honeybunny2011

My Mam is from Co Kildare (but moved to dub when she was a young wan) and my dad was Canadian. I have canadian and irish passports and have travelled all over canada. Only reason we came to nz was because my hubby is a kiwi but I do wish we had of tried canada first. So ****** hard when you have kids to think about tho. I'm gutted that Ireland is in such shite as I kinda feel stuck here and although I like it here its not in the forever plan. Think I just have severe homesickness at the mo which will pass I know.

My very white kiwi hubby has a half maori brother (different dads) and he is VERY scary haha!!!

honeybunny2011

Tho I must admit my time in van was spent drinking and living above a strip joint!!!

Londonuck

Its a funny place. In '98 when we got there the downtown area was pretty poor entertainment wise. Pubs were awful, apart from the Railway Tavern, and we were thinking it was a bit like a pretty retirement home. It did improve and i have to say ive had some absolutely mental nights in Vancouver. I also miss the hot tub up at Whistler in Glaciers Reach. I went to Whistler about 30 times and never skied once Ooh and long weekends in Penticton in summer.

honeybunny2011

haha, I also went to whistler for a week and never skied once. I LOVED banff, tried to find a job there but there was nothing. Oh and lake louise was beautiful. Its truly a beautiful country. Whats the work situation like in the uk at the moment? We have friends leaving here in a few weeks to go live in London.

Londonuck

There are jobs but its not as easy as it used to be to ride through a recession.

Joe-Soap

On a positive note, the over supply of property during the boom has meant rental prices in Meath and Louth have dropped by 15-20%. The house prices have dropped by 30-40% You can bargain harder on rental prices as a result.
The rent prices in Dublin are still at silly Celtic Tiger prices, and the quality of accommodation there is low standard.
I chose Dundalk as its cheaper and only 1 hour from Dublin. I get the benefits of cross border shopping in Newry only 20 minutes away. Dublin is good for a day out or to work in, but I wouldn't want to live there.
What amuses me is all the Dublin D4 types and wannabees D4 people that try to talk in this fake posh D4 accent. They all wear the uniform; iphone D4 (4s), Louis Vuitton handbags, Chanel Handbags, Chanel sunglasses. It reminds me of Sloane Square with all the Chelsea tractors (Range Rovers) being driven about taking their little darlings to ballet and piano lessons after Prep School.
The funny thing is they all love the London accent on a man. Oh yaa! You are from Londaaaan! Makes me laugh.
Another legacy of the boom years: Dublin D4 people.

DoyleLinda

I would like to go back to Ireland too, but then Im only here six months so the homesickness is deffo talking right now, perhaps i will have a different view when Ive been here longer. My kids are 5, 10 and 13 and they have settled well but because there is so much pressure on us as a couple to pay the bills, (which are never ending), and keep things going I often wonder if it would have been easier to just stay at home, i have to keep reminding myself why we did this. We pay my entire wages to rent and my OH wages goes on hydro, phone, groceries and gas, and often we have nothing the day after we are both paid. Its not good for the soul at times. But when I log into my facebook account and read all the posts from back home about the doom and gloom back there i tell myself why im living like this. My mother tells me constantly to stay put because there is nothing for us back there. We left a beautiful home just outside Arklow, co. Wicklow which is now rented out and the rent is not even covering the mortgage, but it covers half so we are hoping that we will be able to sell the house in a few years time if things ever pick up in the property market. AT the moment nobody would buy it cos arklow has been hit very badly with the recession. People losing their homes every day and nobody has employment. My kids love the schooling over here which is one thing on a positive note, and I too find the school system much better over here, and they take great interest in each individual child, not like at home. Unless you are the son or daughter of the local councillor often you are just left at the back of the class. My father was also from Ringsend, and we lived in Clondalkin for many years, my mother is from Rathdrum, Co. Wicklow and we have nobody here in Canada, it was something we decided to do a few years ago and fought hard to get here. OUr first LMO was refused and we got an LMO for Edson which we decided to take, and the original LMO was approved the second time around, after a month in Edson. We are applying for PNP at the end of February when we have been working six months here. We want to try get PR even tho our hearts are not entirely here but if we have PR it may open other avenues to us. OH is a mechanic but the wages here in Manitoba are crap so he might as well be sweeping the roads to be honest, sick of hearing people saying oh so your hubby has a trade, you guys must be making a fortune, so not true. I have a degree in business and an accounting qualification but it stands for nothing here and people like me work in Kelseys and Tim Hortons. I spent years upskilling and Im still only earning minimum wage here and I constantly get reminded by my boss how lucky I am he hired me. Oh well, like I say, it surely must beat the doom and gloom from home and the fact that there is some kind of light at the end of the tunnel keeps us going. WE are both currently trying to get 2nd jobs but problem is the kids spend too much time at home alone as it is but catch 22 situation, you have to work to survive. Im delighted I opened this post now cos its interesting to read each others stories. Keep the faith everyone. And Honey Bunny, I would deffo stay put if I was you, there are so many people dying to get out of Ireland right now. Best wishes.

