lissyqq

Hi
Me and my new husband are currently inthe process of visa applications and are ready for the last stage medicals and police checks. I will be leaving my two sons behind aged 22 & 19 and am really struggling with this but they have made thier mind up that they dont want to come. Im on a roller coaster of emotions at the minute and not even got the visa yet Is this normal?

bakedbean

Hi and welcome to the forum

Yes...moving abroad is always a rollercoaster but it's also a big life adventure so enjoy.

Do check out the Australia section of the forum and join in with a few threads. Maybe start up a few topics of your own and fire away with any questions you may have. Hope it all goes well.

paganlady58

Hello Lissyqq.

Have you ever been to Australia? Whereabouts are you coming to?
We have been here from the UK for the four years of hubby's 457 visa and are now relocating to Canada. Life is hard when you leave your kids, whatever age they are. But, as they say, go for it. I hope you really enjoy Australia, we have found it to be a wonderful and spectacular place to be.

lissyqq

Hiya
I have never been but my husband has and he loved it. He wants a better life for us. It would be so much easier if the boys were coming but they have to make thier own decisions now. Hopefully they may change thier mind in a year or 2. We are looking to move to the Sunshine coast in Queensland as that is where my hubby got sponsorship. Did you leave children behind? I really want this but my emotions are everywhere

paganlady58

I do urge you to really consider the real facts before you come over here Lissyqq; You hope to move to where we live at the moment, on the Sunshine Coast in QLD. We are in what must be one of the most beautiful and stunning parts of the world and the scenery is breathtaking. Temperatures are sub-tropical and the humidity is extreme and very hard to endure.
I will list some negatives that you REALLY need to consider carefully before moving out here:
The cost of property either buying or selling is ridiculous. Rental rules here are all for the owners with the tenants often getting a raw deal. There are often very few properties available to rent;.
The cost of living is very high, as is the case with most of Aus these days. It is higher than in the UK.
The humidity is unbearable - unless you live somewhere with a pool the air con will be on ALL of the time, fans just don't cut it. Just getting out the shower and getting into bed will leave you bathed in sweat in the 'summer' (it only rains in the summer!). You need to either wring your clothes out or change around 3 times a day if not in an air cooled environment.
Power bills are going through the roof, literally. Most houses here on the Sunny Coast are dark to keep out the sun so you need lights and air con on most of the time. Some houses have solar power but it is a long way off being a cheap power source.
We are here on a 475 skilled working visa and my hubby has had his overtime cut completely and now his working hours cut. It is often the way here. They want your skills but they don't want to pay for them.
If you are over 45 you can forget about getting a job. I am a 40 years skilled NHS qualified manager and I cannot get a job here, I am too old. Australia does not want you if you are over the hill.
Medical costs are very high as is the cost of medical insurance, especially if you are here on a visa which we are. Each GP visit will cost you around $70 dollars, (some of which you will get back though).
Aussie drivers - defy any words of explanation. A dangerous law unto themselves. Most of them should not be allowed in front of a wheel - not a day passes without several 'near misses' just because of stupidity - which seems to be the norm. Dash cam sales are booming here....
Aussies are on the whole nice people, but lazy, arrogant, aggressive and bad tempered. And racist. Road rage is the norm here. The laid back attitude only appears to apply to their attitude to doing anything difficult.
We have many of the world's deadliest snakes here in Aus. The main three can be found in our back yard on a daily basis; Eastern brown snake, red bellied black snake and the deadly Taipan.
Spiders. The huge ones (Huntsman) don't kill you, but there are many little ones that can. Also found in all our back yards, houses, cars etc.
Bushfires. These are a common and very, very scary occurrence.

Skype and internet coverage is less than optimal on the Sunny Coast in particular and it is not so easy to keep in touch with your lads in the UK. We have problems with internet outage on a weekly basis and are with the supposedly best supplier, Telstra.

Please think about these things carefully before you make the jump.

quoll

Hmm, if you can view this as just another adventure then go for it but the tired old "better life" cop out - load of baloney! It's going to be different living in a foreign country away from all the social connections you have accrued over a lifetime but not magically "better". Your kids may well not be able to "change their minds" and follow you unless they have skills which might entitle them to visas in future. It sounds like your visa is only going to be temporary anyway if your DH has got sponsorship and there is no guarantee that it will be ongoing or permanent. Be prepared for the isolation and need to be really out there making new connections but meanwhile being very self contained and self reliant.

