| I have finally officially returned to the land of the living - although god knows how with little sleep! I can finally eat, I have some more energy and I'm back in focus. Yesterday was really bad, quite a few things happened that I found very upsetting, one was totally my fault. I dropped Moons off at school and some boy who was far too big to be at preschool came up and shoved Moons really hard. There were no teachers around and I just snapped. I grabbed that little punk by the scruff of his neck and told him if he ever touched my daughter again I would knock his head off. I then frog marched Moons out of the school ranting about how awful it was. Moons was very disappointed, she was looking forward to seeing her friends! I drove home in tears, I couldn't believe I just threatened a kid! I felt dreadful, and I was also very worried, he would tell the teachers that a Mother came in and threatened him! Eek! I called the school manager as soon as I got home and told her what had happened. I said I wasn't happy with the fact that no one was around, there was no control and who was this unruly boy. Turns out he's the school's bully and they've been having trouble with him being rough with the younger children. I suddenly thought about how this boy has probably been exposed to violence at home and I have just basically made it worse. I sat Moons down and told her what Mummy did was wrong, and she said I had really scared the boy. I told her she must always tell a teacher and that touching someone was always wrong. I was so emotional and I went online and Steve was there. Turned out he'd been wrenched out of his sleep by this strong urge to check in and see if we were OK! Excellent timing. We talked it through until I felt a bit better. The rest of the day struggled on. I was drained and needed sleep, but Moons wouldn't let me! Pip wakes up at 3am every morning without fail and makes lots of noise until sunrise. Twice moons has come into my bedroom and asked to sleep with me because she's afraid of monsters. We're all kind of bumbling along with no sleep! Its good preparation for the baby I guess! Yesterday I really was gripped with hormones and cried and felt irritable all day. We popped to the shops and I'm sure people must have thought 'poor cow' as I waddled around. Dressed in Steve's baggy clothes, big hair, trying to pack the car, load the kids and deal with demands of sweets. The evening couldn't come around quick enough! Last night Moons came in at 1am, I dozed off as Steve rang. He's brought the flight forward, thank you know what for that! He now arrives on Saturday morning. Moons couldn't sleep after the call and refused to get into her own room, so I ended up sneaking out and trying to grab a few zzzzs in Moons room. Small bed, lots of toys - not an ideal night's sleep! Listening to Pip in the office playing and screaming. I'm meeting a friend for lunch today, its a lovely Autumn day and I intend to enjoy it and relax. |