For prosperity and for anyone that's interested (!) I thought I would record our birth story on here.  Of course, it wasn't without its dramas!

On Thursday night, I barely slept a wink.  My cold was bad and I was full of anxiety about the following day.  At 4am I drifted off to sleep and was awoken by one of Steve's many alarms (!!) at 6am.  I niavely thought my head would feel better, but I felt even worse.  It was like my head had been tightened in a vice overnight.  I was blurry, tired and all stuffy.  We set about getting ready and explaining to the girls how the day would pan out.  The Nanny arrived early at 7am and got stuck in with the girls.  There was no doubt about us using her over the weekend.  She was awesome and I felt really relaxed about leaving her alone.  We set off for the hospital, Steve and I barely spoke in the car, just held hands and tried to make sense of what was about to happen.  When we arrived at the hospital we were taken to room 5, the same room I'd been in just a few weeks ago when I had the scare.  The only difference was that the bed had been replaced with a 'labour bed' and there were towels and all sorts of other bits on hand.  Excitement and adrenaline started to take over.  My OB arrived and introduced me to the midwife who would tend to me during my stay.  The process of what to expect was outlined to me.  The OB would break my waters, I'd have an hour to walk around and bring on contractions and if nothing happened, they would introduce syntocin to bring on labour.  I reiterated again my desire to try the epidural as this time I was keen for a relaxed and painless labour.  At 8.30am the OB broke my waters and Steve and I started roaming the corridors.  I told Steve that I should have been wrapped up in bed with tea as I feeling so bad - not walking up and down a flight of stairs!  It was crazy business! I did wonder about my capacity to reserve energy for later on.  I returned to the room an hour later and reported that there wasn't one single contraction.  I sat down, and then it started!  Sporadic and not terribly painful at 5-8 mins apart.  Fortunately the syntocin drip wasn't needed.  They called the Anaesthetist, a lovely young man called, Alex.  He came and talked to us about the epidural.  I didn't know much about it, only that I wanted something to take the edge off and as far as I knew, the epidural was the only thing that wouldn't effect the baby.  It was important to me though that I didn't lose the feeling totally and had some mobility in my legs.  He said he would give me a weak epi, and stood and answered all of my questions that I quick fired at him.  It is my SPINE afterall!  I was surprised that the setup time took about 20 mins, and then he was fishing around in my spine.  The contractions were still coming during all of this.  I felt happy that we'd got it in time.  However, I continued to feel the contractions and sure enough, Alex was called back.  I could feel dripping down my back and sure enough the catherter thing had popped out of my spine!  I had to endure the whole process again to get another put in, which wasn't terribly easy with the contractions.  By now it was lunctime.  I was feeling very weary, sore and started to question my ability to follow through with this labour.  My midwife, Rachel was awesome.  She had a dry sense of humour and we got on extremely well - makes it that much easier!  My blood pressure stayed consistent so they were able to keep topping up my epi.  However, I was STILL in pain!  Rachel told me I had the amount of drugs in me to numb a horse!  Half an hour later - I had enough in me to numb an elephant!  The epi had slowed down my ability to move my legs, numbed my belly and hips, but I could feel my cervix and I could feel the contractions!  Great, only the outside of me was numb!  Not the bit that matters!  Alex said it was rare, but for some people, the epidural just didn't work properly.  There was nothing else to do except offer me a spinal - which I definitely didn't want.  So time dragged on, the midwife got me some gas and air and I was started to feel very emotional.  I was too tired to scream in pain, I was actually trying to nap in the three minutes between contractions.  I struggled to focus.  I really did feel weak and tired.  I felt the baby move down the birth canal and knew it was time to push.  The contractions - although painful didn't move closer together, so I was at a loss to use them to help with the labour.  It was very emotional for me.  I had to find a focus.  My OB had arrived back and her and the midwife tried to help guide me through the process.  The midwife was monitoring the heartbeat - which had stayed healthy, but I noticed her tone taking  a slightly different edge, presumably as labour was stalling with the baby lodged in the birth canal, the baby was finally not feeling so great about the whole thing. I could picture this baby stuck in there, and told myself that she needed me and I needed to get her out.  I pictured hearing her first scream and how badly I wanted to hear her and have her with me.  I pushed and pushed, I have to say that of all of them, this was by the far the hardest labour.  I had planned for this one to be breezy, but it didn't go to plan at all and being so ill had such a huge impact.  