JD1963

I never thought it could happen to me but 7 months ago my stepson who is 33 dumped his girl friend for another girl who just happened to be an evangelist. She told him that if he wants to be with her that he would have to convert to her religion.

At first he went to a couple of their meetings/church and came back saying that they were all crazy and making jokes about them. But slowly he came around to their way of thinking and now he's as bad as them! His mother has made so many sacrifices for him. She had worked very hard throughout her life to give him the best, she's not rich, but what she had she lovingly gave to him. Now he has turned against all his family saying they are all sinners and should ask God for forgiveness blah blah blah.

He blames his mother for having an argument with her ex husband (his father), when he was a child, he recalls that in her anger she smashed some plates during the argument!! It's incredible, he has been spoilt and now he plays the part of a victim. When he marries this girl and if they should have a family, his mother, my wife, won't be allowed to see his children because his pastor says that we could have an affect on the child's beliefs!! In other words they believe in stuff such as creationism and we don't so she has to keep away from her future grandchildren in case she influences their beliefs!!

Many years ago, his father signed his house over in his son's name. It's a large house in a very nice neighborhood in town. The father also lives with his ageing mother. Now he intends to sell the house and put his father and grandmother into a little flat. Then he will give 10% of the sale of the house to the pastor. I have met the pastor and i can honestly say that he is a nasty and devious person. He preaches about christian love and it's the last thing on his mind. He's in it for the money, everybody can see it except my stepson. We don't see him much as he has been persuaded by the pastor and his future wife to stay away from us, obviously we might say something to wake him up which could mean that the pastor loses his meal ticket.

My wife has put up with a lot of crap in her life, but this has really broken her and thrown her into a depression. Personally i have no interest if her son gives everything to the pastor, i am sick of his verbal put downs and insults to someone i care a lot about. He wants an easy ride in life and is happy for everyone to carry him through his life, while he blames everyone, even those who have helped him. Yet he has let the one person who has never done anything for him, the pastor, control his life and destroy his family connections.

ononno

I do sympathise with you, but have no real advice I can offer. Although the son and grandson of Methodist lay preachers, I married a Catholic and foreigner to boot. You can imagine the consternation that caused 53 years ago. It took 4 years to get my father to speak to me again. My children were brought up as Italian Catholics; I didn't try in any way to influence their beliefs, whilst sticking to my own fairly 'agnostic' ones. As they grew up each made their own choices. So we have one strongly Catholic son, whose children are growing up as 1 very religious young boy, and a girl who has hotfooted it to the UK and wants nothing to do with religion. We also have a son with 4 children in Catholic Ireland who all go to, or have been to, multi denominational schools. All seem disinterested in religion. It is a sad fact that acceptance of any religion eliminates the need for serious thought. (cit - son no. 3)
bye bye dicette l'inglese

HADENOUGHPIZZA

Perhaps the ex husband / father can have a close look at the documents that were signed when he gave up his rights to the house ? Some forms of '' donazione '' can be reversed and there may also be a clause giving him and his mother the right to live there . Its not exactly a sellers market and a couple of sitting tennants won't help .This is Italy and getting an elderly woman out of her home against her wishes wil be no easy matter . If they dig in their heels they could delay things till the son comes to his senses

Isakat

JD, what a horrible situation for all to be in, especially your wife who has sacrificed so much for her son and now is treated in an awful way.

It is obvious that the church has brainwashed your stepson and he needs to be woken up from this religious fog.

The first thing I would do is contact a solicitor ASAP and see what can be done by law:
-if there is anything that can be done to reverse the donation, especially that he intends to move his father and grandma out. I would believe there must be some clause that the father should stay in the house till his death?

-if anything can be done legally against the pastor wanting 10% of the sale.


The more information you get, the more arms you have against the church/pastor.With the law on your side, the religious nutty girlfriend might drop him once they realize they can not gain financially. Is she Italian?

And are the Evangelists the ones who cure people on TV?( Sorry, I am not religious).