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-   -   My Strangest Conversation in Dubai Yet !!! (https://britishexpats.com/forum/sand-pit-116/my-strangest-conversation-dubai-yet-504737/)

Paidtoplease Jan 9th 2008 3:03 am

My Strangest Conversation in Dubai Yet !!!
 
Last Night

Knock Knock...

Hello Can I help you

You give me job:
I have no jobs, sorry

But I want to work for you:
I have no Jobs. sorry

I look after your garden, wash car, cook:
I don't need anyone for that:

But yu av Garden, car and eat ???
Yes I do but I don't need anyone

You take me, give me room:
No, I not take you, don't need

You bad lady
No, not bad just don't need any help

You not feed my family
Your family not my responsibility

You need to feed family, they come and stay with you, my wife cook, clean, you send children to school
I don't need any help, they can not stay

But you have rooms
No I dont

You have garden
Yes with one tree

I take care of tree ???
Good Bye, shut door...........................

What's been yours ???

MataHari Jan 9th 2008 3:22 am

Re: My Strangest Conversation in Dubai Yet !!!
 
lol...mine would be a few variations on the one you had...especially when we first moved here the amount of people that knocked on our door was scary...

The worst one was a carpet sales guy....I couldn't get rid of him, he kept on coming and was really persistant...not nice...

And lots of phonecalls for directions...with me shouting 15the STREET!!!! and the man saying...but no 15th street here mam....and so on and so on...

Paidtoplease Jan 9th 2008 3:27 am

Re: My Strangest Conversation in Dubai Yet !!!
 

Originally Posted by MataHari (Post 5761615)
lol...mine would be a few variations on the one you had...especially when we first moved here the amount of people that knocked on our door was scary...

The worst one was a carpet sales guy....I couldn't get rid of him, he kept on coming and was really persistant...not nice...

And lots of phonecalls for directions...with me shouting 15the STREET!!!! and the man saying...but no 15th street here mam....and so on and so on...

Hell yes, direction conversations were painfull !!!

Inselaffen Jan 9th 2008 4:45 am

Re: My Strangest Conversation in Dubai Yet !!!
 

Originally Posted by Paidtoplease (Post 5761572)
Last Night

Knock Knock...

Hello Can I help you

You give me job:
I have no jobs, sorry

But I want to work for you:
I have no Jobs. sorry

I look after your garden, wash car, cook:
I don't need anyone for that:

But yu av Garden, car and eat ???
Yes I do but I don't need anyone

You take me, give me room:
No, I not take you, don't need

You bad lady
No, not bad just don't need any help

You not feed my family
Your family not my responsibility

You need to feed family, they come and stay with you, my wife cook, clean, you send children to school
I don't need any help, they can not stay

But you have rooms
No I dont

You have garden
Yes with one tree

I take care of tree ???
Good Bye, shut door...........................

What's been yours ???

surprised he didnt offer to take care of your personal needs too :D
you do seem to attract nutters

Paidtoplease Jan 9th 2008 4:56 am

Re: My Strangest Conversation in Dubai Yet !!!
 

Originally Posted by Inselaffen (Post 5761788)
surprised he didnt offer to take care of your personal needs too :D
you do seem to attract nutters

Hello :rolleyes:

nottmbantam Jan 9th 2008 8:12 am

Re: My Strangest Conversation in Dubai Yet !!!
 
Aha - so this is what I have to look forward to when I make it out there! :D

Paidtoplease Jan 9th 2008 8:56 am

Re: My Strangest Conversation in Dubai Yet !!!
 

Originally Posted by nottmbantam (Post 5762285)
Aha - so this is what I have to look forward to when I make it out there! :D

Its a hoot and minute :D

nottmbantam Jan 9th 2008 10:58 am

Re: My Strangest Conversation in Dubai Yet !!!
 
Just remembered one of the daftest conversations I'd had.

Picture the scene, it was October 24th, I was at home, sitting comfortably watching the telly. The house I was living in was a simple two bed terrace house, with no front garden, the front door opened out onto the pavement.

