marblep

I'm a NZ'er. Went to the UK many years ago. Stayed 7 years. Met and married the man of my dreams. We've been back in NZ for 8 years. We have a 4 year old daughter.

He loves it and never wants to leave. We are very fortunate that we can take time off work each, so he's about to have a year off to be a stay at home dad. And if we scrimp and save a bit, we can pay for his parents to come for here Xmas. (We have a big mortgage, but we're making it work).

But, if we were both UKers, I'd think twice about moving here. I'd consider other places in the UK. Or Europe.

We've been incredibly lucky that I have the fall back of a very lucrative industry. And my husband works in an industry in which he has a fantastic name and reputation.

We love it here, but we love the UK too. For us, the difference is where we lived and what we could achieve. We love Suffolk, but it's not near a beach. And I can earn far more in NZ. But that's down to the industry I've been in since day one.

Each to their own. I wish you all the best on your journeys.

TommyLuck

Interesting post, that - what industry do you work in?

Feel free to tell me to naff off.

Now we can see the light, with regards to our departure, my OH, a Kiwi, can't wait to be in NZ with all her mates who also have young families. All her mates in London have loads of disposible income and party too for hard for a mother of a two year old.

I'm intruiged to see, in time, how she feels in say 2, 5, 10 years time.

marblep

Hi TommyLuck, I work in the Supermarket industry.

I can definitely understand your wife wanting to be back with friends who have young families. Partying is not much fun when you have to get up in the morning with a young one.

All the best with your move.

scottishstacey

Good update. Do you mind me asking your reasons for thinking twice

marblep

Hi Stacey. I think the reason I'd think twice is family. We're at the stage (young child) where we need that family support. It would be really tough to have neither family here. I really admire those people that do. Also, I feel terribly guilty about my in-laws missing out on things with my daughter, and being away from them as they age. But being a UK/NZ couple - it's inevitable that it would be the case wherever we live.

However, if you're both young - I say go for it. What have you got to lose? Just treat it like an adventure and see what happens.

I love NZ - it has tons of great things going for it.

I see you're doing lots of research and asking lots of pertinent questions, which is great. I'm an over-thinker too.

But in your case - I'd say just do it.

TommyLuck

I find this interesting.

In our situation I'm the one who ultimately was a catalyst for the move, therefore the one who will be taking my daughter away from my family.

And yet, I don't feel guilty. I feel as if I'm the one who is seeking to, to use a oft quoted cliche - broaden my horizons, where my family live their cosy, routine lives. Which isn't a bad thing, but it's not for me.


However ....


I think this is a large proportion of the reason why I'm ok with myself for doing this.

marblep

TommyLuck.

Absolutely! Are you still in the UK? I did offer you a pm, but the mods mustn't agree.

We're having a great time. And I know you will too.

BEVS

Que ?

Catchafire

We moved here in our 30's, got married and are raising two beautiful girls currently 3 and 5 yrs old.

Not having any immediate family around when bring up baby, was a challenge, we had to change the way we were living and earning our income. I started my own company and worked from home, to provide as much support for my wife. The other outcome has been, I have always been there for our kids, my wife and I have a great relationship, based around sharing of our responsibilities, her supporting me in my business and the great feeling that we are doing the right thing.

So it can be done, I know lots of other expat families here now and we have a good social circle and at times support network.

marblep

Catchafire - what a fab response. All the best to you and yours.

Your attitude to life is great.

BEVS

Hi there.
Did you sort out the PM business please? With 3 posts there shouldn't have been a problemo as it is an automatic BE facility.

I'd appreciate if you could let me know. Thanks.

marblep

Hey BEVS - sorry for the delay in replying. Sick child. And sick us.

PM is all good. Thanks heaps.

Marblep

BEVS

That's a relief . I'd have flagged it otherwise as it could have been a problem for others also.. Hope you are all feeling much better soon.