Londonuck

You know they sell Tim Hortons in Ireland now Linda?

Joe-Soap

I read your post with interest. I think if you are feeling homesick after only 6 months after emigrating, something is wrong; very wrong. The feeling wont go away. My advice is to come back to Ireland, where you have family and a home. If your rent isn't covering your mortgage its madness to keep doing what you are doing. It sounds like you are existing, not living; and there is a profound difference. Ireland is broke, that's a mute point; but you mustn't let your balanced judgement be coloured by doom and gloom merchants. Its in Irish peoples nature to moan about everything. We are a nation of begrudgers and nay sayers, and you have to bear that in mind when people are saying how bad it is. I can tell you straight, this is the third year I am living here and I love it. I would never go back to London from Ireland. Yes, nice views don't put food on the table; but there is more to life than working yourself to death just to keep your head above water. I have been unemployed here for 2 years and my quality of life is better than when I worked in London 60 hours a week and binged in a life of excess at the weekends. People are still friendly in Ireland and family orientated. That makes a big difference when you are going through a tough time. You can't put a price on it. What you have to remember is that Ireland has been through recessions before, and come through them. It was the reason my parents left Ireland for London in 1960. Now 50 years later its just the same. I am just biding my time until things improve. What you have to weigh up is your work life balance, and quality of life. I was breaking my back to pay my first mortgage at 21 years old. I am 35 now and think I am not doing that any more, recession or no recession. The truth is that things in Ireland aren't that bad. There are no jobs, but that's not the be all and end all of life. What can you do about it? Nothing. So I don't worry about it. I am getting 752 Euro Job Seekers Allowance, and 280 Euro Rent Allowance; that's 1032 Euro per month in social welfare. Life's not so bad in Ireland.

Londonuck

I dont know Sean. Homesickness can and probably will go away but Ireland problems arent going anywhere for a long time. I guarantee she'll be back a few weeks and wonder what hell did she come back for.

