MrsFychan

well this was my 2 year thread:
Things started well, or was that rose tinted glasses.

MrF was already working when myself and the children arrived. Day after arrival MrF took us to see the rental he had booked which was not to clean lucky for us MIL had booked us in to the Museum Hotel for 3 nights as a Christmas present so we managed to get proper cleaners in. hubby took a few days off to show us around a bit.

We had our first earthquake within the first 2weeks of being here. Quakes take a while to get used to and can be scary but it's part and parcel of living here and you just have to hope for no big damaging ones

Within a few weeks I had got myself a part time position at After School Care, covering for the guy that MrF had stayed with who wanted time off to go be an extra in The Hobbitt. This arrangement went on longer than the management had agreed so I took over his role completely.
Kids seemed to settle into school well.
It was summer and things seemed to be going great.

Then Autumn came and the wind. The big UK storm in the UK saw a rather large branch through my bedroom window so I'm quite cautious about wind. But I never realised how frightened I actually am and having a metal roof doesn't help.

Anyway we bought a house in the area we rented within 6mths - now feel that was possibly a mistake, I love my house just wish I could pick it up and move it to a less windy area. The reason we bought so quickly was the rental was just awful and we had sold the house in the UK so had the funds but if I was advising any one I would say wait and rent in a few area's first before deciding on the area. We are looking at selling now and moving a bit more North and see if that helps, but that has bought it own stresses and we haven't even enlisted an agent yet.

Schooling for the kids started well but for my 10/11/12yr old soon found her bored. The Principal didn't really have an idea of which year to put her in, then I said she had befriended one girl of a similar age so she got put in with her. But as classes are mixed years it now appears that she could of still gone into that class and be in the upper year. Anyway last year nearing the end of Term 3 she mentioned she was bored and not learning anything. Knowing that she had stat tests and camp we decided to see what her results were and then discuss the options. Well her results were good so we contact the local college and asked if she could start there in 2014 rather than 2015. Which they agreed, so we had 5wks to get that sorted before the end of term 4. She is very exciting about it. As for my youngest he has fitted in well but then he only had reception and 1 term of UK education before he started here so he hasn't really known any other way of learning.

MrF has now got another job and last year I replaced the Head Supervisor of After School Care so I basically now run the place. (which I shall miss doing, despite its stresses if/when we move).

There are some problems with the school and how they manage things, think its more to do with the Principal and the BOT having no guts to get rid of them. Trying to find out who else you can complain to is a nightmare but I will keep complaining and hope we can get it sorted. It doesn't affect the sons education atm so no problems about that and if we move he will have to change schools anyway.

I wasn't unhappy in the UK, MrF was and although he still has the same work stresses he had in the UK he says he is happier here. Myself, well to be perfectly frank I live the same as I did in the UK, working part time, house work, shopping, etc. The kids have settled well and seem to be enjoying it. the main difference for them has been less after school clubs, but that's because of the work I do and not being able to get them to any. Also sports seem to be seasonal here so tennis is done in term 4 and 1 and not 2 or 3 ? Have managed to get son into swimming and basketball at weekends that run throughout the year but daughter hasn't wanted to join. she has taken up the piano and guitar at school and hopes to carry that on at college.

so was it worth it?

All in all it's had it's up's and down's but at the end of the day apart from the scenery being prettier than where we came from in the UK its much the same day to day stuff.
Things we were used to having easily in the UK sometimes takes more effort to obtain or you just go without. Choice is less here and some things are more expensive but it is what it is and has to be accepted or you could drive yourself round the bend.
We do do more together as a family, walks out (which MrF was reluctant to do in the UK) day trips, more social gatherings. But we seriously could of done that in the UK if we put some effort into it.

What would I do differently?

Not be so quick to buy. we thought it would be easier on the kids not to have to move again so quickly as they had made some friends. but if we move now those friendships are more established than back then so will it be harder on them now?

Where will we be at the 5yr anniversary?

I said we would stay for the 5yrs to get Citizenship and I will stick to that. Unless there are some unforeseen circumstances still in NZ but having serious talks as to whether we stay."
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Year 3

So we have now made the move North up to Kapiti Coast and must say things are lot more relaxed for us as a family. May also be because I have packed in the P/T job, the kids schooling seems to be better, DD has just finished her yr9 and came out with a merit, just shy of a excellence, with a distinction in French. A far cry from her previous school year of being bored and paying out for exercise books and them not being hardly touched.

We did lose money on the house sale and as I said previous would advise everyone to take their time over buying within the first two years. The house we have bought is a sensible house, not something you go "wow" over as we did the first house, it also did not have the double glazing and heat pumps like the first house but we have put glazing in the bedrooms and will see about the heating/air con maybe this year for next year. We paid over the odds for the house and it does need stuff doing on it but nothing that is urgen just things we would prefer to change but at the end of the day my health and sanity out weighed the money situation.
MrF has gone from a permanent position to a fixed term to enable the move which ends next Jan, so we will have to see what happens.