Finally at 3.41pm after six hours of labour, Ella came out into the world.  She was really blue and made a few grunting noises.  She was popped on my belly and I said, she's not breathing properly.  The OB was busy tidying me up down there, and the midwife was scuttling around getting towels, etc.  No one seemed to hear me, but I kept on muttering, she's too blue, she's not breathing properly.  I was so overwhelmed and struggling to focus, but I wanted someone to notice that something wasn't quite right.  Finally, the midwife decided to call the peaditrician to check the breathing.  The ped said it might be from getting cold and having a sluggish start.  I should try feeding her and seeing if that kick's start her.  Feeding wasn't a concern, she latched on straight away and got stuck in!  When things had settled a bit, I asked Steve to pop and get some food and drink.  I was beside myself with hunger and thirst.  He went on his way and the ped returned.  She said she was concerned that Ella's breathing was still not quite right and said she would take her right away to the neonatal unit to check her vitals and oxygen levels.  She started to wheel the little cot out and I had to surpress the urge to scream after her!  I called Steve on his mobile and told to him to get back.  In his panic he threw all the food down and raced back.  A midwife came in with a wheelchair and told me she'd take me up to be with my baby.  As we entered the department which every parent hopes and prays they never get to see, I had to stop myself from crying.  Lots of tiny little incubators with tiny little babies.  Parents sat faithfully next to these incubators with flashing lights and periodic bleeps, unable to hold their babies.  My heart ached for them.  The pediatricians were amazing.  Really nice people, so strong and dedicated.  There was my Ella, all wired up, being pricked and poked.  I just sat hopelessly watching.  The first tests weren't clear enough, so they had to do it again.  Incredibly the results were produced in seconds.  Levels were a little low, but not worryingly so.  Ella could leave the neonatal unit, but would have to stay overnight in the hospital in case her levels dropped, as she was vulnerable to infection.  I have to say, that initial wait was the hardest of my life.  As we left the unit, a Dr smiled at us and told us he liked these discharges.  I left the other tiny babies behind, the monitors, the anxious, dedicated parents.  It was a glimpse into a world of raw hope, strength and sadness.  Back in the room, we were all pretty exhausted!  Steve and I decided it would be best for him to head back so he could be there when the girls woke up.  Ella and I finally got to sleep, then a midwife came in and told us a bed had become available in the ward - which I'd hoped wouldn't happen!  I hate wards, post natal wards are of course the noisest!  Ella's breathing had completely stabilised by now but I felt it would be too late to go home.  The ward was awful.  70s decor.  Babies screamed like cats in a cattery.  In my ward was the token freight train snorer and the token anxious Mother that buzzed the midwife every single time her baby made a noise. There was communal toilet with an overflowing waste bin, empty soap dispenser, etc.  The kitchen was covered with notices about how to stack plates, which mugs to use, how things should be left, etc.  Ella slept peacefully while I took a midnight tour.  The tv room had an old monitor, flaking wallpaper, dirty old chairs, reminders not to steal furniture, and an half eaten packet of crisps.  Yes, this is the ward made to offer new Mums comfort and support.  Nice.  I knew I wasn't going to get any sleep here and I ached for my home, my family, my privacy, peace and all my creature comforts.  By 12.30am I was entering into negotiations with the night staff to make my escape!  By 1am I was waking up Steve to come and get me!  By 2am, I was tucked up in my own bed.  Ella went from strength to strength, feeding, sleeping, happy as a baby could be!  I've been hit with some pretty awful afterpains, which are at times, worse then contractions.  Moons is very excited about her new sister.  I was mostly worried about how Pip would react, but she's just stood and stroked the baby's hair.  I'm really proud of how nurturing she is, she's a real gentile character.  Periodically both girls will run in to say hi to the baby, and then dash off again.  The Nanny has been awesome, the girls are really settled and happy.  The house is tidy, Steve is being wonderful.  I've got lots of rest - far more then I ever did with when I had the other two.  It is SO nice to have this time recover.  My cold is STILL insanely bad!  I'm deaf in my right ear, and I'm all bunged up I can barely breathe.  I have to say, this is the worst cold ever!  Steve gave me a beautiful card in which he tells me how proud he is of me, how much he loves me and thanks me for the new baby.  Its the most beautiful card and the most beautifully written thing I have ever seen.  I really do feel so blessed.  I can't believe its all over now!  Nine months, gone in a whirl.  I've finally met my baby!  I'm just really disappointed that I can't smell her!! I would love to enjoy the new baby smell!  Squeaks coming from the bassinet!  Time to go!