Women over 40?
Jul 23rd 2005, 10:22 am
#16
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Re: Women over 40?
Thanks for the Karma ladies. Let me know when you arrive in Aus & I'll send you a reminder to live your dream!
Jul 23rd 2005, 10:28 am
#17
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 2,873
Re: Women over 40?
Originally Posted by G'Day
I have also found that the distance has been a fabulous thing for our familial relationships. Suddenly my father, who was always sooo disappointed in me for not wanting to follow in his footsteps that he could barely be civil to me, let alone recognise my successes, is celebrating my successes in life and telling his friends how proud he is of me! My mother, who always treated me like a child, has suddenly realised that I am an adult and we are each other's best friends. My mother-in-law is telling everyone how wonderful we've raised our children :scared: - when we were there all she could do was criticise every decision we made because it wasn't the way she did things. I think distance can be a wonderful thing for families, especially if you are an independent spirit with ideas of your own.
* apologies in advance, I can feel a major whinge coming on*
Both my brother and sister went off to university and got good jobs but I was just a waste of space. She never talked about me to people she knows until many years later after I had retrained and am now teaching. She would merrily tell everyone about my brother and his wife, Mr & Mrs important consultants. No I don't have a problem with my brother we get on very well. But once my sister emigrated to Australia having married an electrician (urgh tut) she was relegated to the lower ranks as well. My mum found my old school reports a couple of years ago and when she gave them to me she told me off for them all over again!!!
How does she manage to still make me feel like an inadequate child? She complains that I am too fat (ok I am), yet when I have lost weight before she told me I was too thin. She moans because we are too busy to go and see her yet if I wasn't working she would accuse me of being lazy.
Look guys I am really really sorry about all this. I am feeling very very low at the moment for several reasons (crying). Just ignore me, enjoy this wonderful thread and I shall try not to interfere.
Jul 23rd 2005, 10:35 am
#18
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Re: Women over 40?
Originally Posted by Anne4Terry
I'm pleased to see that you are getting on better with your family. I can't see that ever happening with me. I am 43 and my mother still talks to me like I am such a disappointment to her. She has never forgiven me for getting married and having children at such a young age. "What a waste of money that was on your private education!" is what I get thrown at me.
* apologies in advance, I can feel a major whinge coming on*
Both my brother and sister went off to university and got good jobs but I was just a waste of space. She never talked about me to people she knows until many years later after I had retrained and am now teaching. She would merrily tell everyone about my brother and his wife, Mr & Mrs important consultants. No I don't have a problem with my brother we get on very well. But once my sister emigrated to Australia having married an electrician (urgh tut) she was relegated to the lower ranks as well. My mum found my old school reports a couple of years ago and when she gave them to me she told me off for them all over again!!!
How does she manage to still make me feel like an inadequate child? She complains that I am too fat (ok I am), yet when I have lost weight before she told me I was too thin. She moans because we are too busy to go and see her yet if I wasn't working she would accuse me of being lazy.
Look guys I am really really sorry about all this. I am feeling very very low at the moment for several reasons (crying). Just ignore me, enjoy this wonderful thread and I shall try not to interfere.
* apologies in advance, I can feel a major whinge coming on*
Both my brother and sister went off to university and got good jobs but I was just a waste of space. She never talked about me to people she knows until many years later after I had retrained and am now teaching. She would merrily tell everyone about my brother and his wife, Mr & Mrs important consultants. No I don't have a problem with my brother we get on very well. But once my sister emigrated to Australia having married an electrician (urgh tut) she was relegated to the lower ranks as well. My mum found my old school reports a couple of years ago and when she gave them to me she told me off for them all over again!!!
How does she manage to still make me feel like an inadequate child? She complains that I am too fat (ok I am), yet when I have lost weight before she told me I was too thin. She moans because we are too busy to go and see her yet if I wasn't working she would accuse me of being lazy.
Look guys I am really really sorry about all this. I am feeling very very low at the moment for several reasons (crying). Just ignore me, enjoy this wonderful thread and I shall try not to interfere.
Anne. I can relate to how you feel and empathise, but guess what? You dont HAVE to live your life to please your mother (or anyone else for that matter)
I had an overbaring mother and father and lived under a cloud of inadequacy for years and years. It wasn't until my husband sat me down one day and asked my why i am living my life for my parents instead of myself? (considering i am far more likely to be around longer than they are) I then realised how ridiculous i was being. I had wasted many years trying to please people who would never be pleased regardless unless i followed orders! It was only then that i started to rebuild my own self esteem and confidence.
