Upset family - how did it go for you?
Jan 13th 2006, 12:06 pm
#16
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Oct 2005
Location: Mandurah Perth
Posts: 366
Re: Upset family - how did it go for you?
Originally Posted by Vernons
Hi
Feeling very down today. We told family on the weekend of our decision to apply and it has not gone down well. Understandably they are upset and it is a horrible time. We are both feeling terrible but are sticking to our decision. What have your experiences been like and how did you stay focused and positive when you know you are upsetting the people in the world you don't want to upset? We want to be excited and happy (although the computer still might say no) but feel like we can't be, it is a heavy weight on our shoulders.
Feeling very down today. We told family on the weekend of our decision to apply and it has not gone down well. Understandably they are upset and it is a horrible time. We are both feeling terrible but are sticking to our decision. What have your experiences been like and how did you stay focused and positive when you know you are upsetting the people in the world you don't want to upset? We want to be excited and happy (although the computer still might say no) but feel like we can't be, it is a heavy weight on our shoulders.
When i told my family they where happy but not happy
Best friend of 31yrs was not happy and was wishing i would not get my visa because she would miss me so much (oh what i good friend i must be
). When we got our visa i did not phone her so i phoned her husband cause i knew how she would react.
When he phoned her she just sat down and started crying.
At the New Year party she kept going on about it .
My sister is so scared of spiders and my friend was going to tell her about how there are load of them.
If she knew she would never ever come over to visit me.
Thought that was going to be the end of a long friendship.
Well apart from that we are moving over in May with our 2 dogs then in October my mum and sister are coming over for 3 months and my other sister,niece and nephew are coming over for 1 month over Christmas so we will all be together.
Now all they talk about is coming over for their holidays every year so they are all happy.
Apart from my friend.
Beth
Jan 13th 2006, 12:46 pm
#17
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Nov 2005
Location: at the bottom of a wine glass
Posts: 28,176
Re: Upset family - how did it go for you?
Try to tell them all the reasons you want to go, and work on the old "don't you want what's best for us" line.
My kids always get what they want when they lay on the guilt trips!!
Also tell them about all the cheap Oz holidays they are going to get, that one worked for us.
My kids always get what they want when they lay on the guilt trips!!
Also tell them about all the cheap Oz holidays they are going to get, that one worked for us.
Jan 13th 2006, 2:16 pm
#18
karma? You make your own!
Joined: Dec 2005
Location: Brisbane (since April 2006)
Posts: 324
Re: Upset family - how did it go for you?
Originally Posted by Vernons
Hi
Feeling very down today. We told family on the weekend of our decision to apply and it has not gone down well. Understandably they are upset and it is a horrible time. We are both feeling terrible but are sticking to our decision. What have your experiences been like and how did you stay focused and positive when you know you are upsetting the people in the world you don't want to upset? We want to be excited and happy (although the computer still might say no) but feel like we can't be, it is a heavy weight on our shoulders.
Feeling very down today. We told family on the weekend of our decision to apply and it has not gone down well. Understandably they are upset and it is a horrible time. We are both feeling terrible but are sticking to our decision. What have your experiences been like and how did you stay focused and positive when you know you are upsetting the people in the world you don't want to upset? We want to be excited and happy (although the computer still might say no) but feel like we can't be, it is a heavy weight on our shoulders.
My parents were totally OK with me living in the den of vice called Amsterdam for 10 years, and when when I saw them in Jan 2005, I told them about my plans to move further afield. I decided to tell them face to face, and did not get much of a reaction, which was exactly what I expected. I did not do much more until September when I started some looking around, and I got a job offer pretty quickly. When I was back to see them in October, I told them that something was more than likely going to happen, I was totally blown away by the response.
My mother was very supportive, but my father really reacted badly. Coming with anything he could to make out that Australia is a bad place, and Australians are terrible, especially to the POMs, etc, etc. It took me by surprise, to the extent that I decided to change my Christmas plans to have it with them, to work on pacifying the situation. Christmas was hard work, with both direct and indirect negatives, and also directed to my partner when I was out for a days fishing. To cap it all, when we left to drive back to Amsterdam, he wasn't going to come out and say goodbye.
Considering he's never been there, and I've been to Australia many times, and one of my best friends is a Queenslander, and I've known the company who made me the job opening very well for several years, so his approach is not working.
I got a positive assessment on my ACS RPL yesterday, which was the key to my Employee Sponsored Visa, and phoned to tell them before he got home from work because I dreaded telling him my good news.
Anyhow, I'm still going, hopefully in March, and I feel better just typing this and reading through it!
(excellent to see the west country connection. I'm from Gloucester!).
Jan 13th 2006, 3:29 pm
#19
Sunshine Coast -Yeepee!!
Thread Starter
Joined: Dec 2005
Location: Sunshine Coast - Oh yea!!
Posts: 464
Re: Upset family - how did it go for you?
Originally Posted by Vernons
Hi
Feeling very down today. We told family on the weekend of our decision to apply and it has not gone down well. Understandably they are upset and it is a horrible time. We are both feeling terrible but are sticking to our decision. What have your experiences been like and how did you stay focused and positive when you know you are upsetting the people in the world you don't want to upset? We want to be excited and happy (although the computer still might say no) but feel like we can't be, it is a heavy weight on our shoulders.
Feeling very down today. We told family on the weekend of our decision to apply and it has not gone down well. Understandably they are upset and it is a horrible time. We are both feeling terrible but are sticking to our decision. What have your experiences been like and how did you stay focused and positive when you know you are upsetting the people in the world you don't want to upset? We want to be excited and happy (although the computer still might say no) but feel like we can't be, it is a heavy weight on our shoulders.
Thank you to all of you who have replied, it has helped. I am a school teacher and have been on a course today so could not reply. The site is great for reminding people why they are doing things. I am moving from feeling sad, to guilty to angry over the whole situation. I am also a bit paranoid that members of the family might look at this site as we mentioned how helpful it is so I can't express my true feelings!!!!! :scared:
