juri

Thought some of you might be interested in a recent e-mail I sent-----.

Hello you lot,
The boy has been up since 4am with projectile vomiting (last time we get him fish from a kebab shop), and as a result so have I.
He is now sitting all toasty under the quilt on the couch watching Spy Kids 2 and I am sitting here bored and my feet are freezing, so thought I’d write a wee e-mail to you.
It’s Sunday morning and I’ve just missed the Newcastle v Middlesborough game on telly live, will maybe watch the repeats later. Haven’t had any Scottish games so far but we better get the old firm game or I’m getting it cancelled.
The Foxtel here is very much like Sky and even has the same remote, but there are fewer options and there is many a time when you’re saying ‘The telly is pish tonight’.
(and that’s just the boy saying that).
He has been a nightmare of late and will not give us a moments peace, trying to control every situation and not letting us watch tv, have a conversation, read a paper or go on the computer. Unless he is getting attention it’s not on. It is just one big shouting match from when I come in from work till bed time. Public tantrums are driving Lesley insane ( I need to stop having these). He is very switched on at pulling the right strings to wind us up.
The next bairn is my favourite already. We had a scan a couple of weeks ago and had to wait a few days for results which came back as ‘low risk’, which was a big relief as we have been a bit worried because of Lesley's age.
Seemingly this has been the coldest Winter for some years and it has been uncomfortable in the mornings and at night as we have no central heating. It normally heats up nicely through the day though and it varies from day to day but generally it is bearable and a lot of days are as good as Summer days in the UK.
Did my tax return last week and got a nice surprise as we were expecting about £100 back and got £850, so we went out and bought a bbq, and yesterday took Lesley and Matthew to the Mall for some retail therapy. Lesley got a maternity top, Matthew got a Buzz Lightyear which the girl scanned twice and I never checked till we got home, I only saw the price at the check-out and nearly fainted. So went in the huff for the rest of the shopping trip. The ‘treat’ I got was some foreign sausages from some deli (with leeks). A good day was had by all.
Our house still hasn’t been started but we go to a pre-start meeting next week when they try and sell you upgraded stuff as the house is the basic version, ie better doors driveway borders, better lights, even double electric sockets instead of single ones. You don’t get something for nothing here.
My job is ok and is something that would be ideal back in the UK. It rankles a bit that I can’t seem to see a way of progressing beyond drilling holes as it is very much dead mans shoes and I would say a good few years before even a leading hand vacation came up, of which there are at least 3 people before me in the pecking order. HNC etc don’t seem to have much value either, for any jobs. The wages are also poor and I should get a raise after my probation, but even after another raise for being here a year I will still be under the national average which isn’t ideal.
I was speaking to a toolmaker who said a young girl on work experience at his factory was started on the same hourly rate as him. They seem to be spoiled for tradesmen here and pay them accordingly. A call centre guy told me he is on the average wage ($40000), with no skills at all. I might have to look at another career direction. Imagine me at a call centre- West coast patter - ‘How kin a help yi. Geez a wee minit, awright they’ll bi sumbdy thare it seevin acloak’ Maybe not.
The social life is still a bit of a non starter. The couple we met down in Canning Vale went a bit cold on us after we mentioned we were moving up North and we haven’t heard from them since. Lesley drops Matthew off at nursery (which is handy as it is just a few hundred yards down the road) and because there is no set time for dropping them off she never gets to meet other parents. She took Matthew for swimming lessons, for the first time, on Saturday and had to be helped by someone to dress Matthew, in full tantrum, as he didn’t want to do the swimming, then he did etc.
There is only about six of us in our work area and I haven’t really clicked with anyone I would like to socialise with. Everyone travels a good distance to work there and are all scattered around Perth. We have waved to one of the new neighbours from the car and I’ve spoke to the other neighbour briefly, once in the 4 weeks we’ve been here.
Haven’t done any squash as it is a 20 drive away and they tend to do it for 2 hours Sat or Sun. With Lesley and Matthew couped up all week in the house I can’t be spending half a day playing squash as it’s not really fair on them, plus the fact I have got fat and lazy.
The 6 am starts have taken there toll also cause I am up at 5 and I am trying to put some overtime in to get some days off in lieu when the baby is born and people visit, so there is no time for squash (1/2 hour dinner) or anything else. Welcome to the real world I hear you say.
I know this is all small potatoes compared to your hassles just now, but I’m just trying to paint a picture that shows our quality of life right now is not as good as it was in the UK.
Anyway Spring is round the corner here and the only way is up.
Might try and find some garage sales today. The price of outdoor furniture is criminal here. As you can see, we are getting everything up and running for any GUESTS (hint) who might be coming.
Will be expecting an e-mail of similar length and boring content in return.
Us lot