Wish i could give you a hug. I know you need one.
Jul 23rd 2005, 10:47 am
#19
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Joined: Aug 2003
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 2,389
Re: Women over 40?
Great thread.
I have enjoyed reading the replies and would say that as an "over 45" I can relate to wanting a new life , a new start and new opportunities. But I'm still at the stage of working out how to get the visa to OZ
.
My school friend who married an Aussie and lives in Sydney has been staying here with me this week. Both she and my other school friend who lives in Melbourne, talk of "the good lifestyle" they have in oz. They are not materialistic or own huge houses but are happy with what they have and enjoy the fresh air and living by the sea.
I agree with the post about materialism in UK. my hubby is attracted by the idea of more time to play golf and tennis less time at work. I would like a new career(- as Victoria doesn't recognise my NNEB
)I want to be with like minded people, other people who enjoy travelling the world, and others who have struggled to get their new life.
The two recces I've done to OZ alone have given me the self confidence that I can travel alone and drive thousands of kms without hubby and have the motivation to do it. I've realised that the struggle to get to oz is all part of the life change, its making me a stronger more determined person. Hopefully I've grown wiser and become a better listener I'm more sympathetic and empathetic to the other expats struggling to get to OZ. I found these words helpful:
" From the moment you set your sights on a goal and start to take action, you begin to reap its rewards. The actual attainment is only the final reward- there a many more along the way"
Good luck to all the under 40s and over 40s ready for a knew challenge
I have enjoyed reading the replies and would say that as an "over 45" I can relate to wanting a new life , a new start and new opportunities. But I'm still at the stage of working out how to get the visa to OZ
. My school friend who married an Aussie and lives in Sydney has been staying here with me this week. Both she and my other school friend who lives in Melbourne, talk of "the good lifestyle" they have in oz. They are not materialistic or own huge houses but are happy with what they have and enjoy the fresh air and living by the sea.
I agree with the post about materialism in UK. my hubby is attracted by the idea of more time to play golf and tennis less time at work. I would like a new career(- as Victoria doesn't recognise my NNEB
)I want to be with like minded people, other people who enjoy travelling the world, and others who have struggled to get their new life. The two recces I've done to OZ alone have given me the self confidence that I can travel alone and drive thousands of kms without hubby and have the motivation to do it. I've realised that the struggle to get to oz is all part of the life change, its making me a stronger more determined person. Hopefully I've grown wiser and become a better listener I'm more sympathetic and empathetic to the other expats struggling to get to OZ. I found these words helpful:
" From the moment you set your sights on a goal and start to take action, you begin to reap its rewards. The actual attainment is only the final reward- there a many more along the way"
Good luck to all the under 40s and over 40s ready for a knew challenge
Jul 23rd 2005, 10:55 am
#20
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Thread Starter
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Posts: 622
Re: Women over 40?
And good luck to you too Helinuk.
We all deserve this new life and new beginning
We all deserve this new life and new beginning
Jul 23rd 2005, 10:58 am
#21
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Joined: Oct 2004
Location: 4 monkeys back in Jersey (what is going on?)
Posts: 79
Re: Women over 40?
Great thread.
If one has the ability and the time, how does one say "No-thank-you" when asked for a favour?
I sure wish I could.
Any pointers?
Justin (a bloke hurtling towards 40)
If one has the ability and the time, how does one say "No-thank-you" when asked for a favour?
I sure wish I could.
Any pointers?
Justin (a bloke hurtling towards 40)
Jul 23rd 2005, 11:07 am
#22
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Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 65,493
Re: Women over 40?
Originally Posted by Monkeyrillas
Great thread.
If one has the ability and the time, how does one say "No-thank-you" when asked for a favour?
I sure wish I could.
Any pointers?
Justin (a bloke hurtling towards 40)
If one has the ability and the time, how does one say "No-thank-you" when asked for a favour?
I sure wish I could.
Any pointers?
Justin (a bloke hurtling towards 40)
Jul 23rd 2005, 11:12 am
#23
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Posts: n/a
Re: Women over 40?
Originally Posted by Monkeyrillas
Great thread. If one has the ability and the time, how does one say "No-thank-you" when asked for a favour?
I sure wish I could.
Any pointers?
