feelbritish

Hi yes looked at it a while back and again today but it is not very active. The Island forum has had no new details since 2013. To be honest a lot of the people on there and here in our valley are Afrikaans descent and hated the English as much as everything else plus they also have nothing nice to say about SA or its politics and I find their negativity disturbing! Most of them were forced to leave due to no jobs and fear of their future and no real connection to Europe like a lot of us did have. SA has a very complicated history I have some friends, one Scottish, one English and a couple from South Africa. The ones from SA have settled nicely into life here having brought their entire families over. I sometimes meet up with them. It is the Canadians I find hard to get that "real" friend with. I have a few acquaintances (ones that have traveled extensively) and like them very much but I am always the one making the contact! Gets a bit tiring. My main problem is I do not like the winter and get depressed! Hopefully will be remedying that starting Dec this year!

Rosie Lee

Plus 1.

Sunryder

Hi Feelbritish, we haven't been here long enough to make friends with anyone yet, we only landed on 6th December 2014. We are originally from Zim, moved to SA, then UK and now here. To be honest, we do have a giggle because where we came from in the UK the British were the same, we never really made any good friends in 14 years, only with one family really, the rest was "skin deep". Oh we got on with all the neighbours etc. and had parties and BBQ's etc. but there was never that strong friendship connection. Most of the neighbours had lived in that community for 20 - 30 years and it was kind of hard to fit in. But the British complain about the same thing here, so I guess its each to their own. I know what you mean about the real Afrikaans people, we faced that in SA too, although we did make good friends there and we still keep in regular contact with our SA friends. Luckily here we have family so hopefully it won't be too bad. Once we are settled we will try and join clubs and see what happens. Its more difficult now because our kids are grown up so we won't get the connections that you usually do from their activities. My eldest plays rugby and cricket so hopefully he will get into some clubs around here and make friends that way.
Where abouts in SA are you from? We lived in Durban, it was great in the 80's. I don't think so now though.

xxdb

Wow it shocks me to find myself on the opposite side. My take is you *can* have a decent conversation with people, though it takes a while to get to know them. You absolutely cannot, however, have a controversial conversation with someone you've just met and it's 50/50 if you joke around with someone you've just met whether they'll have a sour face or not. On the other hand, sometimes you can. The other day there were two young lads in home depot helping me with some stuff, loading it onto my truck. The one young lad had a sense of humour and joked around the same way I did whereas the other one had a deer in the headlights what's happening look to him. We also do have friends who are genuine people and who are both Canadian. That said, the vast majority of Canadians we meet socially are basically socially retarded. House parties are the best for that - you go to a house party full of Canadians and oftentimes nobody talks to you and when you try to strike up a conversation you get a shocked look. The hilarious thing is that Canadians do it to each other too. Our neighbour, an elderly lady was invited to our neighbour on the other side's party (as were we) and it was impossible to strike up a conversation. Our old lady friend said the same thing. That actually made me feel better - it pointed out that the party goers were just ignorant idiots instead of singling my wife and I out. Anyway, after a certain amount of time you just get used to not socializing very much. If we went back home (and it's on the card unless things get better economically) we'd probably not go out much because we've just gotten used to doing our own thing.

feelbritish

I am originally from Cape Town but also lived in Durban during the 80's, probably the best time of my life! We used to ride around with the Union Jack doubled onto the Natal flag and say it was the "last British outpost" ha ha but I have heard from friends that it is now so different and has gone back to its African roots big time and not worth going to and tbh I do not want to go there. I am going back to CT with OH in Dec for 3 months and we hope to do this regularly to get away from weather here and see family. He loves it there too so I am lucky. Speaking to an old school pal yesterday she hit the nail on the head when she said that old friends share your "history"! I cannot expect people here or even in Britain to understand my history so I think my expectations may be a bit too high! I am starting to realise that just having someone with a common interest I can then have "friends" but they will always mostly be acquaintances.

