what you describe but after nearly 10 years though it just hasn't happened here and I'm tired of waiting. We do have good friends here, amenites near by and I have "settled" but it still doesn't feel like home to me and it never will.

[ducko]

[quote=stm1971;7312224]

Originally Posted by Syedney Can concur the same here: we had an extremely good life in UK. Good property with huge garden, nice neighbours, in a nice close, my child would play with other children in the close. Our best friends walking distance away. Our local pub with family garden located mid distance between as and all our friends, little one' school 10 minute walk distance away, and we had bus connection to everywhere (we also had a car too!) and everything else... There is no reason why it can't be the same here, given time...[/QUOTE] That's what I always thought too. We had a good life in England similar to what you describe but after nearly 10 years though it just hasn't happened here and I'm tired of waiting. We do have good friends here, amenites near by and I have "settled" but it still doesn't feel like home to me and it never will.

And after 10 years you're right. But that's you. Everybody is different. For some it's not the right move, yet for others it's the perfect fit. Some people may know after 3 months but for most it takes longer. I enjoy living in both countries & for the last decade have been fortunate to flit between both. I work in finance, so that luxury is probably about to end.

[Syedney]

[quote=ducko;7312291]

Originally Posted by stm1971 And after 10 years you're right. But that's you. Everybody is different. For some it's not the right move, yet for others it's the perfect fit. Some people may know after 3 months but for most it takes longer. I enjoy living in both countries & for the last decade have been fortunate to flit between both. I work in finance, so that luxury is probably about to end.

One of the things that most annoy me about here is the 12 hours time diff with UK!!!!

[djr]

I am so pleased I read this! We are only just beginning to think about moving to Oz and haven't even visited yet. I can't even begin to imagine how it feels to be so far away from what I call home (I live in England).

Living in Oz has been a dream of mine for 10 years and my husband is only just coming around to the idea. Now we have discovered his accountancy qualifications are only partially recognised over there so he has potentially more study to do which he is not a happy camper about!

I can imagine though that the first 3-6 months would be really hard as others have said before, you would have been so busy with arrangements and finally getting there and sorting what you need to over there that once things start to settle down all of a sudden the aspects of everyday life kick in. You are living your life but in a different place so it is bound to feel really strange. We moved house 3 years ago and it was only 13 miles from our old house but we had to make friends in this town and settle the kids in at school still. I feel more at home here than I have anywhere and we lived in our old house for 7 years. I am sure if we moved to Oz that we could make friends there too and settle in just as well although I do realise that it is on the other side of the world and everything will be different to what we are used to.

I wish you all the best and hope that you feel more settled very soon. I know if we do emigrate that I will use this site quite a lot! Only joined yesterday but have found so much useful info and everyone is so great!!

Jo

[Bermudashorts]

I have only just started my Australian visa application, but did live in Bermuda for two years until the middle of last year. I know everybody is different but I definitely think it would be a shame to go home after three months, you would always be wondering if you had stayed a bit longer would you have made it work for you. And it is an awful lot to go through for three months isn't it?

Our Bermuda move was never intended as a permanent one (it isn't allowed) but we have decided that should we make the move to Australia we are going to give it minimum five years and if we have not settled only then would we think about coming back. I think it works for us to set a time limit rule at the beginning that we both agree to.

[geraldine.w]

give yourself some more time and dont be hasty...think of all the reasons you wanted to come here it will take time to get over homesickness and your child will settle much quicker if you are settled, its the certainty of change, hang in there and at least give it a couple of years, then go back for a holiday to see if all you are missing is all that and u may be suprised.good luck and hope you settle soon

[Sammy T]

Hi

Everyone has given you lots of good advice so I won't add any more (not sure I have any!) Just to let you know we went through a very similar process at about 3 months but we felt we just couldn't pack it all in after so short a time, we have now been here 8 months and those feelings have not gone away completely but they are under control! However, my OH still wants to return to the UK and I'm very undecided, but we have bought a house and financially/emotionally just couldn't go through it all again yet, so we are trying to get on with things here and if we decide in another year or so that it is really not for us, then we will return then. We have talked about emigrating for so long that if we had not actually made the move we would always be wondering "what if" - no matter what happens in the future, whether we return or stay here, we will always know we that we tried it.

So, go easy on yourself and I hope it all works out for you.

Sam

[mark28]

Hi,

We have been over here for 7 months now and have quite a large network of mainly ex pats that we have met locally, not sure what ages you are we are 39 and 32 and our daughter is 3, we live locally to you (Fairlight) and I am sure my other half would be happy to meet up and introduce you to others if it helps also ?

Australia is an amazing place, yes family and friends are important but think of the positives for here, lower crime, weather that allows you to get out as a family most of the time, it is expensive particularly in the Northern Beaches but it is great here, beaches, beaches and more beaches, walks, seawater pools etc.

Skype if you haven't got it is great with a web cam to see everyone back home, not exactly the same as being there but good to see them while talking etc.

Explore every weekend you can and find places that you like, anyway enough rambling from me but happy to meet etc if you want and good luck.

[Caddy the cat lover]

Hi

We've been here nearly 3 months and so far so good. Ups and downs......yep.... emotional roller coaster......yep.....loving it.....yep !!!
We're not ready to say that it will be forever so for us its a 5 year plan.
Forever seems too long at this point !!!!
We are finding that we cope better knowing that our time here is a gift, an adventure and an opportunity that we should embrace.

One thing thats really difficult is that everyone back in the UK demands a part of you !!!
They want to chat to you on SKYPE, they e-mail you and want a reply, they phone and text you....they are excited for you and want to know all about your new life !!!
There are loads of them and only one of you !
Emotionally they drain you !!!!
Initially we were obsessed with SKYPE and e-mailing updates, we fell into the trap of not wanting to offend anyone and not wanting them to think we had forgotten them xxxxxx We spent a lot of time writing e-mail updates and making sure that SKYPE was on incase our parents were trying to contact us.
In a way our constant UK contact was holding us back from moving on in our new life and brought us to the point of emotional despair !!!

In a nutshell, we decided that our new life had to take priority and that we had to reduce our contact with the UK.
We decided that we would call our family on a Saturday or Sunday and basically get on with our lives in between.

It worked !!!
Its great to chat to them all at the weekend and we look forward to conversations that are meaningful rather than 'daily updates'. We can tell them about our week and can allow ourselves to be enthusiastic about our lives.

I really hope you start to feel settled soon xxxx
Alison xx