DebraH

Hi hope yoiu got some sleep!!
How old is Matthew ? We had problems with our eldest when he was alot younger - he is now 9 and a half and I don't think the problem has gone as such, he can still be stubborn and argumentative hopefully he has having his teen stage now!! Our youngest (6) is so much calmer, does as he's told first time (usually) if he gets in a rage he goes up stairs and gets over it, they're all different and maybe we will have problems with him later.
I'm sure things will get better - socially and Matthew.

hevs

Our exact feelings for a good few months. But hang in there, we have been here 10 months now and things are really starting to click. Good luck

JackTheLad

You got the title for thread right anyway. Even though you are a scot (same as me), you are a whinging pom.

HOW can you complain moving half way round the world and then say you don't get to see Killie playing Hibs. Get a grip! Theres a live premiership match on terrestrial tv in 5 minutes that even the UK don't get to see.

Do aussies expect to see Brisbane Lions against St Kilda when they go to UK?

Sorry to hear about your boy and your trouble finding a well paying job. But, maybe its your attitude. Australia isn't a colony anymore.Don't expect Britain with sunshine. It's a very different country.

We are still looking for jobs too, but we're not negative. We are still learning about the country, culture and stuff. It will all fall into place with plenty of research and given time.

Cheers,
JTL

Badge

(take cover!!)

still, personally, reckon you need

1) attitude
2) luck

and a bit of cash.

a mate said "attitude is everything - aussies give you once chance. thats it."

hevs

add to that list a couple of good mates and you've cracked it. (the poster aint so fortunate yet, so give the guy a break why dont'cha )

Pollyana

But maybe its not the attitude, maybe its pure shock. I think thats what I felt. Total SHOCK! Strange country, no friends, and in this case, sick kiddy. Some people are naturally more positive than others and find it easier to settle.
I really feel for them. I found it next to impossible to make friends at first, only succeeding through this forum and by getting a different job, after 9 months here. It wasn't a case of not wanting to fit - I wanted to belong from day one, but its not always that easy, even when you arrive thinking "I want to live here and I want to enjoy it". I should have posted some of my first e-mails on here. They were not exactly written with the rose-tinted specs on.

Guys, I admire you for posting that, and being so honest. I hope things pick up for you, and I hope that some people in the UK take it on board as being a true picture of what life MIGHT be like at first. I hope things pick up for you - please post again in a few weeks and let us know how things are. Being in Brissie I can't offer more than that, but maybe try and set up a meeting with some people off the forum - loads of them over in Perth.
Don't know how long you've been in Oz - I may have missed that bit - but I have just done my 10th month, and only now do I feel things MAY be getting easier. So stick it out, it takes time, but keep your chins up and remember the reasons you came in the first place.

Badge

anyone else got a perfect 10 story...?

stick with it mate. hey even my last month was a tad 'ordinary' (as aussies say) - still love it here though.

Simone

Hi!

Hope things get better soon!!

We'll be having another family Perth meet in October.

And us girls(ladies) meet up all the time if your wife would like to come along?
THere's new people at every meet!
Friday night we're going out in Northbridge, and lots of us haven't met yet!
Here's the thread:
http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=249965

Thursday we also have a 'coffee morning' (more like tea afternoon). Usually north of the river, cos most of us are there.
This week at Jill's(Go Banana's) in Ballajura.