I have kids on the other side of the world and sure it's possible and you develop a sort of out of sight/out of mind mentality after a while but you still worry and when the grandkids come along Skype really doesn't cut it!

My advice is always nog to burn any bridges - take a career break, don't quit a permanent job! Rent out the house rather than selling it etc and view it as a short term adventure and you'll probably be ok. If it becomes long term and permanent and you are enjoying life then you win. If it all goes pear shaped then rethink your life direction. It's just another first world country after all. Good luck!

lissyqq

Wow at lot to consider and a lot of negative points. I disagree that the better life is baloney to be honest as we are looking at how our life is at the minute and we know that it will be better for us personally.I guess its down to the individual on whether its a better life or not Most of the people who I have spoken to have said that you have a better lifestyle, better outdoor living, weather and to be fair if I don't like it then we will just come home. Its better to have tried than wished I guess! From what I can see its like Marmite you either love it our hate it but you cant decide until you have tried it. My outlook on life is its all just one big adventure!

I"m not sure about the spiders and snakes though that scares the hell out of me as I will be bringing me two dogs over as well so that is a big worry!
Thanks for the pointers there's a lot to think about

old.sparkles

I'm enjoying life here - it's a lot brighter, more space, better weather etc. We're not in QLD so don't get the humidity, but do get some very hot days.

I did leave 2 adult children in the UK, and also my grandson. I just keep paying for them to visit We Skype, use FB or talk on the phone to keep in touch. We're about to move to a 4 bed house with a pool - big change from a ex council house terrace in a not so good area.

We had an okay life in the UK too - and if we get fed up with this, we can always go back. I got a 3 year career break form my employer - 2 down and 1 to go but I like my job here too. Didn't have a job to come over to and had to jump through a few hoops being a spark but all good now. Killed a few spiders - made a midnight message to a friend to check on what to do with a huntsman in the loo - but not seen any snakes yet. Watch out for the roos though - they do not move out of the way of cars!