DoyleLinda

wouldnt it be great if life were that simple. We have three young children to consider here so having made the decision to uproot them from their comfort zone wasnt one we took lightly, we simply couldnt possibly turn around 6 mths later and go back. We have given ourselves a two year time frame and if we feel its not going to get any better then we decided we would look at things again but its too soon to make a rash decision just yet. Its not as simple for us to go back home either, cos we left debts behind us, we had a car that we had to return to the finance company and two business loans that we had personally guaranteed without knowing at the time. We also have a mortgage to pay and wouldnt be in a position to repay the mortgage with the way things were going. my OH hadnt worked for over two years and his social welfare was much smaller than what you have quoted here. Im shocked that you get so much. We werent able to live on what he was getting, the only reason we could was because we got help from my parents. It was an impossible situation towards the end and there was no light at the end of the tunnel. We wouldnt even have been able to afford to send our daughter to secondary school, let alone to college in a few years time. We couldnt afford the books, uniform, etc. like I say if only it were that simple. We are not in a position to just turn around and go back, in fact even if we both really wanted to we wouldnt even be able to afford the air fare. i have been told that it takes at least two years to get on your feet here having given up everything and had to start all over again, we had to buy everything when we came including beds, furniture, kitchen utensils, the lot. We only shipped clothes and kids stuff. We rented out home in Ireland out fully furnished but we couldnt get the rent to cover the mortgage cos of where we lived. It was impossible to find renters to pay anymore than 650.00 euros per month and our mortgage was 900.00 per month. So thats our situation. We are here now, paying 1500 dollars a month rent, and the rest goes on bills but we have a reason to get up in the morning and our kids have some kind of future to look forward to. I have been told that there is nothing going to change back home for a long time and i have many friends in situations that they cannot see themselves getting out of. I also have friends who have committed suicide due to depression from debt, etc so i really think deep down that altho its difficult for us right now it has to get better and it has to be better than worrying about the next letter in through the letter box that you cannot afford to pay. We are going to give it the two year timescale and hopefully things will improve. i agree that there is more to life than mere survival but right now thats all we can hope for. Our kids have to come first and everything else second to that. I also agree it would be great to be at home with the support of family, etc. but we didnt have much of that so unfortunately that wasnt something that wouldve kept us at home, the one thing i miss the most is my dear mother who is now left back in ireland on her own with no grandchildren to see growing up in front of her but hopefully she will come over here in the Summer and visit. She is not too old to do that thankfully. So thats my story really, not much of a choice Im afraid. you are a lucky person if you are getting that much money on social welfare cos i really dont think that we would be in the same boat having had two years of a nightmare trying to fight for just the basics from social welfare so count yourself lucky. thanks again for all the advice, but this is the situation we have to live with for now and have to make the best of it. i pray every day that things will get better and what doesnt break me will only make me stronger.

jonboy

Well done on a great post Linda. I appreciate your situation is a difficult one but you seem to have a good angle on it. Like many other people who have had to seek a new life abroad you are missing the country you have left behind. As you said in your post you can see a future for you and your family in your new country and I guess part of that future will at some point involve revisiting family and friends back in Ireland. In the meantime you have your immediate family with you and with one an others support you will make a full life for your selves in the new country.
I wish you all well

jonboy

honeybunny2011

Linda your post pulled at my heartstrings So much for you to deal with on top of a new country, new culture, new lifestyle etc.... Your boss sounds like a right aul shite. I really feel for you having to both get 2nd jobs. Money defo makes the world go round. I had young kids when we moved here and I just could not settle. We had brought a large some of money with us and were pushed into buying a house we didnt really like because we were afraid that the banks were going to collapse and we would lose everything. We also have plenty of weeks where my OH gets paid and then a few days later we have next to nothing. I am not working and dont intend to as the childcare for 3 kids would be nearly the same as what I would earn. We have OH's family here but they havnt even brought the kids out to the park or to the shop for an icecream since we have been here. They dont really like kids so have never shown an interest. Really drives me insane.

When I got here i spent at least 6 months very unhappy so we decided to go back for a holiday. I couldnt believe how bad things were in ireland and that was in 2009. I had to get back on that plane and return here and hope things would get better for me. I figured that we could go back for another 3 years at the most and things would be better in Ireland by then. We are nearly here 4 years and its no better in Ireland. I was so sad that my oldest was learning to count in Maori and not in gealic but I slowly came around to it and was glad eventually that at least he was learning another language. I suffered such bad homesickness that I went to see a life coach and she really did help me move on. I didnt cope very well with the bugs etc... I woke up one night and went into the bathroom and saw a cockroach on my toothbrush. I went through about 4 different sprays before I found something that stopped the mozzies from eating me alive. The food was so different, nothing like irish food. I laughed when my OH suggested we eat pumpkin for dinner, to me that was something we carved out at halloween. I started homebaking as I couldnt justify paying $10 for a cake. I became sick of people telling me to give it more time. I was giving time, time. Our first winter here was shit. Our house had no heating or double glazing so we had to get a gas fire in and that only kept one room warm at a time. We have since had to get heaters in bedrooms and its a bit better but I dread the winters coming again. Our electricity bill is $300-$400 a month. In our first house here, tablets would crush into nothing when you picked them up it was so cold.

