Feeling sad/homesick after 11 years
#16
Re: Feeling sad/homesick after 11 years
I must just be lucky as I read about this friends issue a lot on here and I have the same "level" of friends as I have in England. Some are Canadian and some are British. I have some really really good friends who are incidentally the Canadians, who I know I can always call on and feel totally at ease with. We do a whole ton of stuff together. I also have acquaintances.
I have the same in England.
It took some time though and no pushing at all as I refuse to ingratiate myself on anyone. In my view it took many years to make deep friendships in England and it takes the same here.
I hope all those missing those types of friendships here get them soon.
As for homesickness... I have come to realise I sometimes have nostalgia-sickness. I miss the Sussex of my childhood with all the memories that come with it.
I have the same in England.
It took some time though and no pushing at all as I refuse to ingratiate myself on anyone. In my view it took many years to make deep friendships in England and it takes the same here.
I hope all those missing those types of friendships here get them soon.
As for homesickness... I have come to realise I sometimes have nostalgia-sickness. I miss the Sussex of my childhood with all the memories that come with it.
#17
Re: Feeling sad/homesick after 11 years
I must just be lucky as I read about this friends issue a lot on here and I have the same "level" of friends as I have in England. Some are Canadian and some are British. I have some really really good friends who are incidentally the Canadians, who I know I can always call on and feel totally at ease with. We do a whole ton of stuff together. I also have acquaintances.
I have the same in England.
It took some time though and no pushing at all as I refuse to ingratiate myself on anyone. In my view it took many years to make deep friendships in England and it takes the same here.
I hope all those missing those types of friendships here get them soon.
As for homesickness... I have come to realise I sometimes have nostalgia-sickness. I miss the Sussex of my childhood with all the memories that come with it.
I have the same in England.
It took some time though and no pushing at all as I refuse to ingratiate myself on anyone. In my view it took many years to make deep friendships in England and it takes the same here.
I hope all those missing those types of friendships here get them soon.
As for homesickness... I have come to realise I sometimes have nostalgia-sickness. I miss the Sussex of my childhood with all the memories that come with it.
I'm not giving up, I'll join the PTA if necessary!!!
#18
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Feb 2013
Location: BC, Canada
Posts: 3,874
Re: Feeling sad/homesick after 11 years
I must just be lucky as I read about this friends issue a lot on here and I have the same "level" of friends as I have in England. Some are Canadian and some are British. I have some really really good friends who are incidentally the Canadians, who I know I can always call on and feel totally at ease with. We do a whole ton of stuff together. I also have acquaintances.
I have the same in England.
It took some time though and no pushing at all as I refuse to ingratiate myself on anyone. In my view it took many years to make deep friendships in England and it takes the same here.
I hope all those missing those types of friendships here get them soon.
As for homesickness... I have come to realise I sometimes have nostalgia-sickness. I miss the Sussex of my childhood with all the memories that come with it.
I have the same in England.
It took some time though and no pushing at all as I refuse to ingratiate myself on anyone. In my view it took many years to make deep friendships in England and it takes the same here.
I hope all those missing those types of friendships here get them soon.
As for homesickness... I have come to realise I sometimes have nostalgia-sickness. I miss the Sussex of my childhood with all the memories that come with it.
I'm the same as you ......... have many friends, of all nationalities. We've never had problems making friends ...... some happened quickly, others took years to develop into deep friendships.
I sometimes find myself thinking about the moors of Lancashire, or places in Yorkshire ............... but I appreciate that that is nostalgia. Those places have mostly changed almost beyond recognition.
I can honestly say that I have never been homesick .............. I prefer to think of what is around the next corner rather than looking back!
#19
Re: Feeling sad/homesick after 11 years
Most are born Canadians, but some are Fillipina immigrants, some Chinese immigrants and some Syrian.
I am actually pretty antisocial and like to keep people at arms length, but that and not having friends seems to have been a bit impossible here as in the nicest possible way people don't take no for an answer . Perhaps it is a Maritime thing?
People here in PEI always say everyone else in Canada is antisocial and unfriendly but I pooh poohed it a bit as I thought it was "The Island Mentality" at work again.
#20
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Feb 2013
Location: BC, Canada
Posts: 3,874
Re: Feeling sad/homesick after 11 years
I was wondering whether it was easier to make friends in the Maritimes. We haven't been in Canada a year yet and have plenty of friends, including some very close ones who I feel we could rely on when the chips are down.
Most are born Canadians, but some are Fillipina immigrants, some Chinese immigrants and some Syrian.
I am actually pretty antisocial and like to keep people at arms length, but that and not having friends seems to have been a bit impossible here as in the nicest possible way people don't take no for an answer . Perhaps it is a Maritime thing?
People here in PEI always say everyone else in Canada is antisocial and unfriendly but I pooh poohed it a bit as I thought it was "The Island Mentality" at work again.
Most are born Canadians, but some are Fillipina immigrants, some Chinese immigrants and some Syrian.
I am actually pretty antisocial and like to keep people at arms length, but that and not having friends seems to have been a bit impossible here as in the nicest possible way people don't take no for an answer . Perhaps it is a Maritime thing?
People here in PEI always say everyone else in Canada is antisocial and unfriendly but I pooh poohed it a bit as I thought it was "The Island Mentality" at work again.
