CalgaryPete

We have been back in the UK for six weeks.

The first month in Devon was fine. We were staying in a friends house. So we weren't really starting our new life. (We being me and my dog Nyla.)

We are now renting an old house in a village in Lancashire. We have been here 2 weeks. We have a good hill for our daily dog walks. We have a car. Our furniture arrived today. I will start looking for work after Easter.

But since moving north, I have started wondering how long it might be before moving back to the UK feels worth the stress and worries?

Is it typically some weeks or months? Or is it some specific circumstances such as going to work, or getting your own place? I know there won't be a single 'right' answer, but it would help to know whether other people found it took some time before the upheaval and uncertainty of moving back to the UK felt worth it.

ElizabethK

I know exactly the feeling, Pete.

I'm not sure what I was expecting upon moving back home, but if I'm honest about it all, as much as I enjoy living here it sort of feels hollow. I can't put my finger on anything specific or maybe I just can't put it into words properly, but it's not given me the euphoria and buzz that I had imagined it would for the 17 years of living in USA. I arrived back in July 2013.

I've realised that location does not change me, I was me whilst in USA the same as I am me in UK. I'm still the same, nothing's changed. (incidentally, I am settled in my own house and have a job)

So, in answer to your question, I have no idea when it will feel worth it.

( just re-read what I've written and I sound terribly negative, I am happy to be back, honest! )

iaink

I expect its different for everyone. How long did it take before moving the North America felt worth the stress and worry?

CalgaryPete

We were very settled in Calgary, with a familiar routine. We are not yet settled into our new life in The UK. I wanted a couple of specific things from the move: familiar British hills and visits to see friends and family. I have those now, but along with them come many other changes, some better, some worse, many just different and unfamiliar at the moment. I was prepared for many of them, but not for the cumulative impact of so much change at once.

Physically, we are back in the UK, but emotionally I still feel like a visitor.

CalgaryPete

Just a few days. I was addicted to skiing back then so that was all I needed.

TheEmperorIsNaked

..........................because you've been back a metaphorical 10 minutes kiddo!
Take more note of this feeling if you still have it in one/two years! Then perhaps consider whether the UK is for you. But now? Way too early I reckon.

I knew-knew that 'home' was for me. Despite the severe problems I have/ am experiencing, that doesn't change. Settling (I wish!) back has been seamless.

The UK has NOT changed. Systems within the UK have changed (and not for the better),-as they have changed everywhere.

Politicians though have not changed at all, they are the same todious wats that they always have been.
And that is international too.

ncoomber

Here, here !!

Englishmaple

Just wondered how you're finding things these days Pete?

I can relate to what you posted ... since I got back (mid-April) I feel like I've had a ton of new and unfamiliar things to deal with ... it's been quite exhausting. I'm really looking forward to things settling down in a few months (I hope).

windsong

When I go back in three weeks, I expect to feel like a visitor for a few years. Hopefully, it won't be anything near that long but that's what I expect. I don't think it will be easy to shake off the effects of living in the USA.

I have to learn how to get things done over there. Thankfully, I have a friend who will help me at every step of the way there. Even so, I want to know how to do this on my own.

I want a place of my own and that won't be for at least three months.

I want to know I can survive over there independently. That won't be until I feel settled in a nice job.

Any time I have moved within the USA, it has taken me a full year to feel as if "I belong". I have to experience every holiday, every season once. Then the next year, I remember those experiences in the first year and somehow it then feels like "old hat". And that's moving within the same country. This is an international move which I think will take longer.

I was in the USA five years before I could even begin to resign myself to living here. I don't think it will take as long in the UK but it will certainly take a year or two, I am sure.

Then on top of all that, we have to get used to a new society, a government that operates completely differently, the weather, etc.

I am not even counting on enjoying the first two or three months because there will be so much to do and everything will be new.

I have wanted to return for years and years and years but I am not blind to the process of readjustment.

Be patient with yourself and give it lots of time.

morayeel

Well Said Windsong. Seems like you are prepared for all the emotions you are bound to feel in the weeks and months ahead of you. I wish you and your doggies all the luck and happiness.

windsong

Thank you, Morayeel!

It will be nice to finally touch down on British soil.

rebeccajo

windsong, who is the friend who is helping you over there?

deepcpearl

I'm not convinced this is the best attitude... "I'm not going to enjoy it because it's different." Aren't the differences exactly why you're moving in the first place?

Surely the first two or three months are when it's all exciting and new and fun?

moggi1964

I think "..not counting on..." is okay. Had she said "..not planning on..." then I think she would be missing out.

I read it as 'I'm prepared to not have that initial high of being back or at least ready for it to last only a short time' I think it is a good approach if there is a lot of anticipated uncertainty in the aftermath of the move.

lgabriel73

I have to agree the first few months are probably going to the the ones you should enjoy the most before the day to day reality of having to work etc kicks in. I don't think that you can plan your emotions and reactions either. You won't know until you get there. And if you've been away along time like Windsong then I think you are going to be in "vacation" frame of mind when you first get there. For me I expected to have a lot if ups and downs in the first months and a lot of doubt kicking in but that hasn't happened. When is it worth it? For me it was the minute I landed!!