I feel that I have given it my best shot here after this long now and I do feel stuck here til we are in a better position to go back with savings etc... A holiday there is $17,000 to $20,000 so its not a holiday you would save for every year or even every 3 years. I hate the location of this country. I havnt seen my mam in almost 2 years and my brother in almost 3 years. I have missed out on his kids growing up. Thankfully a year ago my mam went to a computer course and learned how to skype. This was a big step for her as she had trouble working out the microwave.

I finally made a very good friend, a few infact and because of them I am alot happier here. There are alot of expats here, english, south african, aussies etc.. and most of them have settled and done well and all have big houses and nice lifestyles. I have had some bad days over christmas and birthdays and that little battle that I have goin on in my head is a nightmare. I had a baby here too and that was so hard going through it all without my mam. Nobody in Ireland has met my baby and thats so hard. I have 1 friend so down about the recession as she is now on a payfreeze and has to work so much harder making her days longer. My brother, who lives in clondalkin is down to 3 days a week and he is sick of it all too. I also have other friends that are not really effected at all by it. I just keep reminding myself that it was the best thing to do for my family. It would be very hard on OH if he was at home all day long for years and years. I think he could handle 1 or 2 years at the most but 5-10 years would be too much, even with kids keeping him/us busy. We have friends leaving here in a few weeks and I am so envious of them heading back. We also have friends moving out here next tuesday because things are so bad in Ireland. Another irish family we know that moved here in July last year, hate it here and are trying to get a job in the usa. They dont want to return to Ireland.

I'm glad we came as it has been a great adventure for us, and my OH was able to spend some time with his family, even if they are a useless bunch of you know what.................. I got to spend time with my kids while they are young and need me and I have learned alot since I left Ireland. It is better to have tried something than to sit and wonder what it would of been like had you not tried something.

You are doin whats best for you family right now. In years to come you will be glad that at least you tried, who knows you might start to enjoy it more, the economy will pick up at some point and you might be able to return to Ireland if you still feel the same. I really hope things improve for you and I admire your determination PM me if you ever need to vent. I have trawled through hundreds of posts on here and we are not alone when it comes to settling in another country. Lastly, be kind to yourself, dont be too hard on yourself

Joe-Soap

Running away from debt is never a good reason for emigrating. To be honest with you, I think you have made a real mess of things. You should have declared yourself bankrupt and allowed your house to be repossessed. At least that would write off the bulk of your debt. It sounds like you bought a house you could not afford. Now it is in negative equity what is the point of continuing to service the mortgage on it? You would be better off writing it off. Bankruptcy lasts 12 years in Ireland. It is unlikely you would ever get a mortgage again anyway, due to your poor credit history. It sounds like you bought during the Celtic Tiger boom at premium market value. You are not alone in doing this. I think your debts are the real reason you are afraid to come back to Ireland. You can't face up to them. One should never emigrate when you are broke. Definitely not when you are broke, and you owe money too. It will all catch up with you in the end. I think it would do you good to come back and sort the mess out. It will be a load off your minds. Running away from your Irish debts isn't the way to start again.

Mitzyboy

Linda, for Gods sake dont listen to forumites on such an important and complex subject ...... getting it wrong could be a disaster

Plenty of people in Spain were advised to throw their keys over the bank counter and run back to the UK when they were getting into trouble. The bank might sell the house then to recover costs, but if they dont cover the mortgage then they still come after the owner for the balance

If you want to address the subject then go to a debt councillor