joeyballantyne

paganlady - i dont know where you're living on the sunny coast - but you should probably move to another area of the coast - it sounds terrible! i live in caloundra and to balance what you wrote for lissqq here's my 'negatives'
The cost of property either buying or selling is ridiculous.it will cost probably 500k for a decent house on the sunny coast - depending on what 'decent' means to you - i'm meaning 4 beds, double garage kinda decent. But research that your self lissyqq - there's many area'pockets where good houses can be cheaper, and yes the commission real estate agents charge is high cos 2 - 4% or whatever percentage of the house sale will seem a lot especially for a house thats 500k ....or you live within your means and be frugal buying a much smaller/cheaper house. also there is no 'cost' to buying a house - well certainly no realestate agents fees, but there'll be mortgage fees etc.
Rental rules here are all for the owners with the tenants often getting a raw deal.
i've rented about 7 times so far since living here - if you look after the place you're in you'll be fine, but yes if you damage anything or are late with rent payments the agents seem to be very unsympathetic. on the other hand i have friends who are landlords and they have to put up with ridiculous "s**t that tenants do to their properties - 6 of one, half dozen...
There are often very few properties available to rent;.
true but mainly depending on the suburb, sunny coast has lots of desirable burbs so there'll always be competition for those sought after rentals - read up on the process, get ready to 'play the game' - have all your documents ready to go, and your money, as soon as the property is advertised dont wait for the inspection dates see if you can make an application - its a race people!
The cost of living is very high, as is the case with most of Aus these days. It is higher than in the UK.
the jury is still out on that - SOME things cost more, others are in proportion with your earning - and most people will earn more in oz than they did in the uk (in pound/dollar figures) - so if my shopping now comes to $250 for a family of four that as a percentage of my weekly wage should still be close to my shopping bill percentage of wage back home - basically yes things cost more but most people here earn more - kids are earning $15 an hour! we're almost talking monopoly money here!
The humidity is unbearable - unless you live somewhere with a pool the air con will be on ALL of the time, fans just don't cut it. Just getting out the shower and getting into bed will leave you bathed in sweat in the 'summer' (it only rains in the summer!). You need to either wring your clothes out or change around 3 times a day if not in an air cooled environment.
not everyone on the sunny coast sweats like an angry farmer - not everyone struggles in the heat - in fact some people who are from hotter climes start wearing their beanie hats the day summer ends - but yes the humidity is legendary. legendary as in 'f**k it's too hot' - the summer months can seem unbearable and i too have sucummed to aircon anywhere it can be found e.g. shopping centres, the car etc - i agree with you paganlady - get aircon in your house...or a pool, but aircon is better, and no you dont have to have it on alllll the time.
Power bills are going through the roof, literally. Most houses here on the Sunny Coast are dark to keep out the sun so you need lights and air con on most of the time. Some houses have solar power but it is a long way off being a cheap power source.
my bills havent changed that much, yes they're more than previous years but so are our wage packets, i dont agree they're going thro the roof - again its all relative to income in my opinion - solar power has been a great saviour and savour for many of my friends - i have to disagree paganlady, my friends that have it are saving bucketloads, and in some cases have minimal energy bills - this has slowed down recently due to recent changes in funding/incentives to get solar, but jeez the sunny coast is the place to have solar hey? edit: lissqq - houses arent dark - some people keep their blinds/shades closed when it gets really hot, that helps to keep the house cool - if you go and look at rental properties you will notice they will probably have blinds/shades closed to keep the place cool in hot weather.
We are here on a 475 skilled working visa and my hubby has had his overtime cut completely and now his working hours cut. It is often the way here. They want your skills but they don't want to pay for them.
i think thats too much of a sweeping statement and definitely does not apply to all employers, i can only talk for myself and my many friends how have good employers that value them.
If you are over 45 you can forget about getting a job. I am a 40 years skilled NHS qualified manager and I cannot get a job here, I am too old. Australia does not want you if you are over the hill.
have to disagree again - this is more dependant on 'fit' for the job - especially on the sunny coast - we have one of the highest unemployment rates at 6.something % - globally thats not the end of the world but can feel like it to job seekers. employers here will choose the best person for the job - you will struggle to get a job if you are over qualified/overexperienced as there are plenty of non-qualified/lacking-experience jobseekers flocking to the coast. in a tight job market you have to work out what jobs suit your skills and experience, or how your skills can transfer into a different job NB some jobs that you may have had in the uk dont event exist on the sunny coast - that can be a massive shock to the system. either way the resume has to be a particular way and the cover letter too. there's a big 'hidden job market' on the sunny coast and more people get jobs making expressions of interest for jobs that arent being advertised, than people just applying to advertised jobs - i am an example as is my partner and many friends (and clients - i help people get jobs)
Medical costs are very high as is the cost of medical insurance, especially if you are here on a visa which we are. Each GP visit will cost you around $70 dollars, (some of which you will get back though).
yes doc visit $50-70 - i dont actually think that is high - my opinion - i'm glad i dont have to go often.
Aussie drivers - defy any words of explanation. A dangerous law unto themselves. Most of them should not be allowed in front of a wheel - not a day passes without several 'near misses' just because of stupidity - which seems to be the norm. Dash cam sales are booming here....
haha - i dont think your country of origin relates to your 's**t driving - i really dont think you can only pin this on aussies, to be fair paganlady there's no way you can tell a persons nationality while they're hooning all around you - and remember the pom numbers are growing strongly all the time on the sunny coast.
Aussies are on the whole nice people, but lazy, arrogant, aggressive and bad tempered. And racist. Road rage is the norm here. The laid back attitude only appears to apply to their attitude to doing anything difficult.
this made me smile paganlady - you could be talking about any town/country in the world here - i've lived in lots of places around the uk - yep definitely describes most of them - lazy arrogant and aggressive AND bad tempered?! - i think we need to get you into the sunny coast witness protection program.
We have many of the world's deadliest snakes here in Aus. The main three can be found in our back yard on a daily basis; Eastern brown snake, red bellied black snake and the deadly Taipan. Spiders. The huge ones (Huntsman) don't kill you, but there are many little ones that can. Also found in all our back yards, houses, cars etc. yes again depending where you live you'll get lots ....or no snakes - check out 'sunshine coast snake catcher' on facebook -everyday he's hustling snakes - but i live in caloundra, with a very big yard, not far from scrub land, living on a former flood plain, and in 10 years have not had/seen a snake., and i've seen one massive huntsman in 10 years, beautiful thing too, lissyqq most people in the burbs will get 'pested' that means houses can be sprayed to keep pests and insects away.