I heard a knock on the door, around 7.00pm, so it was dark. Opened the door to find a youngish girl / woman ( 18ish? ) standing at my door, and noticed her boyfriend / male companion? standing a few feet behind her.

her: Trick or Treat
Me: Eh?

her: Trick or Treat, its Halloween
Me: Errmm, no its not til next week.

Her: yeah, I know, but I live in London.
Me: <shocked and shtunned ) errr, no thanks.

matthew.lewis2 Jan 9th 2008 11:19 am

Re: My Strangest Conversation in Dubai Yet !!!
 

Originally Posted by Paidtoplease (Post 5761624)
Hell yes, direction conversations were painfull !!!

Try giving directions to a villa in an area that has no street numbers and no villa numbers!

I have to give directions by the nearest traffic lights, then a roundabout, and then say over three speed humps, and there is my villa.

What colour villa sir??? Cream, like most other villas here!!

Paidtoplease Jan 9th 2008 11:40 am

Re: My Strangest Conversation in Dubai Yet !!!
 

Originally Posted by matthew.lewis2 (Post 5763161)
Try giving directions to a villa in an area that has no street numbers and no villa numbers!

I have to give directions by the nearest traffic lights, then a roundabout, and then say over three speed humps, and there is my villa.

What colour villa sir??? Cream, like most other villas here!!

Turn left at the sand dune
then 2nd sand dune turn right, pass another 6 sand dune and mine is the sand colured villa on the left ....easy .....

littlejimmy Jan 9th 2008 1:47 pm

Re: My Strangest Conversation in Dubai Yet !!!
 
"Hello, Sir. I am outside your villa now."

"No you're not."

"Yes I am."

Ad infinitum.

Miss Eck Jan 9th 2008 1:50 pm

Re: My Strangest Conversation in Dubai Yet !!!
 

Originally Posted by littlejimmy (Post 5763661)
"Hello, Sir. I am outside your villa now."

"No you're not."

"Yes I am."

Ad infinitum.

How true!!!
:rofl:

Cham128 Jan 9th 2008 1:55 pm

Re: My Strangest Conversation in Dubai Yet !!!
 

Originally Posted by Paidtoplease (Post 5761572)
Last Night

Knock Knock...

Hello Can I help you

You give me job:
I have no jobs, sorry

But I want to work for you:
I have no Jobs. sorry

I look after your garden, wash car, cook:
I don't need anyone for that:

But yu av Garden, car and eat ???
Yes I do but I don't need anyone

You take me, give me room:
No, I not take you, don't need

You bad lady
No, not bad just don't need any help

You not feed my family
Your family not my responsibility

You need to feed family, they come and stay with you, my wife cook, clean, you send children to school
I don't need any help, they can not stay

But you have rooms
No I dont

You have garden
Yes with one tree

I take care of tree ???
Good Bye, shut door...........................

What's been yours ???

my god that was you? i'm so sorry... what do you think i need to work on next time i knock? :eek:

Madam Medusa Jan 9th 2008 2:01 pm

Re: My Strangest Conversation in Dubai Yet !!!
 

Originally Posted by littlejimmy (Post 5763661)
"Hello, Sir. I am outside your villa now."

"No you're not."

"Yes I am."

Ad infinitum.

oh hell yeah...bleedin dubai transport...

MM, xx

Alexa Jan 10th 2008 1:18 pm

Re: My Strangest Conversation in Dubai Yet !!!
 

Originally Posted by littlejimmy (Post 5763661)
"Hello, Sir. I am outside your villa now."

"No you're not."

"Yes I am."

Ad infinitum.

Had one like that too..
On the phone : Madam, I am here.
"Who are you ?"
I am here
"Very good, but who are you?"
Madam, you are house
"No, I am not a house and I am not expecting anybody"
Yes Madam, I am here"
Good, stay here. Good bye.

I wonder if she is still "here"....


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