Single mum of 2 looking to move to NL
Jul 28th 2015, 4:14 am
#16
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Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 35
Re: Single mum of 2 looking to move to NL
The work/life balance is definitely better here. I am a year in, with a 12 and 10 year old and the quality of life for them is way better. My husband's bosses tell him to go home and be with his family if he is putting too many hours in - something that would never happen in the UK!
My kids eat a packed lunch at school. There is a total lack of after school activities actually at school but there are lots of things you can arrange yourself.
I'm in the Rotterdam area so can't advise on the areas you are talking about. My husband came out here with a job so I can't help on the job situation either
My kids eat a packed lunch at school. There is a total lack of after school activities actually at school but there are lots of things you can arrange yourself.
I'm in the Rotterdam area so can't advise on the areas you are talking about. My husband came out here with a job so I can't help on the job situation either
Jul 28th 2015, 6:43 pm
#17
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Joined: Jul 2015
Location: London
Posts: 20
Re: Single mum of 2 looking to move to NL
The work/life balance is definitely better here. I am a year in, with a 12 and 10 year old and the quality of life for them is way better. My husband's bosses tell him to go home and be with his family if he is putting too many hours in - something that would never happen in the UK!
My kids eat a packed lunch at school. There is a total lack of after school activities actually at school but there are lots of things you can arrange yourself.
I'm in the Rotterdam area so can't advise on the areas you are talking about. My husband came out here with a job so I can't help on the job situation either
My kids eat a packed lunch at school. There is a total lack of after school activities actually at school but there are lots of things you can arrange yourself.
I'm in the Rotterdam area so can't advise on the areas you are talking about. My husband came out here with a job so I can't help on the job situation either
Jul 30th 2015, 7:31 pm
#18
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Joined: Jan 2012
Location: Noord Holland
Posts: 568
Re: Single mum of 2 looking to move to NL
so far no one has said DON'T DO IT! - so i'm thinking that I'm not being unrealistic
Nobody will tell you that. But most will say make sure that you are being realistic. Your own children will tell you if you made a success of it or ruined their lives, when they reach their teens
Would I have done it as a single parent, leaving regular work for an uncertain future with mouths to feed? Not a chance. It might be easy to find work here when you're in your early twenties, and much less so if you're pushing 30 or older, with kids in tow, unless you have a solid, highly educated profession. it's common for people to work 32 hours (4 days), but everyone wants Wednesdays free, so most jobs where they are rather desperate will require you to work Wednesdays.....
Schooling. How old are the children. At 4-7, they will have Wednesday afternoon free every week, and possibly Friday afternoon too. 7-12, every Wednesday afternoon free. As you see, paying for lunchtime supervision (around 40 euros per month per child) is chickenfeed. I'm not even mentioning school holidays. Don't expect 'free education' to be as free as the UK. They don't do fundraising via school fetes and jumble sales - expect a bill annually for extras (from book deposits and art supplies, to school trips and holidays) for each child. In addition, their schoolmates are unlikely to speak anything more than basic (TV) English and swear words until the last year at primary, which could leave your children feeling isolated, depending on their own language-learning-speed and temperament. The tests they take at 12 are entirely in Dutch, and their entire future (their opportunity to reach university) will depend on it - so be realistic about the times needed for them to catch up to their classmates.
I won't tell you it will be easy, because even with a generous budget, it's going to be a hell of a job to do it without support - giving up any existing support network you have in Britain. But it is your decision. I would seriously advise you that, should you want to leave the UK, look to countries where language won't be an immediate and almost unsurpassable barrier to employment
Nobody will tell you that. But most will say make sure that you are being realistic. Your own children will tell you if you made a success of it or ruined their lives, when they reach their teens
Would I have done it as a single parent, leaving regular work for an uncertain future with mouths to feed? Not a chance. It might be easy to find work here when you're in your early twenties, and much less so if you're pushing 30 or older, with kids in tow, unless you have a solid, highly educated profession. it's common for people to work 32 hours (4 days), but everyone wants Wednesdays free, so most jobs where they are rather desperate will require you to work Wednesdays.....Schooling. How old are the children. At 4-7, they will have Wednesday afternoon free every week, and possibly Friday afternoon too. 7-12, every Wednesday afternoon free. As you see, paying for lunchtime supervision (around 40 euros per month per child) is chickenfeed. I'm not even mentioning school holidays. Don't expect 'free education' to be as free as the UK. They don't do fundraising via school fetes and jumble sales - expect a bill annually for extras (from book deposits and art supplies, to school trips and holidays) for each child. In addition, their schoolmates are unlikely to speak anything more than basic (TV) English and swear words until the last year at primary, which could leave your children feeling isolated, depending on their own language-learning-speed and temperament. The tests they take at 12 are entirely in Dutch, and their entire future (their opportunity to reach university) will depend on it - so be realistic about the times needed for them to catch up to their classmates.
