CalgaryPete

But I use Asda home delivery! I sit on the sofa with Nyla and we choose all our food, with no rain at all. I have completely missed the point haven't I?

Leaving Canada did feel slightly like breaking up. Sometimes I still look at pictures of Canada. Am I being unfaithful to Britain? I don't like letting go of things so even after ten months back in the UK I feel reluctant to say Canada is in the past.

I will book an appointment with Relate, and see if they can help me and Britain figure things out.

CalgaryPete

I chose the north west because it's close enough to the lake district for day walks and to Scotland for weekends. We could also afford to buy a place in the north west whereas that might not be possible in the south west. So we could be stuck renting if we move south.

I think I might settle more quickly if I was closer to family and friends in the south west. But I might miss having the lake district hills nearby. So I wonder if I just need to give the north west more time.

sallysimmons

between two worlds

Hm I see, yes this is a dilemma.

Of course in the s-w you have the Mendips, Quantocks, Dartmoor, Exmoor, etc.

BUT I know very well that one's love for a particular place, a particular landscape, can run very deep…if it is the Lake District, which is certainly unique, that you need to be near, then I can see how that competes with the pull of friends and family in the s-w. Then the lower house prices in north tipped the balance for your decision.

here's a mental exercise to try (I hope this doesn't sound patronising--this kind of thing helps me work out what I really want, sometimes):-

Imagine money isn't an issue--imagine you can buy a place in the s-w just as easily as you could in the north.
Now is the decision clearer?

vikingsail

Well said, I try and use the same method and it is always good to be reminded of it. JK Rowling springs to mind as someone who likely can live anywhere in the world but chooses Scotland.

not2old

when one has lived in Canada for a few years you sort of get used to traveling 5KM for one or two grocery items, even the movies, Doctors or a Hockey game..

unless its positioning, work or financial....

If the NW is where you'd like to be, then surely the travel to relatives further down the country is only 3-4 hours away?

Relative...

Calgary to Edmonton ~300KM

Manchester to Mendip ~ 300KM

Good luck with your decision Pete

CalgaryPete

No. Sorry! I'm just dithering because I want 3 different places. (The Lake District, the south west and Calgary. And possibly Portugal too, as I have been missing sunshine). As long as I put off making a decision, I don't have to let go of any of them.

not2old

forget that lot, move to Malta

CalgaryPete

My family and friends are at least 6 hours drive away, sometimes more with traffic. I think that being able to visit people and return home the same day might make me feel more connected. But you are right, I can now visit within for a long weekend, so I see them far more often than I did when I was in Canada.

CalgaryPete

Do they have decent cheese?

fuchs01

You have often used the ' I ' and on some occasions the 'we'.
Do you have a partner who shared your experiences, do you confide in them, and listen
to those concerns he/she may have, or what their opinions might be.
Some of your posts seem very singular.I dont know your situation, but your worries
will only be compounded, if you are only bouncing off this site, and keeping these
thoughts to yourself, opening up all to your closest around you, will give you a totally
different perspective, because its only those who can help to balance these 'to n fro'
pulling thoughts and confusions.
If I am on the wrong track, then I do apologise...

CalgaryPete

I do have a companion that I confide in but it is difficult to get her opinion because her English is extremely limited: mostly 'sit', 'stay', heel' and 'dinner time'.

I share some thoughts with family and friends but I think it's difficult for people that have not lived abroad to understand our perspective, as expats or returnees.

not2old

You betcha & everything more that you'd get in Calgary, other than snow of course

Make a recce. After being an immigrant & returning back to blighty, Malta may be just the fix you need to settle down at.

Your companion will fit in well there

dunroving

+1 The advantage of being the only decision-maker is you get no arguments, and you get to make all the decisions.

The flip side is it would be nice to get a second or third opinion. I find friends and colleagues unable to get their heads around the perspective of an expat (except one colleague and his wife who moved to the same US institution as me at the same time). And after you come back its a similar thing. Most of the people I know and work with here have hardly moved more than 30 miles their whole lives..

Wombat7

Won't take long to do a recce, the place is tiny. Lovely place to visit but it would take quite an adjustment for me to live there