I am hoping to get another job but am a little restricted with the area we are in and the times I would ideally like to work but if not then a lot more dog walks and maybe I can shed some of this bloody weight I have gained since being here

Oh and another change that I don't think would of happened if we had not come over to NZ, I am no longer a red red so a little harder for BE members to spot me when I'm out and about, aye Moso

Still on for the 5 years and at this stage I am nearly at a stage that if things stay either on an even keel or improve I may stay on for a while after.

Snap Shot

Nice update. Glad to see your daughter is doing well at school. How is A ?

It won't be long until you have been in your house for a year - first anniversary of that.

We will have been in NZ for four years at the end of February.

moonie2011

Clappy

Thanks for the update. I always like hearing a balanced view regarding the experience of making the move.

MrsFychan

5 Year Update.

So made it to 5 years, with the help of some little white pills, so Citizenship is now on the needing to be done pile.

MrF was taken on full time in his contract role last year and has picked up a little contract work from a pass CEO of that company. He also been out and about as a speaker for a software company, he managed to get it to do things they were not aware it could be used for. Really don't ask me?, they did offer him a job but could not met the package he is on.
I did a Sales Person Licence course and passed in 2015, joined an agency - big mistake, the agency not the Licence, promised help and further training which in actual fact was worthless and office politics made it untenable and actually was part of the straw that broke the camels back and my start of anti depressants, things might of been different with 1 of the other 2 agencies that offered me work but will never know now.

Last May I got an Administration role with a local removal company,P/T, still waiting for my contract, which I have now been told to do myself by amending a previous one and then we can work on it to be relevant to me, never know may get it sorted before my year anniversary comes up. Lucky I pay the wages .
I have tried to implement some updates to the existing procedures to bring things into the 21st century, although been met with positives noises as yet not been done. But least I am more in my comfort zone with this type of work and a lot less office politics as its generally just me and a dog in the office.

Kids are both doing well now that they have changed school, the move has meant that life is generally less stressful so why the depression and lethargy came when it did and still continues is a mystery and still can affect family life unfortunately.

We've added another furry to the family, rescue Lowchen, dog, who despite being given as house trained is not and eats and chews everything, much to MrF's disdain, but he is a cutie and eases my conscious of one dog alone whilst I am at work 3 days a week.

As for how I have found people within in NZ,
been stabbed in the back by many people I first got to know when we first come over, also removed myself from a voluntary role as new chair came on board and was a male chauvinist and a liar, unfortunately I am not one to keep my mouth shout when I know someone is lying and I can prove it, especially if it means someone being put in the frame for something they have not done.
So in general I have come across a fair few Kiwi's that are not what they first appear to be and a few other people we met early have also proved to be less than first impressions.

I have a small group of friends that I can rely on and they know they can rely on me they also know if I can I will but if I can't I do not have a problem saying No.

I try and help out newcomers when I can/if they want it so they can avoid pit falls we fell into on arrival and I find this very rewarding, some have stayed friends and others have not but I am glad to help people to settle in. So if you are in the Wellington/Kapiti area and you want to met for a coffee feel free to pm me.

Not many improvements have happened on the house, got the kids some panel heaters for their bedrooms then bought ourselves a decent electric heater. Panel heaters have been fairly rubbish so will be getting the kids the same sort of heater we have.
Have extended the patio so we now have a decent entertainment area in the garden and MrF managed to persuade me to up the mortgage and buy a spa which actually has been well used, MrF has even put a TV and games console in the area so we can spa, watch films/TV/or game.
There was more important things in the house to be done long term, like heating and possibly retro glazing the remaining windows but the spa really has been worth while for us as a family.

So that's it really, we are looking to make a trip back to the UK in 2018/19 before the daughter starts further education and son starts college, so saving for that and hopefully will manage it.
What NZ has taught me is that we really didn't utilise the UK as we should of done. I never lived more that 15 miles from where I was born, we have seen more of NZ in the five years we have been here then we ever did of the UK, so I am hoping to not just go back to see family and friends but to see some of the UK whilst there.

bit of a ramble but there you go.

Woodlea

Lovely post - and congratulations on your anniversary!

Mishclark

I really enjoyed and appreciated your post, Mrs Fychan, honest and from the heart.

Michelle

MrsCakey

Thank you for such an honest post and well done for making such a milestone!

So interesting to hear your view on not buying so quickly. We have been discussing renting for 6 months first until we can find a house we love, and will consider renting longer to make sure we don't rush into anything. I think it's tempting to purchase quickly as you think that the children will settle easier and that you can start making your house a home (nesting). Something I know I'll definitely want to do.

I'm sorry to hear that you had such negative experiences with people, but I suppose that can apply to anywhere you live and not just to kiwis.

Not so good that you've had to go on the white pills either, but I'm glad you got help and that it's helping you now.

I thought your year 1 comment was fascinating "well to be perfectly frank I live the same as I did in the UK, working part time, house work, shopping, etc." I do wonder if we sometimes put too much pressure on ourselves and have expectations that can't be met.

Anyway, we are moving to the BoP, but I've always loved Wellington, so would have totally met up for a cuppa with you if we had the chance