Me leaving the job so soon created a real unexpected dip in our finances.  Steve had previously looked at economist roles in Welly, assuming that this would be the place they'd be needed!  He was wrong and what positions there are pay very low.  Just out of interest last week he looked into contract jobs similiar to what he's doing in the UK and was amazed to discover that his skills are in great demand, so much so, he can pretty much write his own pay packet!  Being contract means he can take time out when he needs to focus on the UK job.  Such as this upcoming trip back.  We were so elated to discover this, he had no idea how good his skills were!  He's seeing a couple of recruitment agencies this week, its unfortunate that he can't really arrange anything because of leaving, but when he gets back, he'll leave the NZ job and get stuck in.  This weekend, I watched the Coronation Street omnibus as its finally caught up to where we left it in the UK, afterwards I'm afraid to admit but I cried like a baby!  The overwhelming emotion of homesickness.  In all my years of travelling I have never had it like I have in NZ.  Steve is sure I'm only homesick because we're in NZ and if were anywhere else in the world, I wouldn't feel it so bad.  I think he may be right.  Right now, the UK seems so perfect compared to NZ.  Caught in the emotion I begged Steve to let us sell everything and get the hell of here.  I completely understand why British expats come here and love it so much, I like to hear Jac and Adie talk about it, its such a raw passion for NZ and I only wish I could feel it too.  We drove around some of the suburbs over the weekend to stave off boredom and it all just seemed so bland to me.  I remembered Mexico City, the sounds and smells, how every time you look out the window, you see something different.  How Steve and I could be in hysterics with some of the things we didn't expect!  We watched Man On Fire over the weekend I really enjoyed seeing places we had visited and even lived near!  Such a vibrant culture, such proud people.  Such a truly, beautiful place.  I'm disappointed that I seem to have lost my Spanish.  Its something else to live in a country and be forced to speak another language.  Really makes you feel awake.  You could lose yourself in Mexico City, your own life was so insignificant, you were really a face in the crowd.  And I liked it, sitting outside a cafe, watching the world go by.  The poverty stricken in amongst the filthy rich, the Lincoln Navigators with tinted windows (usually drug dealers) in amongst the green 'botcho' (VW bug taxis) where the driver pulls the door shut with a tired piece of string!  I would love to be in a position to get a holiday home there.  I'm not sure I could live there again with three children - far too much stress!  My sister had mentioned in passing over the telephone that she'd heard Canada had made stricter criteria on gaining permanant residency.  When I did the online test a few years ago, Steve and I just scraped by with a few points over the minimum.  Yesterday I sat and did the test again, anxious to see if our ultimate dream had become more difficult.  I was amazed to discover that, with Steve as the principle applicant we were well over the required points!  The screen flased up, 'Congratulations'  With details of persuing the application.  As much as I could fly there tomorrow, we are both anxious to ensure that we do it all properly with Canada, we don't want any stress, as Canada will become a home for us.  We definitely intend to holiday there though.  Christmas would be my preferred time of year.  In the interim, the South Island could still appeal as a 'fake canada'! 

I'm thoroughly enjoying Autumn, the coolness and the evenings, although aren't quite cold enough, I still like to have the log burner going!  We have this routine now, when the girls go to bed, we tidy the house downstairs, polish the tables, and then light lots of tea lights and the fire!  Its so cozy.  We pull the drapes closed and relax.  The only thing missing is an expensive bottle of red!  Sometimes we watch movies, sometimes we just listen to music.  We could be anywhere else in the world, we don't hear anything from outside and we can't see anybody else.  Its just the fire and candlelight.  I love it and really enjoy the evenings.

Week 18 of the pregnancy and I think I look more pregnant now.  Steve has told me I've looked pregnant for a while, but the truth is, I just looked fat!  My belly is more round and protuding now.  Still no movement from the baby though.  I hope that will happen this week.  The sickness has really tapered off, just heartburn now and I'm eating antacids like smarties at the moment.  We've explained to Moons about the baby.  She keeps shoving teddies up her t-shirt and proclaiming that she's got a baby too!  She understands that She and Pip came from my belly too, but she's also convinced that Steve was once in my belly too!  Looking forward to finding out the sex next week and I'm hoping that this will make me feel more bonded with the baby.  I guess its just because its number 3, but I'm just not feeling this pregnancy like the other two.  I guess I am so busy with two little people, my brain can't really muster more regard for the baby in my belly.  By the end of the day, I'm just chilling out and relaxing and can't be bothered to discuss baby furniture and all things baby orientated.  I guess that sounds mean, but I hope it'll change soon.