Justin (a bloke hurtling towards 40)
I sure wish I could.
Any pointers?
Justin (a bloke hurtling towards 40)
Originally Posted by moneypen20
Take a deep breath, smile and just say it. First time is hard, second easier, third piece of cake. Don't worry about explanations. Your decision, doesn't need enlarging upon
Someone once gave me some great advice.
Those that matter don't mind.
Those that mind don't matter.
Jul 23rd 2005, 11:15 am
#24
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Joined: Aug 2003
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 2,389
Re: Women over 40?
Originally Posted by Monkeyrillas
Great thread.
If one has the ability and the time, how does one say "No-thank-you" when asked for a favour?
I sure wish I could.
Any pointers?
Justin (a bloke hurtling towards 40)
If one has the ability and the time, how does one say "No-thank-you" when asked for a favour?
I sure wish I could.
Any pointers?
Justin (a bloke hurtling towards 40)
easier typed than said!
Jul 23rd 2005, 11:48 am
#25
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Posts: 2,630
Re: Women over 40?
Merlot
Funny you should mention the Next sale. On Thursday last day of school 6 women had arranged to go to Next TOGETHER to be there for 6am opening. they do this every year. They all buy the same thing and turn up in September at school gates looking like Stepford Wives!!! Don't get me wrong -I love Next but 'get a life'. springs to mind.
I have to admire you for changing your life - if you don't like something GET OUT. When I lived in another village a few years ago the women in my road had a rota for coffee mornings. A was Monday B was Tuesday etc. what do you talk about seeing the same people every day? 3 of them came round one day with a clipboard and actually TOLD me (not ASK) that I had been 'allocated Wednesday to host coffee' - I am not joking. Needless to say I told them to go forth and multiply nicely and I wasn't interested in the Xmas day walk to the post box and back with 10 other couples either. I am not joking again!! We only lasted 7 months in that village.
Am enjoying this great thread. I am a 43 year old going on 21 but had my daughter late as she is only 7. We cannot wait to get to Oz to get away from all this nonsense and start again. Sounds like most people feel the same.
BTW how many of you 30/40 yr olds still feel 18.
Funny you should mention the Next sale. On Thursday last day of school 6 women had arranged to go to Next TOGETHER to be there for 6am opening. they do this every year. They all buy the same thing and turn up in September at school gates looking like Stepford Wives!!! Don't get me wrong -I love Next but 'get a life'. springs to mind.
I have to admire you for changing your life - if you don't like something GET OUT. When I lived in another village a few years ago the women in my road had a rota for coffee mornings. A was Monday B was Tuesday etc. what do you talk about seeing the same people every day? 3 of them came round one day with a clipboard and actually TOLD me (not ASK) that I had been 'allocated Wednesday to host coffee' - I am not joking. Needless to say I told them to go forth and multiply nicely and I wasn't interested in the Xmas day walk to the post box and back with 10 other couples either. I am not joking again!! We only lasted 7 months in that village.
Am enjoying this great thread. I am a 43 year old going on 21 but had my daughter late as she is only 7. We cannot wait to get to Oz to get away from all this nonsense and start again. Sounds like most people feel the same.
BTW how many of you 30/40 yr olds still feel 18.
Jul 23rd 2005, 11:54 am
#26
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Re: Women over 40?
Originally Posted by suzy
Merlot
Funny you should mention the Next sale. On Thursday last day of school 6 women had arranged to go to Next TOGETHER to be there for 6am opening. they do this every year. They all buy the same thing and turn up in September at school gates looking like Stepford Wives!!! Don't get me wrong -I love Next but 'get a life'. springs to mind.
I have to admire you for changing your life - if you don't like something GET OUT. When I lived in another village a few years ago the women in my road had a rota for coffee mornings. A was Monday B was Tuesday etc. what do you talk about seeing the same people every day? 3 of them came round one day with a clipboard and actually TOLD me (not ASK) that I had been 'allocated Wednesday to host coffee' - I am not joking. Needless to say I told them to go forth and multiply nicely and I wasn't interested in the Xmas day walk to the post box and back with 10 other couples either. I am not joking again!! We only lasted 7 months in that village.
Am enjoying this great thread. I am a 43 year old going on 21 but had my daughter late as she is only 7. We cannot wait to get to Oz to get away from all this nonsense and start again. Sounds like most people feel the same.
BTW how many of you 30/40 yr olds still feel 18.
