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Un-happy in Canada!

Un-happy in Canada!

Old Jan 24th 2015, 11:23 pm
  #106  
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Default Re: Un-happy in Canada!

Originally Posted by Jsmth321
I am not sure. I am not too familiar with No. California. It may very well be more there since its the state capital and that creates demand.

Ive only been to No. California 3 or 4 times over 35 years.
Same Although if I had an American green card I would likely rectify that.
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Old Jan 25th 2015, 12:26 am
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Default Re: Un-happy in Canada!

Originally Posted by Shard
Same Although if I had an American green card I would likely rectify that.
If we had the earning capacity to pay for medical insurance and the costs associated with it and assuming the US would let my GF live in the US, we would move to San Diego. Mostly so we were closer to my family.

My GF only has 1 family member close by, her mom. Her brother lives on Vancouver Island but they never see one another, she is estranged from her dad, so no family here except her mom.

The rest of her family are in various places around Europe, he mom and her mom's brother are the only 2 who came to Canada.

Honestly if I had not met my GF when I did, I'd have likely ended up back in SD. I find as I get older, it's been harder to be away from family. I think mostly due to the fact my parents are nearing 60 now, and I basically missed seeing my nieces and nephews grow up.
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Old Jan 25th 2015, 12:55 am
  #108  
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Default Re: Un-happy in Canada!

Originally Posted by ann m
It's been said time and time again, but I definitely think that having satisfactory employment is the crux of settling somewhere new.

It doesn't have to be the best job in the land, and it doesn't have to be the maximum you could earn but it does have be personally fulfilling and allow you to feel reasonably fairly compensated for your efforts.
Yes i think this is definitely a key factor. We got lucky as we managed to buy a business and work together as husband and wife even though we hadn't planned on doing that. I truly believe that if i had gone out to work 5 days a week leaving my wife at home she would have quickly hated Kelowna and wanted to go home to her family.
We chose Kelowna without knowing what we would do but on the basis that we spent huge sums of money and years planning this immigration thing so the last thing we wanted was to move somewhere that we didn't like the look of or didn't have that "wow' factor so to speak.
I hear people complain they miss the ocean. We have huge lakes that are ideal for swimming, sunbathing and any kind of watersport you desire and in the busy summer they even have waves. I also hear people complaining that Kelowna is a bit remote but i guess if busy City life is their thing then Calgary or Vancouver can offer that but personally i wouldn't want to live in either place but enjoy visiting them, so for me its a question of living and working in "paradise" and spending short breaks in the big Cities rather than the other way around.
Like i say we got lucky with work and enjoy spending winters skiing and skating and summers on the lake. We have made great Canadian friends with a good sense of humour who we see regularly and some other ex pat friends we hang out with and camp with whenever we can.
I feel for the OP as it is not easy when you are in a new life that doesn't seem to be going where you hoped
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Old Jan 25th 2015, 5:49 am
  #109  
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Default Re: Un-happy in Canada!

Originally Posted by Alan2005
Yes I agree. I'm definitely not average. My special snowflake status is confirmed as I've lived in three countries now. Can you imagine the guts that took? No, well, it was a lot.
Canada is my 3rd country to live in. I do have to say it's harder meeting people here then the UK or New Zealand. People are nice, but they seem false. But this is my opinion of vancouver which is a very clicky City. Even my gf whom is canadian says the same thing about people here, which she came to realise after a 2 year stint in the UK and coming back here.
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Old Jan 25th 2015, 8:44 am
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Default Re: Un-happy in Canada!

Originally Posted by MrHyperPants
Canada is my 3rd country to live in. I do have to say it's harder meeting people here then the UK or New Zealand. People are nice, but they seem false. But this is my opinion of vancouver which is a very clicky City. Even my gf whom is canadian says the same thing about people here, which she came to realise after a 2 year stint in the UK and coming back here.
That's a good point. Yes I've found that too. I spent time in Vancouver and Victoria, there's a veneer of friendliness but seems difficult to make real friends. I often chatted to people you see each week in the running club etc. Nice people for sure but they always declined meeting up for an eve. drink, dinner, or pop round to the house of a Weekend for a natter.
Though I still enjoy many aspects of Canada. Really like the lifestyle.
But again as you and your girlfriend mentioned, in the UK once you get to know people, there's more ease with making friends, getting together.
It's a bit of a generalisation I guess, but those have been my experiences in Vancouver & Victoria.
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Old Jan 25th 2015, 5:45 pm
  #111  
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Default Re: Un-happy in Canada!