I won't tell you it will be easy, because even with a generous budget, it's going to be a hell of a job to do it without support - giving up any existing support network you have in Britain. But it is your decision. I would seriously advise you that, should you want to leave the UK, look to countries where language won't be an immediate and almost unsurpassable barrier to employment
Last edited by Red_Wine_Fairy; Jul 30th 2015 at 7:35 pm.
Jul 30th 2015, 8:45 pm
#19
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Joined: Jul 2015
Location: London
Posts: 20
Re: Single mum of 2 looking to move to NL
so far no one has said DON'T DO IT! - so i'm thinking that I'm not being unrealistic
Nobody will tell you that. But most will say make sure that you are being realistic. Your own children will tell you if you made a success of it or ruined their lives, when they reach their teens Would I have done it as a single parent, leaving regular work for an uncertain future with mouths to feed? Not a chance. It might be easy to find work here when you're in your early twenties, and much less so if you're pushing 30 or older, with kids in tow, unless you have a solid, highly educated profession. it's common for people to work 32 hours (4 days), but everyone wants Wednesdays free, so most jobs where they are rather desperate will require you to work Wednesdays.....
Schooling. How old are the children. At 4-7, they will have Wednesday afternoon free every week, and possibly Friday afternoon too. 7-12, every Wednesday afternoon free. As you see, paying for lunchtime supervision (around 40 euros per month per child) is chickenfeed. I'm not even mentioning school holidays. Don't expect 'free education' to be as free as the UK. They don't do fundraising via school fetes and jumble sales - expect a bill annually for extras (from book deposits and art supplies, to school trips and holidays) for each child. In addition, their schoolmates are unlikely to speak anything more than basic (TV) English and swear words until the last year at primary, which could leave your children feeling isolated, depending on their own language-learning-speed and temperament. The tests they take at 12 are entirely in Dutch, and their entire future (their opportunity to reach university) will depend on it - so be realistic about the times needed for them to catch up to their classmates.
I won't tell you it will be easy, because even with a generous budget, it's going to be a hell of a job to do it without support - giving up any existing support network you have in Britain. But it is your decision. I would seriously advise you that, should you want to leave the UK, look to countries where language won't be an immediate and almost unsurpassable barrier to employment
Nobody will tell you that. But most will say make sure that you are being realistic. Your own children will tell you if you made a success of it or ruined their lives, when they reach their teens
Would I have done it as a single parent, leaving regular work for an uncertain future with mouths to feed? Not a chance. It might be easy to find work here when you're in your early twenties, and much less so if you're pushing 30 or older, with kids in tow, unless you have a solid, highly educated profession. it's common for people to work 32 hours (4 days), but everyone wants Wednesdays free, so most jobs where they are rather desperate will require you to work Wednesdays.....Schooling. How old are the children. At 4-7, they will have Wednesday afternoon free every week, and possibly Friday afternoon too. 7-12, every Wednesday afternoon free. As you see, paying for lunchtime supervision (around 40 euros per month per child) is chickenfeed. I'm not even mentioning school holidays. Don't expect 'free education' to be as free as the UK. They don't do fundraising via school fetes and jumble sales - expect a bill annually for extras (from book deposits and art supplies, to school trips and holidays) for each child. In addition, their schoolmates are unlikely to speak anything more than basic (TV) English and swear words until the last year at primary, which could leave your children feeling isolated, depending on their own language-learning-speed and temperament. The tests they take at 12 are entirely in Dutch, and their entire future (their opportunity to reach university) will depend on it - so be realistic about the times needed for them to catch up to their classmates.
I won't tell you it will be easy, because even with a generous budget, it's going to be a hell of a job to do it without support - giving up any existing support network you have in Britain. But it is your decision. I would seriously advise you that, should you want to leave the UK, look to countries where language won't be an immediate and almost unsurpassable barrier to employment
Thanks for that R_W_F, everyone needs a dose of reality. I do worry about my kids getting on at school - but I have never been worried about them picking up the language. I just assumed that being young would give them the time necessary. I was more concerned about cultural and attitude differences.
I live in a high immigrant area in the UK and we have kids older than mine with no English pick up the language so quickly and their parents can barely say a word - so thanks for making me consider that possibility.
I think sometimes you have to take a chance if you genuinely believe it is for the betterment of your family. As it happens living in London means that your support are so far away you barely see them anyway and the amount of support you can lend each other is limited due to time and stress and money.
Working full time I am used to spending a huge amount of money on breakfast and afterschool care and although we do a lot of school fundraising, being one of the better off (compared to some of the parents that are really struggling) I am constantly having to pay for additional things - not books but all trips and uniforms and anything else they can think to sting us for.
I think I am coming to the conclusion that rather than moving lock stock and barrel, renting for a year and reassessing at the end of it, might be a good idea?!
I have been thinking about it for two years - its definitely not something I would rush into.
Can I ask what bought you to NL? Are you glad you made the move? Do you speak Dutch and have Dutch friends?
Thanks
SN