feelbritish

I have known people here for 12 years and still cannot have a controversial conversation with them, everything must be politically correct and we get told that what we say is "not appropriate" especially my OH with his real British humour! I took all my "Canadian" friends off my Facebook so that I could be myself and say what I wanted to on my own page. I am not a controversial person and quite mild but I have lived in interesting times and experienced stuff that no Canadian will ever understand. Perhaps now with terrorism becoming a reality they may start to understand. As for social life, it is zero here! I have never watched so much tv (albeit mostly crap until I got full package and a pvr) and when really down spent my time in a fog of alcoholic pleasure! Wine helped a lot! Now I am watching it for health reasons and as we are retiring cannot afford these ridiculous prices for their wine! With the Canadian dollar now so low we cannot even think of moving back to UK anymore. Good for bringing in our income from UK though! I have a good library in town, am renovating our house and the garden will be next in the spring so that keeps me busy together with my art! Lonely life but I look forward to my 3 months in CT to socialise and have fun! Then I need to give my liver a rest when I get back here

powdaking

HI

Our 6 year anniversary arrives tomorrow.

I too came with a job, and like you it was to Alberta (High River). We jumped through hoops to get our PR and eventually we got it, I will apply for Citizenship even though I have no intention of remaining in Canada. I find the only friends I have here are work mates (English), of which FRIENDS I would class 2 of them. Its hard to make friends with people that just dont get you, we have tried. We live in a great small community, however it took Canada's worst natural disaster for our town (which was devastated) to come together. And the togetherness was really brought to our attention with the thousands of volunteers from around the country that came to help those in need, I cant thank them enough. For those of you that live here, could you honestly say that people would help like that in the UK? So yes the Canadians are the nicest people you could meet, and our neighbors are great, but if they just don't get you its hard to make friends.
It is becoming very stagnant for us, go to work, go to bed, go to work. Not sure if any of you would agree, but i found the first 2 years were great (apart from the job), everything is new so you explore as much as you can, see what you can and do what you can... We have the Rockies on our doorstep, so some great adventures there.
Would be a lot better if we had some friends to enjoy it with. OMG this is depressing... Like others have said, a great place to live raise a family but do your research first.
If I could rewind the clock and do it all again, i would do exactly the same, believe it or not, i have no regrets. Although it is time for a change.
A great pub and a chip shop that doesn't open a box would make life better.

Almost Canadian

Get yourself over to The George in Okotoks (a short distance off Southridge Drive behind the CO-OP gas bar). It's fish and chips are not "chip shop" style, but they are the best I have tasted this side of the Atlantic.

stuabroad

Well said!

Shard

Well happy 6th to both BEers!

Could it be that you're trying to fit in somewhere too rural? What is it that they don't "get" about you? Humour or something more?

powdaking

They sure dont understand humor,, especially Sarcasm..lol

I am a very outgoing person, when i have a beer inside; i can be one of the funniest and nicest guys you could meet....my head is full of one liners that can be thrown out at the blink of an eye. Just about any conversation, death of a family member, suicide bomber, natural disater; i can throw out a few one liners and turn the conversation from doom and gloom to pratically ROFL. Unfortunately the Canadians I know just dont get me, Ithink they are too serious. Dont get me wrong, i know when to switch it off too.

ANyway, here we are 6 years later, we have a beautiful house in the wonderful community of High River, Alberta (where basball caps are replaced with cowboy hats), and we have our first child (a little Canuck)... So in amongst the crap is something wonderful.

Shard

Nope sarcasm and irony aren't big in rural parts. It's probably not so much seriousness as generally not being tuned to that kind of humour. With your little Canuck you'll have lots more opportunities to participate in your community and relate to people in different ways. And of course your one-liners and wit are more than welcome on BE!

Jericho79

Same here. Dont regret the move, although, with hindsight, not sure if I would do it again.

jossie

I don't think you have to accept any of these points. We have found the opposite?
No problems having deep conversations with our Canadian friends.
Lots of close friends that we can rely on, only 2 of which are expats.
The Canadians we hang out with have a great sense of humor, get the British humor, sarcasm etc.
Lots of great and varied food (wine & craft beer also!)
Everything must be big...if you are talking trucks, RVs, houses etc then I don't see anything wrong with this, in fact I love that there is lots of space to have "big" stuff.

I think when expats only have expats as friends that can be a problem as conversations can revolve around putting Canada and Canadians down which can feed into a negative perspective on life and people here.

Piff Poff