Originally Posted by MrHyperPants
Canada is my 3rd country to live in. I do have to say it's harder meeting people here then the UK or New Zealand. People are nice, but they seem false. But this is my opinion of vancouver which is a very clicky City. Even my gf whom is canadian says the same thing about people here, which she came to realise after a 2 year stint in the UK and coming back here.
Vancouver is well known for the difficulty in meeting people, it's a bit better elsewhere but then you also have to watch out as sometimes they will have a motive to being nice to you, such as in Abbotsford some will be friendly at first in a attempt to convert you to their church, once they find out you have no interest they are done with you.

The US and Canada people tend to keep to themselves once they get out of the party stage of life.. In my experience. You can live for several years in the same place and not know who your neighbors are.
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Old Jan 29th 2015, 3:44 am
  #112  
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Default Re: Un-happy in Canada!

Originally Posted by MrHyperPants
Canada is my 3rd country to live in. I do have to say it's harder meeting people here then the UK or New Zealand. People are nice, but they seem false. But this is my opinion of vancouver which is a very clicky City. Even my gf whom is canadian says the same thing about people here, which she came to realise after a 2 year stint in the UK and coming back here.
I have both good things and bad things to say about Canadians but I don't think they are false. I think they substitute self preservation for politeness and political correctness for empathy. Truth is most of them don't really give a shit about anyone else and have a hard time placing themselves in other people's shoes. But you can make friends here. Just don't expect them to have a deep connection or a feeling of shared understanding. I find them to be really immature almost to the point of having a well behaved but spoilt five year old's sense of ethics and morals.
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Old Jan 29th 2015, 4:00 am
  #113  
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Default Re: Un-happy in Canada!

Originally Posted by Delboy07
Hi folks, I am a newby to the Expat Forum, I hope I am posting in the right place.

Any how I am in need of a shoulder rub or a kick up the arse!

Not sure where to begin here, but here is the jist of things.

I have been in Canada actually Vernon BC for 12 years, absolutely beautiful and I have had 4 kids since being here technically all is good, I have PR and qualify for Citizenship but I have got to the point where I have decided I hate it here and want to go back home but my wife is Canadian and of course does not want to live in the UK.

I miss everything and have got to the point where everything Canadian is sickening me! I am so claustrophobic; I look out my window on an evening down the Valley and over the town and literally feel dizzy when I think there is nothing past it other than miles and miles of trees!

I miss everything from home and am having nightmares/dreams of staying in Canada

Logistically I cannot go home and realistically know it is not really the right answer, I guess I am writing in a hope some people may set me straight, might cheer me up a bit, may be there are others feel the same way and found a way to deal with it.

If I could ping pong I would but after keeping the bread and butter on the table the cost of travel is just a long dream

I guess there are other factors involved

  • I have attention deficit disorder or as I call it grass is greener syndrome
  • Father in UK passed away last year
  • My kids have never seen there English family (except nan)
  • I have found it very difficult to make friends in the Okanagan, real friends that is, not really yet found a Canadian who gets our humour or camaraderie
  • The labour market in the Okanagan is tough and work has been very hard to keep


So that is it in a nutshell

Thanks guys
i echo your sentiments, will expand later
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Old Feb 11th 2015, 4:47 pm
  #114  
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Default Re: Un-happy in Canada!

Originally Posted by Lychee
A lot of Albertans holiday in the Okanagan and only know it from that context: lakeside resorts, wineries, boating, ski trips, etc. It's no doubt a lovely place for a quick holiday, but I can only imagine that living there is a different experience entirely. Those who think you are crazy are romanticizing about the Okanagan with rose coloured specs based on their holidays spent there, no doubt. I work with a woman, early 30s, who grew up in Vernon. She told me she moved as quickly as she could to Vancouver as soon as she graduated high school, and would never move back again, mainly for the reasons stated by you and delboy.
Yeah, living here is awful. The beaches, boating, camping, hiking, golfing, wineries, hunting, fishing, snowmobiling, snow shoeing, cross country skiing, ice fishing, climbing etc. it's such a drag. Might have to suffer again this weekend and drag my ass up to another amazing ski resort.
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Old Feb 11th 2015, 6:19 pm
  #115  
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Default Re: Un-happy in Canada!