Funny you should mention the Next sale. On Thursday last day of school 6 women had arranged to go to Next TOGETHER to be there for 6am opening. they do this every year. They all buy the same thing and turn up in September at school gates looking like Stepford Wives!!! Don't get me wrong -I love Next but 'get a life'. springs to mind.
I have to admire you for changing your life - if you don't like something GET OUT. When I lived in another village a few years ago the women in my road had a rota for coffee mornings. A was Monday B was Tuesday etc. what do you talk about seeing the same people every day? 3 of them came round one day with a clipboard and actually TOLD me (not ASK) that I had been 'allocated Wednesday to host coffee' - I am not joking. Needless to say I told them to go forth and multiply nicely and I wasn't interested in the Xmas day walk to the post box and back with 10 other couples either. I am not joking again!! We only lasted 7 months in that village.
Am enjoying this great thread. I am a 43 year old going on 21 but had my daughter late as she is only 7. We cannot wait to get to Oz to get away from all this nonsense and start again. Sounds like most people feel the same.
BTW how many of you 30/40 yr olds still feel 18.
I hope i NEVER feel like i did when i was 18. I was preggers!! :scared: :scared: LOL
I'm looking for the youth i never had. Got bogged down with the serious things in life far too young. But, as the saying goes
YOU'RE NEVER TOO OLD TO HAVE A HAPPY CHILDHOOD
Jul 23rd 2005, 12:04 pm
#27
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,630
Re: Women over 40?
I agree but can't imagine me being mature enough to have a baby at 18. I was working in Europe at 18 , then London, then went to OZ in a working visa. Didn't really grow up till I got married at nearly 30 and that was to a toyboy!!!
Still trying to grow up now. As they say 'Different Strokes for different folks'
Suzy
Still trying to grow up now. As they say 'Different Strokes for different folks'
Suzy
Jul 23rd 2005, 12:40 pm
#28
Crazy Cat Lady
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 65,493
Re: Women over 40?
Originally Posted by suzy
Merlot
Funny you should mention the Next sale. On Thursday last day of school 6 women had arranged to go to Next TOGETHER to be there for 6am opening. they do this every year. They all buy the same thing and turn up in September at school gates looking like Stepford Wives!!! Don't get me wrong -I love Next but 'get a life'. springs to mind..
Funny you should mention the Next sale. On Thursday last day of school 6 women had arranged to go to Next TOGETHER to be there for 6am opening. they do this every year. They all buy the same thing and turn up in September at school gates looking like Stepford Wives!!! Don't get me wrong -I love Next but 'get a life'. springs to mind..
) I use Next occasionally. Doesn't often fit me, never fits my first born and second born generally in age 8/9 instead of 10/11. It's all very nice and that but you do end up wearing the same thing as her next door and everyone else you meet. But why the hell would you want to get up at 5am to QUEUE to get in a shop that is heaving with hundreds of other women all buying the same top :scared: I hate shopping at the best of times but 5am FFS. Not so much as get a life but time to end it 
Jul 23rd 2005, 12:43 pm
#29
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Posts: 2,630
Re: Women over 40?
Originally Posted by moneypen20
Someon e really needs to explain this "Next" sale business to me (on second thoughts ) I use Next occasionally. Doesn't often fit me, never fits my first born and second born generally in age 8/9 instead of 10/11. It's all very nice and that but you do end up wearing the same thing as her next door and everyone else you meet. But why the hell would you want to get up at 5am to QUEUE to get in a shop that is heaving with hundreds of other women all buying the same top :scared: I hate shopping at the best of times but 5am FFS. Not so much as get a life but time to end it
) I use Next occasionally. Doesn't often fit me, never fits my first born and second born generally in age 8/9 instead of 10/11. It's all very nice and that but you do end up wearing the same thing as her next door and everyone else you meet. But why the hell would you want to get up at 5am to QUEUE to get in a shop that is heaving with hundreds of other women all buying the same top :scared: I hate shopping at the best of times but 5am FFS. Not so much as get a life but time to end it Hear hear
Suzy
Jul 23rd 2005, 12:54 pm
#30
da Bonehead
Joined: Jan 2004
Location: Lion in da jungle
Posts: 22,767
Re: Women over 40?
Originally Posted by Flutterscutter
I sense a girl power revolt regardless of age
When you arrive in Aus would you ladies please pm me for my phone number