Philosophical 11

Thanks John,

Yes, you are correct. I was inundated with advice to move away from here but I took into consideration that she had been away from her family long enough (6 - 7 years) providing for them. I wanted her to make up for those lost years. But my perseverance has paid off I believe. I do not get bothered anymore by them. She visits them most days and they rarely come here. Which ironically is a bit of a shame.

Forgot to mention in my previous post that I might just have to look for ways of earning money. Yes, I know I cannot own a business and if my lovely lady was financed by me for a business I would be very much hands on. And I know I cannot work on a tourist visa. But I will be looking into teaching on-line English. Not something that appeals to me but....needs must.

Regards

mikemike

But I will be looking into teaching on-line English

Here are some on line sites that may be of help

Make $30/Hour Teaching English Classes Online: Top 3 Sites That Will Pay You - MoneyPantry

http://apply.121learn.com/ this last one is from this site under Job Offers - British Expats

morpeth

Most of the online sites for teaching English to Chinese students seem to pay $8 to $12 an hour. To make more it seems getting a TESOL certificate of some sort helpful, they can range in cost between $200 up to $1,400.

Stokkevn

I used to get the text message every 5 minutes if I was left to look after myself when 'her indoors' went to see the family, but now she has given up, mainly because I always replied with messages like "What is the hourly rate for a call girl, she wants to go home", "Where did you leave your money, we need to get more drinks" or "Your blond friend came to see you, I will keep her company till you get home". In the beginning she would cover about 200m across rice field and muddy path in the dark quicker than Linford Chistie could do a 100m dash on track.

She no longer bothers because she knows that if she does she will have to dash home to see if it is true and it never is. My short term pain was well worth the long term gain

LPR

These posts have been a real eye opener about life in the Philippines with a Filipina and how obstacles can be overcome with perseverance.

Looks like I have some new and interesting experiences waiting for me.

Philosophical 11

Greetings,

Thought I would share this sorry state of affairs. As most of you know I am going through a divorce and have reached the Decree Nisi stage some time ago. The financial settlement has been agreed amicably where she gets the house and a payment of £3k. That is the bulk of my savings. Although I have used the term amicably, I didn't really have much choice because if I had contested it, my lawyers fees would probably be as much or higher and there was a good chance I would have to make a personal appearance to fight my case in court. There was no way I wished to return to the UK anyway.

Here comes the sucker punch. The court hearing was set on Jul 4th to settle the amicably agreed financial settlement. I let the court know that I was not able to attend because of the costs involved etc. The hearing was expected to last for 10 mins. The case was adjourned because the judge has ordered that I should be in attendance and has been reset for 1 Aug for a 10 min hearing.

Now with the agreement of my ex-wifes solicitor, I have now asked that a telephone facility be set up so that I can remain here. The solicitor has also separately asked the court for this facility to be put in place for me. Now I await the outcome if this request will be met. The thought of having to return to the UK, pay for car hire and accommodation I find particularly galling. Just for a 10 min hearing where both parties are in agreement on the settlement. Plus the phaff of travelling to Cebu/Manila to obtain exit clearance. Twice (no express-lane). The cost of all this would be hard hitting as you can imagine.

And of course my lovely lady does not want me to return to the UK also....I will be glad when this is all sorted and I can look forward to the future.

Regards

Stokkevn

Things must have changed, I just gave my solicitor permission to act on my behalf by signing a couple of documents that limited his power to about six points that were to be brought up and that was accepted by the court and I was only in Norway.

If you are doing Skype, be sure to have a power back up as Sods Law will dictate that there will be a power cut 5 minutes before you need to use it.

David Mashael

Thats a bummer feel for you, you don't need all that hassle.
I'm wondering why the judge has felt this necessary.
My divorce went through the court in UK without either my wife or myself having to attend. I selected a divorce company from an on-line search and used them. Total cost £600 plus court fees. In fact everything was done by email apart from the documents which needed signatures, they were sent by courier. Perhaps it's because there are financial matters involved, but even so, if you had already reached "agreement" on that, I'm still surprised.

Pollyana

Having looked into UK divorce laws myself recently it does sound very odd. Everything amicable and agreed on, finances sorted, and no children involved - what is there to gain from a personal appearance?

The only thing that occurs to me - and this is a result of an Australian divorce case, not a UK one - is that maybe the judge is unsure that he knows exactly what he is signing over? In the case I am thinking of the wife had a large property portfolio, and the husband just wanted to walk away from it, didn't want a share (for his own good reasons). The judge insisted on extra legal statements so that he was sure the guy knew what he was giving up.

I would also echo the advice above - do not rely on Skype alone, have a back-up system in place. One would assume most courts these days would be able to do video-conferencing in a few different ways, so make sure there is a second option if needed. I reckon out of 20 video-conferences we do, 5 will need a back-up, and thats using government systems, checked daily.

Wishing you all the best

Philosophical 11

Greetings!

Thanks for the responses.

The actual divorce procedure did not require any personal appearances from either of us. Just seems to be rubber stamped.

It is the financial order that is giving me grief. Everything has been agreed between us. But Pollyana is correct. Her solicitor thinks my personal appearance is necessary so he can make sure I know what I am doing and have had proper legal advice etc. Still no response for my application to have telephone facilities set up which I would not have thought would be too difficult in this day and age. If this is not possible, I will try and ask for the case to be moved to another court that can facilitate this. If not, perhaps engage a solicitor to personally represent me. No idea if this is feasible. It just seems a waste of time, effort and money. I am after all a big boy now.....I know my own mind!

Thanks again

Stokkevn

You could try telling her solicitor that you are willing to come back to the UK when you can afford the travel which will most likely be some time next year. Or that traveling there and back in a couple of days would be detrimental to your health, which by the sounds of your gf, it could be.

Philosophical 11

Greetings Again..

Stokkevn: Detrimental to my health... Not sure about that but it may well be to my lovely ladies health! She may well be thinking that I am not coming back which I guess puts more strain on me. I can just imagine the msgs every hour I will be getting if I have to go back.

Interestingly I have to leave the Phils before March 26th next year in keeping with the exit rule but I had no plans to return to the UK because of the expense etc.

Still find it odd that the court has a signed document from myself and the ex wife agreeing to a financial settlement. What point is a signed document if its not believed?

I did suggest to her solicitor that I pay the monies now and she gets on with the house transfer to obviate any necessary appearance at the court. Doesn't work that way apparently.

Still....we shall see how this unfolds.

Regards

Dorothy

Perhaps let her solicitor know that the costs of you appearing in person will be deducted from any settlement. After all, if ylthey want you there they can pay for it

Philosophical 11

That's the problem Dorothy....her solicitor does not require my presence. But the judge does.

Regards

Dorothy

That's pretty crap. Hope you can get it sorted.