Sounds dreadful!

My point is that you have to want to pursue an outdoor lifestyle to get the most out of living in the Okanagan. Others, who crave a cosmopolitan urban lifestyle, often find the Okanagan lacking. Personally, I am a fan of visiting the Okanagan. I have never lived there.
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Old Feb 11th 2015, 7:07 pm
  #116  
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Default Re: Un-happy in Canada!

How would this be different from the UK.. If you crave an urban cosmopolitan lifestyle you would head to London. If you want an outdoor lifestyle the Brecon Beacons, Lake District, Scottish Highlands tick the boxes.

Few places serve both niches.

Originally Posted by Lychee

My point is that you have to want to pursue an outdoor lifestyle to get the most out of living in the Okanagan. Others, who crave a cosmopolitan urban lifestyle, often find the Okanagan lacking.
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Old Feb 11th 2015, 7:13 pm
  #117  
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Default Re: Un-happy in Canada!

Originally Posted by Lychee
Sounds dreadful!

My point is that you have to want to pursue an outdoor lifestyle to get the most out of living in the Okanagan. Others, who crave a cosmopolitan urban lifestyle, often find the Okanagan lacking. Personally, I am a fan of visiting the Okanagan. I have never lived there.
To be honest we have found that living here in the Okanagan is much the same as being on vacation here. For example this weekend gone we snow shoed on Saturday, cross country skied on Sunday and downhill skied on Monday. Each time we saw tourists that were here on vacation and we are always mindful that we are lucky as this is just a normal weekend for us. Same as in the summer months when we are on the lake or beach or doing a wine tour. We bump into tourists but these are things we do all the time. I agree with you that people who love the outdoors love it here. People who are after the city life tend not to fare too well. The only British couple I know that left the Okanagan were into the UK pub culture and they liked their designer labels and shopping. As far as I am concerned those type of people are best off back in the UK.
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Old Feb 11th 2015, 7:44 pm
  #118  
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Default Re: Un-happy in Canada!

Originally Posted by jossie
To be honest we have found that living here in the Okanagan is much the same as being on vacation here. For example this weekend gone we snow shoed on Saturday, cross country skied on Sunday and downhill skied on Monday. Each time we saw tourists that were here on vacation and we are always mindful that we are lucky as this is just a normal weekend for us. Same as in the summer months when we are on the lake or beach or doing a wine tour. We bump into tourists but these are things we do all the time. I agree with you that people who love the outdoors love it here. People who are after the city life tend not to fare too well. The only British couple I know that left the Okanagan were into the UK pub culture and they liked their designer labels and shopping. As far as I am concerned those type of people are best off back in the UK.

Seems they agreed with you by leaving. I'm not sure it would suit us either. We love the outdoors, sure, but we also like going into Victoria to "do" stuff. I think a lot would still depend on the availability of suitable work and remuneration. As has already been commented, without sufficient money to enjoy all these activities, they become rather a moot point - even taunting perhaps.
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Old Feb 11th 2015, 10:14 pm
  #119  
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Default Re: Un-happy in Canada!

Originally Posted by Lychee
Sounds dreadful!

My point is that you have to want to pursue an outdoor lifestyle to get the most out of living in the Okanagan. Others, who crave a cosmopolitan urban lifestyle, often find the Okanagan lacking. Personally, I am a fan of visiting the Okanagan. I have never lived there.
That is the problem with Squamish, it's a great place to live if your really into outdoor life and activities, but its a boring, boring, boring place to live if your not into the outdoor life with literally nothing to do. Not even a movie is an option since we have no cinema.
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Old Feb 12th 2015, 12:18 am
  #120  
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Default Re: Un-happy in Canada!

Originally Posted by Jsmth321
That is the problem with Squamish, it's a great place to live if your really into outdoor life and activities, but its a boring, boring, boring place to live if your not into the outdoor life with literally nothing to do. Not even a movie is an option since we have no cinema.
The Okanagan doesn't have this issue. We have a brand new cinemas, brand new event centers (hockey arena) so good hockey and concerts in town, good restaurants, lots of great wineries which also many have great lake view restaurants, great micro breweries so good local craft beer. We are also currently having a new theatre built. There are bars and night clubs - not a lot of them but they are here. Great beaches, great lakes, great golf courses etc. Shops are pretty good too.
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