Bushfires. These are a common and very, very scary occurrence.
not common on the sunny coast, in fact we havent had one for years, was scary though, back in 2006 i think in pelican waters mainly in bush and no property was lost, the firies did a fantastic job

Skype and internet coverage is less than optimal on the Sunny Coast in particular and it is not so easy to keep in touch with your lads in the UK. We have problems with internet outage on a weekly basis and are with the supposedly best supplier, Telstra.
we use skype, whatapp and fb, and whatever else we can to stay in touch, works great where we are on all devices with great connection.

lissqq i hope that gives a bit of balance, i dont disagree entirely with paganlady but definitely have different views on life here on the sunshine coast - on the issue of you leaving your sons behind, i can relate to that after leaving my 22 year old behind and wishing he had come - but reality is that you can't live for other people, i believe you have to live for yourself, and as you have said you wont know if you dont give it a go - great spirit as then you really cant have any regrets - better to give it a good go hey? and i'm still here after 10 years, when we came we said lets give it a go. I'm still giving it a go

the troubadour

I'd agree with paganlady58 there is certainly a strong degree of ageism in the work place in Australia but is it really so much different from else where? Just be in mind that economic conditions are changing rather rapidly and allow for a return if all goes belly up.

Although 457's do go on to permanent residence in considerable numbers it is far from guaranteed. Especially in the coming future economic climate.

My view to house prices are hardly secret. They are among the most overinflated in the world. I agree the rental market can be the devil as well if dealing with intrusive agency inspections and yes the rights are skewered towards the landlord at the expense of the renter compared to other countries. Stores up the high house prices I suppose, if only the young could afford to break in.

BadgeIsBack

I liked the pros and cons of QLD living : my view is that negative stories can inflate very, very rapidly, - with the story growing with the telling.

Aus real estate is high. It is more humid in QLD than down south.
In Melbourne, we often keep our blinds closed on the hottest days but it's only a handful of days a year. It seems owners of new builds without eaves who have to run AC alot. I don't see ageism as a problem - only some jobs transfer better than others. In QLD, the bushfire season starts earlier and finishes earlier but it's further down south the real danger lies.

Much of what I gather about QLD is that parts of it can be a very transient existence with a high turnover in the work force.

I don't generally trust people who claim to live in constant danger with the wildlife - but maybe it is worse in QLD.

As for driving, in Melbourne at least, it is certainly no worse than London.
Again, I wonder where people have been living if they think Australians are particularly bad - Australian cities and regions can be very busy places and it is a car culture. Add in traffic lights and grid systems and it can be very monotonous.

Does it have to be QLD?

steen1976

I drove a lot in the UK in my last job and will say that I think Australian drivers are very poor. But the worst of them are the Asians. Certainly in Sydney. We've been very close to being cleaned off on three occasions by them. On the whole they are not at all courteous drivers but probably no worse to drivers in southern England.

spouse of scouse

Aussies are on the whole nice people, but lazy, arrogant, aggressive and bad tempered. And racist.

I learn something new about myself every day on BE. I take heart on this occasion though, because even though I'm lazy, arrogant, aggressive, bad tempered and racist, I'm still a nice person

spouse of scouse

Hi lissy - I'd say that not feeling any emotion at leaving your 19 and 22 year olds would be far more abnormal You've obviously given them the choice, and you can't control the one they make. If their Dad is in the UK then at least they'll have someone to keep an eye on them. Like anything in life, you can only do your best.

lissyqq

Thank you for all the advice guys. Some of the stuff people have commented on sort of relates to where I live in the uk! Arrogant, rude aggressive, so at least I will have a few home comforts � ����� ����. I see most of the comments regarding renting is negative which is a bit of a worry as we will be renting to start. I understand there is going to be as many bad points as good but I guess that's the same if you were to go anywhere in the world. Our plan is 2 years and then see what happens anymore advice would be appreciated � ����