rebeccajo

But I'm the yank! We say tid-bit!

dunroving

I know, just teasing.

Over the years I have used perfectly innocent "English" words in the US and got very odd looks because over there they mean something more "naughty" (that's one that always raises a smile over there when I use it in class because it has something to do with rubber and spanking, or something like that ...)

rebeccajo

Husband and I were out in the car yesterday. Drove past a neon sign at the local VFW that proclaimed South Carolina style "shag dance" to be held on Saturday night, January 25th..............

dunroving

Ah yes, you remind me of all those NC singles ads: "... good sense of humor, likes to shag ..."

islandwoman120

My first serious job in the US circa 1987 was at the sign of the golden arches in Florida, as an assistant restaurant manager. I was able to immortalise myself by telling the high school staff to 'go out the back and have your fags'... it took a brave young girl to explain to me what I had said that caused so much mirth!

holly_1948

I would endorse the view that, with the recent changes on the rules on "habitual residence" you do need to find somewhere really inexpensive to live for at least the first three months. And I submit that is not likely to be in Hampshire or the South East.

A single childless woman should not find it difficult to obtain something. Heck, there is probably someone here on the forum who would take you in for that long. Especially if you do housework (no double entendre is intended)

Wherever you land, even if it's only for a couple of weeks, be sure to get yourself onto the electoral roll quickly.
There is no point of applying for council housing until habitually resident (three months in the locality or British and formally employed in the locality).

not2old

what I've learned from reading the experiences of folks on BE as well as looking through the volumes of information on the GOV.UK as well as the quango websites is exactly that what you pointed out Holly.

On landing back, get settled in , on the electoral roles, bank, inexpensive accommodation, utility bills in your name even a library card, a provisional drivers licence (if you don't have one of the old ones).

Shows intent you're in to stay permanently - after that if its what you want, an application for social housing if you qualify.

Englishmaple

Holly re: finding work - I think that's one of the really big fears that's holding me back from actually making the move (apart from feeling generally overwhelmed at the moment) ... I really don't know how employers are going to view my disability and I'm worried that, if I try and apply for work which doesn't involve a computer - like retail or caring or some kind of "survival job" as they call them in Canada - that an employer will take one look at my resume and say "you're overqualified" and rule me out. And, if I apply for professional work that my age will count against me and/or when I start asking for an ergonomic work set-up/ accommodation the employer will be put off employing me.

Re: cleaning - I could do that but I don't know how long my body would hold up doing it - I had a friend who did it and she said it was very hard on the body. Similarly, I've also heard that other kinds of work like certain retail jobs and call centre work can also trigger repetitive strain injuries or exacerbate them.

Believe me I've tried so many things to try and get things better - it's gone on for 7 years now. The most helpful thing has been personal training - particularly working with small hand weights - trying to build up my upper body strength as well as doing weight bearing exercises to improve my core strength -but, even this hasn't completely resolved everything to the point where I can comfortably use a computer for hours on end in a professional job. I only started weights last July (when I finally got some settlement money from my ex) and have made some progress and continue to work on it by myself but I don't know how long it will take to make more significant progress or whether it will resolve things completely .. I try to stay positive but it's hard.

So that's one big fear that I haven't quite figured out how to address - if I stay in Canada, I could get a survival job but I don't like where I live and I don't know whether living in Edmonton would be much better (from what Editha wrote, it doesn't sound like friendships are anymore substantial there). I have been told it's easier to get a social services job there but there's also the 6 month winters I'm not sure I could do - the plummeting temperatures in Ontario recently were quite hard and I can't imagine what it would be like to have 6 months of it.

The thing is, I do have some money from the settlement - quite a generous amount actually but it's not enough to retire on or work p/t and draw from. And it was done on the basis that it was money towards a pension - so I can't make any further claims on my ex's estate with respect to pension money (and I wouldn't want to).

However, having read around, it's nowhere near enough for a basic retirement - If I stay in Canada, I need to work f/t and save around $150,000 in the next 15-20 years in order to have a basic retirement (I haven't looked into how much I'd have to save if I went back to the UK). And I'm talking basic here - like food in my belly and a roof over my head and utilities paid - not a gold plated lifestyle by any means.

So one of my big big fears with moving back to the UK if I can't get work, is that I end up exhausting what I've been given in the settlement and then end up very very poor and hungry on benefits. Whereas in Canada I could get a survival job - but that wouldn't be easy to live on long-term either (sigh) - although, hopefully, I would continue to get some spousal support from my ex (which I would have to save as much as possible towards a pension).

I know it's hard to know how things will turn out before I move but my memories from living in the UK is that it's quite hard to get work once you get older - that older workers aren't viewed as attractive or employable by employers - does this still hold true?

Re: the olive oil tip - I could try that (I've tried so many things) - traditionally in Ayurveda (the sister science of yoga) oil massage is helpful for the joints and general health and I've used non-toasted sesame oil on my own joints in the past (though not every day) - it's messy to do but I find I sleep better after an oil massage. If you're curious, there's a little bit here:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abhyangha

http://www.yogahealer.com/the-benefi...edic-abhyanga/

Englishmaple

Islandwoman - did you choose an area of the UK to live in temporarily and then move to your preferred location? or did you just choose an area and move and decide it would work?

