Dire Bollock All - my five rules of life
#1
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Thread Starter
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 13,553
Dire Bollock All - my five rules of life
Hello,
Dire Bollock All here!
I have decided that, as you are all so pathetically inferior to me, and have less money, and all drive Ford Focuses, I will share with you my secrets.
These are the rules that have helped me irritate people for decades. I have always found that if I stick to them, people will get a pretty good idea of the sort of person I am.
There are FIVE key rules, which are:
1 – If I have a hole in my pocket, I feel cocky all day
2 – Me having sex is like me fighting Mike Tyson; I get licked in the ring by a big strong man
3 – My penis is like a cheese soufflé; however much I beat it, it still stays soft
4 – Sex with a woman is like popularity; it’s something I will never experience
5 – It doesn't matter how successful you are; if you act like a tosspot, people may start to think you ARE a tosspot.
Now come on people, get out there and see if YOU can be like ME!!!!!!
Dire Bollock All here!
I have decided that, as you are all so pathetically inferior to me, and have less money, and all drive Ford Focuses, I will share with you my secrets.
These are the rules that have helped me irritate people for decades. I have always found that if I stick to them, people will get a pretty good idea of the sort of person I am.
There are FIVE key rules, which are:
1 – If I have a hole in my pocket, I feel cocky all day
2 – Me having sex is like me fighting Mike Tyson; I get licked in the ring by a big strong man
3 – My penis is like a cheese soufflé; however much I beat it, it still stays soft
4 – Sex with a woman is like popularity; it’s something I will never experience
5 – It doesn't matter how successful you are; if you act like a tosspot, people may start to think you ARE a tosspot.
Now come on people, get out there and see if YOU can be like ME!!!!!!
#3
Re: Dire Bollock All - my five rules of life
I can't I am a successful business woman, is is Indie and all the ladies on here
#4
Re: Dire Bollock All - my five rules of life
Hello,
Dire Bollock All here!
I have decided that, as you are all so pathetically inferior to me, and have less money, and all drive Ford Focuses, I will share with you my secrets.
These are the rules that have helped me irritate people for decades. I have always found that if I stick to them, people will get a pretty good idea of the sort of person I am.
There are FIVE key rules, which are:
1 – If I have a hole in my pocket, I feel cocky all day
2 – Me having sex is like me fighting Mike Tyson; I get licked in the ring by a big strong man
3 – My penis is like a cheese soufflé; however much I beat it, it still stays soft
4 – Sex with a woman is like popularity; it’s something I will never experience
5 – It doesn't matter how successful you are; if you act like a tosspot, people may start to think you ARE a tosspot.
Now come on people, get out there and see if YOU can be like ME!!!!!!
Dire Bollock All here!
I have decided that, as you are all so pathetically inferior to me, and have less money, and all drive Ford Focuses, I will share with you my secrets.
These are the rules that have helped me irritate people for decades. I have always found that if I stick to them, people will get a pretty good idea of the sort of person I am.
There are FIVE key rules, which are:
1 – If I have a hole in my pocket, I feel cocky all day
2 – Me having sex is like me fighting Mike Tyson; I get licked in the ring by a big strong man
3 – My penis is like a cheese soufflé; however much I beat it, it still stays soft
4 – Sex with a woman is like popularity; it’s something I will never experience
5 – It doesn't matter how successful you are; if you act like a tosspot, people may start to think you ARE a tosspot.
Now come on people, get out there and see if YOU can be like ME!!!!!!