Oh, and we're not all British, not that it matters, but it's a very diverse bunch, so that's good! Canadian, Australian, Dutch, South Afrikan(Sunchaser just got here, met her yesterday)

Vegemite Kids

Yep as Simone says, Lesley would be very welcome to join any of our Perth Ladies PoleDancing "cacklings". There's about 10 or 12 of us ladies now so you're bound to like one of us !!!

Also on saturday Christina ("Siren") is having a 30th birthday party at her house, and all ladies, hubbies and kiddies are invited, so please all 3 1/2 of you come along and meet us (S'ok Christina/Brian, you can thank me later for saving you the trouble of issuing the invite )

PM, me (or Simone or Siren or Swifts or Go bananas or Maggy or Jopaulss or whoever) for the address.

Teresa

Hi will echo Mairi and Simone's comments to please come along, we got meet up's planned pretty much every week now, some for just the ladies and others for the whole family, can't say how much meeting the others off the forum has helped us as the social thing is prob the hardest thing to crack.......as hevs says above and pollyanna too, they've been here a while and posts are well worth the read

juri

Thanks for the replies, encouragement and offers.
On hindsight it was a mistake to post in the first place as it was all a bit negative. The e-mail was to a good friend so I was entitled to have a whine.
I posted it to hopefully give people an insight but have realised this forum has its share of negative inputs and you don't need another. The football bit was for the benefit of the recipient as we both have a passion for it, like many people I’ve met here in Perth.
I occasionally ask Lesley if she wants to go back (to test the water. I don’t) and always get the answer ‘Not at all’, the place is fantastic.
We’ve been here eight months, moved twice once after three weeks and again last month from South to North so we’ve been a bit unsettled especially our three year old (four next month).
He has been in good health and it was only a bit of mild food poisoning that night.
I had no job to come to and got work within two weeks of arrival by getting off my arse and personally going round workplaces. I have had two jobs in a competitive industry and only moved because the first one was casual and I could not get a mortgage. Both jobs have been hard work and not particularly enjoyable as I have had to go back to tools from a supervisory role. I think I settled in well and got past the three month ‘trial’ periods easily.
Just trying to point out that my attitude is fine (Though I might be a bit sensitive to criticism - lol.).
I used to read this forum and poo poo all the whingers too, but the post was an honest, up front, reflection of how we’re doing at the moment and remember it was an e-mail to a friend.
The city and the weather are great, in the UK we used to save up all year to go on a two week holiday to the sunny beaches here you just jump in the car after work. The wages / cost of living, not so good. ‘Land of opportunity’ I don’t think so. Not these days. Not in Perth. Not unless you are a builder or hairdresser.
Once again thanks for the offers girls. Lesley is up the duff at the moment and a bit house bound, but we'll bear it in mind for the future.

babybella

Hey,
I found this a very frank and open post. I Found it so hard to make friends in the UK, even my next door neighbour did not talk to me in the play ground, I spent a couple of weeks in misery before I though I have to talk to them, be friendly and take knock backs. Now I have a great set of friends that I will be sad to leave. I believe a move to a new town in UK or to Aus/NZ really is no different, you do not know where anything is or anyone. It really takes time and effort and you have to make the effort,these people already have their family and friends around them. But I made the effort and found rich rewards.
Take hart
KAZ

Grayling

Juri

You carry on posting what you like

There is nothing wrong with 'negative' posts. They are your experience and every bit as valid as the 'I'm here and it's all wonderful' posts.

There are plenty of people who posted Glowing reports on arrival but changed their tune when things did not work out.

Everyone's circumstances are different and each account is valuable for the rest of us.

Best wishes

G

Pollyana

The question is whats the difference between a 'negative' post and a post by someone who is here, intends to stay here, and is just having problems to start with.
Posting that everything here is wonderful is OK, if thats your experience, but everyones experiences are different, and even one person can feel totally up one day and down the next. Thats life - thats the migration experience - and thats what people need to be ready for when they get here Its very interesting to read all the different experiences of newbies, and it helps you realise that not everyone has the same reaction to such a life-changing move.
Good luck Juri - keep posting