I was thinking of moving back to the Cheltenham area but I've just had another very heated conversation with my parents and I really think I would be better to live in another area - some distance away. Haven't figure where would be best with respect to employment prospects though ?

islandwoman120

I found that I had changed so much in the many years I was in the US that I no longer had any commonalities with people I used to know in the UK, so I chose to go out on my own. I decided to live in Somerset simply because I had visited it and thought it very beautiful! I found a Housing 21 place in Coleford, went on the waiting list for that, and in the meantime found a bedsitter in Frome, which is 4 miles away and the closest place with large shops and modern conveniences. But as it turned out it also has a lot of anti-social behaviour and that made me very uncomfortable, so I was directed to sheltered housing in Frome, where I stayed for 18 months, then I came on down to Devon almost 2 years ago. It is very different here in comparison to Frome - some days I am content with my choice, some days I miss my friends in Frome. If you read my older postings you will see the various thoughts I had on moving back v staying here in Devon. It boils down to friends and artistic pursuits. I now have local friends and that makes a huge difference to daily living as you can imagine. The artistic pursuits are still missing, and I have been directed to Totnes as the closest place with 'interesting people'....but Exeter is closer and there are many 'interesting people' there too.

You may well be suited to a large city such as Bath or Exeter if you choose the SouthWest. Commuting is easy as public transport is good - I am in a town with mainline rail service and a bus to Exeter every 20 minutes. You have been away for a while and your family have stayed put, you have had your own experiences, plus you are an adult and make your own decisions and live your own life. My personal experience of my direct family is that we would argue too much if we lived close to each other, but there are other people who could not live without close proximity to their family. You are the only person who knows how that works for you. PM me if you have questions I can answer.

paul32x

You only use a relatively small amount -- a little of the stuff goes a long way -- so I tend to leave it, apart from on my hands. It was the joints in my hands and elbows that were the main problem so I'd sit and rub it in for 15 or 20 minutes, so most of it had been absorbed by then.

Editha

I think you may right that there is more ageism in employment in the UK than Canada. That is the impression my husband got when he was job-hunting in both countries at the age of 54, and he did find a job in Canada in the end, although to be fair, he was interviewed for jobs in the UK too.

Nonetheless, I think you'd be mad to come to Alberta to do a grunt job. That's just masochism. You'd be better off skint and unemployed in the UK.

holly_1948

I think there is lots of ageism everywhere to tell the truth.

Englishmaple - if it is not too prying to ask - did you become a Canadian citizen? If the question is too intrusive that's OK. But it does colour options.

As to initial living in Britain, I think the thing is to live anywhere that is very inexpensive, does not involve (much) up front money or commitment and be ready to move to wherever the job is once hired. Doesn't really matter very much where it is provided you drive (as long as there is a place to keep the car). How about South Wales? Cheap and not a million miles from Cheltenham.

I counsel against applying (only) for jobs that do not require your professional qualifications and expertise. Aim high, apply for jobs you really want but think you have little chance of getting regardless of the location. Even if its for a librarian on the Isle of Skye (just kidding about Skye). I would not mention limitations like repetitive stress injury (or whatever its called) until at a face to face interview. Not in writing, not on the telephone.

If it were I, I would apply for jobs while still in Canada, and mention "I will be over for a visit in two months' time" or whatever, even if it's not true, you can make it true if the right opportunity drops into your lap.

islandwoman120

Here's the link to the Isle of Skye - I'd gladly move to Scotland if there were more trees! http://www.skye.co.uk/
I even looked at the Isle of Bute: http://www.visitbute.com/

I'm getting ready for some adventuring this spring and summer, and Scotland is at the top of the list.

Englishmaple

Yes I am a Canadian citizen Holly. And yes I am thinking of applying for jobs back n the UK while I'm in Canada although I don't know how much luck I'll have. I get your point about not mentioning RSI until the employer is interested - my main issue (aside from ageism) if I was to try and get back into library work would be how to search databases quickly using voice recognition software. It's good for writing things but I don't know how good it is for searching things .. but anyway I definitely am going to look into applying for UK jobs.

At the moment I'm still also trying to whittle down my belongings - it's taking far longer than I thought it would and I don't have that much stuff to begin with! But I keep looking at the size of the single rooms to rent in the UK and realising I have to let go and let go and let go of more and more stuff. This is useful for me to do anyway as even if I stay in Canada and move somewhere else I will have to live lightly - I can't afford to continue to rent an apartment by myself - it's just too expensive for me.

BTW I'd love a library job on Skye! It's a beautiful place!

I have a friend who lives in Worcestershire and I have been debating about moving to somewhere in the Midlands as it's fairly centrally located in terms of moving to somewhere else to get work. I have lived in Birmingham (in the early '90's) but I didn't care for it that much (apologies to any Brummies on this board!). I've also lived up North in Newcastle and Sheffield as well as various places in the South. Really I was just trying to figure out where would be a good place to move where I could most likely pick up some work quite easily ...I did think of London but I know the rents there are expensive.

Thanks for all your support on this board though - the whole thing has been so overwhelming particularly on top of various illnesses and my marriage ending ...