TBH .... I think a lot has to do with how "you" the immigrant reacts to the people already living here.
We're in big city Vancouver, and have had no problems making friends since day one, which was almost 49 years ago. We're still making new friends!
If someone keeps telling a "native" how bad their country is and how one can't get this that or the other from "back home" and "why not?" ... then the reaction is not going to be friendly.
I'm not talking about the complaints people post on this site ........... I'm talking about those who say it loud on the street, on the bus or at bbqs.
The Aussies used to have a phrase for those Brits who behaved like that down there in the 50s and 60s.
#21
Re: Feeling sad/homesick after 11 years
TBH .... I think a lot has to do with how "you" the immigrant reacts to the people already living here....
If someone keeps telling a "native" how bad their country is and how one can't get this that or the other from "back home" and "why not?" ... then the reaction is not going to be friendly...
If someone keeps telling a "native" how bad their country is and how one can't get this that or the other from "back home" and "why not?" ... then the reaction is not going to be friendly...
My main beef in Canada has always been this if it ain't broke don't fix it approach to something that either is broke or never worked in the first place.
My wife and mother in law always marvelled at the good things of the UK without telling me to bugger off back there.
Weird that I'm feeling somewhat ashamed of the UK right now
#22
Re: Feeling sad/homesick after 11 years
Hello, I'm not sure what to do or if I have a problem but recently I visited the UK again.
Now I feel like I want to go back last time I didn't feel this way (I was living in Newfoundland at the time)
Now I have a good life here in Ottawa (moved a couple of years ago) but it seems the people here are much of the banter type and I really miss the UK banter.
I'm married too but I really just feel like I want to shut up shop and go back to UK after 11 years in Canada.
Anyone else ever feel like this and got some advice?
Now I feel like I want to go back last time I didn't feel this way (I was living in Newfoundland at the time)
Now I have a good life here in Ottawa (moved a couple of years ago) but it seems the people here are much of the banter type and I really miss the UK banter.
I'm married too but I really just feel like I want to shut up shop and go back to UK after 11 years in Canada.
Anyone else ever feel like this and got some advice?
11 years here you say & you want to move back to the UK because you miss the UK banter?
Well it's an easy choice isn't it - pack your bags & move back to the UK, but before doing so 'remember why you left the UK in the first place'
#23
Re: Feeling sad/homesick after 11 years
Since your OP on May 31st you are probably back to normal by now - if not, then, here it comes at you FWIW
11 years here you say & you want to move back to the UK because you miss the UK banter?
Well it's an easy choice isn't it - pack your bags & move back to the UK, but before doing so 'remember why you left the UK in the first place'
11 years here you say & you want to move back to the UK because you miss the UK banter?
Well it's an easy choice isn't it - pack your bags & move back to the UK, but before doing so 'remember why you left the UK in the first place'
#24
Re: Feeling sad/homesick after 11 years
B-1 domestic servant probably, there are some other domestic servant categories for servants accompanying people on A or G visas. You have to have been employed by the person prior to coming to the US.
Anyway, Ryerson University did a study into how long immigrants spend in Canada and their conclusion was 50% left in 10 years or less.
My experience is that people come over, get through the first winter, then when the second winter hits they realize it's like that every year and then they either stick it our or leave. By 10 years, the novelty has long since worn off and that's the point where people look at the situation objectively.
On the rare occasions I got homesick for the UK I used to go to Vancouver or Victoria because they're so British-like. But honestly I never really got that homesick. I used to get really homesick for the US though. Kind of worn off over the years.
Anyway, Ryerson University did a study into how long immigrants spend in Canada and their conclusion was 50% left in 10 years or less.
My experience is that people come over, get through the first winter, then when the second winter hits they realize it's like that every year and then they either stick it our or leave. By 10 years, the novelty has long since worn off and that's the point where people look at the situation objectively.
On the rare occasions I got homesick for the UK I used to go to Vancouver or Victoria because they're so British-like. But honestly I never really got that homesick. I used to get really homesick for the US though. Kind of worn off over the years.
#26
Re: Feeling sad/homesick after 11 years
My point is a lot of people leave after 2-3 years because they can't hack the winter and then even if they can put up with it, by 10 years apparently 50% of people have had it.
#27
Re: Feeling sad/homesick after 11 years
I went back to the UK just recently - first time in 15 years - for a 2-week vacation.
Crowded, cramped, dirty, noisy, smelly, expensive - and that was just the Gatwick arrivals hall!
After landing back at YEG during a Sunday sunset, I climbed aboard my big-ass pickup to hit the Anthony Henday and thought, "It's nice to be home".
Crowded, cramped, dirty, noisy, smelly, expensive - and that was just the Gatwick arrivals hall!
After landing back at YEG during a Sunday sunset, I climbed aboard my big-ass pickup to hit the Anthony Henday and thought, "It's nice to be home".
#28
Re: Feeling sad/homesick after 11 years
We have just had three weeks of relatives - if everyone in England is as miserable and complainy as these 3 were then there is no way I could move back now - and that is after years of flip flopping on where we need to move too!
#30
Re: Feeling sad/homesick after 11 years
Probably crap television, crappy cheese, the price of groceries, the superficiality of Canadians, rank frozen beer, no marmite, Winters, Summers, the size of Canada...need I go on?
Last edited by Stinkypup; Aug 15th 2017 at 2:55 am.