hottoddy

I suppose N.Z being one of the most further places from the U.K that most British Expats will visit the U.K less than they would like.My reasons for this comment is being when it comes to a friend or loved ones death and maybe there will be added regrets of being so far away and little time spent.

Shirrom

I guess we should have some sort of savings for last minute flights in this case? It's not as if these sort of tragedies happen all the time so they shouldn't stop us living our life's.

hottoddy

No i agree these sort of tragedies happen only once in a persons life

Genesis

I came here to start a new life, the old UK one was over. I never moved here with any intention to visit the UK at all once I had left. My ex was the one who wanted to. I left behind family and friends I both loved and cared about but one has to live one's life as one sees fit.

Sometimes we make choices that interfere with our every day lives, like emigrating. As they say you can't make omlettes without breaking eggs.

Weddings have been missed and much more besides as a result of me living here, I have absolutely no regrets (for me or my 3 children) at all about not being able to get back for anything pressing in the UK.

I guess I am just very pragmatic about it. Personally, if I got ill or even died, I neither expect (or want) any close friends or relatives to come visit me.

I would much rather they come over when I am not ill and alive, but they don't and why should they? We all move on, we all have very, very different lives and expectations.

hottoddy

Your comment sounds a kinda final breakaway and so radical.But i suppose if it works best for you that way why not.?

Catchafire

So, what would YOUR point of view be then Toddy? Do you have some experience living in NZ? Some of your posts have the whiff of "schadenfreude" about them.

For what its worth, my position is pretty much the same as Genesis.

MrsFychan

It is what it is, nowt you can do about unless you have heaps of money. If you emigrate this far then what do you expect?

escapedtonz

My Mrs had all the intentions of always retaining sufficient funds in savings just in case we needed to go back. I, on the other hand wasn't really interested. Once I'd made the move I had no intention of going back for many years, if at all.
We kept this money for around 4 years, however, now we are building our own home that extravagance is being used. We do have some savings that could be used for a ticket home, however in truth that money is for the house and if we did have to buy a ticket home we'd just slap it on the credit card and pay it off on our return.
My Mrs also wanted to maintain between $5-10k more for a UK holiday after 3 or so years living here to see how she truly felt about going back.
That trip was done last year (September 2015) so that money is gone and after 3 weeks of a great time with family/friends back in the UK we were very glad to come back 'home'.
So, the little savings we have left after buying our section, deposits for the house build and all the other usual sundry items we can possibly push to two return tickets and some spends but that's about it (there's 4 of us) and the further time goes on the less those savings get since we are paying rent and mortgage now. Hopefully we'll get to slowly replenish that emergency travel fund when we move in to our new home but who am I kidding, we'll have a new home to furnish, a new garden to plant and landscape and a pool to build.
Years ago we made a conscious decision to only go back for very close family AND only one person and maybe one child go back - so in case of problems with parents, siblings/partners/children as otherwise we just couldn't afford it. We have missed a number of family weddings and funerals but we are pretty happy with that decision so far.
We'll just take every day as it comes and cross that bridge when we need to.

hottoddy

i have no experience of living in NZ.But you think my post have the whiff of "schadenfreude"? Shall i tell you why i posted this thread i have just returned from England after burying my dearly beloved mother she really is a tremendous deep loss.

Pollyana

Depends how many friends and relatives you have. i had to make the trip formy Dad, one day I will have to do it for my mum.

Condolences on your loss.

hottoddy

No sorry i was meaning a person can only die once.My strange sense of black humor.Thank you for your Condolences it has indeed been a great loss

hottoddy

What would i expect? probably homesickness.

hottoddy

A very down to earth read in my opinion.Kinda made me feel at home like the saying your home is where your heart is.Or in the case of many N.Z people your cannabis patch.Only joking, my strange sense of humor again

Catchafire

Yawn.

Kotare

My wife is currently back for her Mother's funeral, but at the end of the day it is merely a social gathering of the extended family. Fortunately she saw her Mother in May.

If funds permit great - if not I suggest spending on the NZ family ie kids if appropriate is much more important.