The Party
It wasn't really a party more like a gathering. We got the ball rolling in the afternoon at 2:30pm so if anyone couldn't make it at night they could come in the afternoon.
A couple of our friends came in the afternoon, and they had bought us a present which they didn't have to. I unwrapped it and it was one of them digital photo frames. I've always wanted one and I was so happy I had finally got one.
Most people came at about 6:30pm I think. I had made a display board so people could see where we were going, what you can do and info on the weather etc etc.
Most of the people that came were from Neil's side, he has a very big family. Mine only consists of my mum and my brother.
I was feeling very strange and could have come across as being ignorant. I should really try to expain it. Everything has been really hectic, trying to tye up last bits to get sorted. In the end the things you can't managed to get sorted you just think "oh well, I will just have to deal with it later" (I've had a bit of an issue with the Inland Revenue but that's another story for another day).
So anyway, things start to fall into place. So we have nothing left to sort out after months and months of planning to get to this day. Emotional roller coasters regarding the house and other issues with trying to stay positive through it all.
I'm sat here at my computer in England thinking tomorrow we will be at the airport waiting to board our plane from Manchester to Heathrow and making the long trip to Edmonton.
The point I'm trying to make about how I was feeling at the party is that after all the months of these ups and downs and now nothing is very tiring. I feel a bit drained, happy, sad, excited, anxious, just over all very very strange, your tummy churns. I am happy to be going don't get me wrong and all the way through I've been thinking, I won't cry, I won't be bothered but it hits you. I hits you like a ton of bricks.
I am not handling leaving my dog very well, this is my pet that I've had for 8 years. I love cuddling him when I'm down and just having general moans to him (well he can't talk back can he). I love the smell of him at the top of his head and to kiss him just at the top of his ear where it is all soft and fluffy. People were saying at the party your really going to miss him arn't you. Yes I am, I had to ask one person not to ask me about him as I could feel myself getting upset. I was just so tired last night I didn't even have that glass of wine that I was wanting all day.
We don't know what is happening with the dog yet, we always knew deep down that he couldn't come with us straight away. We would have found it very hard to get a hotel room with him, it would have been very difficult to sort out lots of the other arrangements if he had have come with us. This is pratical and it isn't like he doesn't know his Grandma and Grandad, he see's them all the time.
Will Harvey ever come out I just can't say right now, he has his pet passport so the option was always there. There is always something in the back of my head telling me that leaving him in England is the best we can do for him. That's our main priority, what's best for Harvey. Like I have said before he is eight, has fits every few months and has very very bad artheritis, so bad that he is limited to short walks and the vet says he only has 2 years left in his front joints. Putting it bluntly, going on an airplane is probally not the best idea, so that makes me feel guilty that to fly him to Edmonton would be puting my needs first and not the dogs.
So we fly out tomorrow, let me say that again. We fly out tomorrow. (Oh christ, Cassie starts to think are we doing the right thing)
Next entry will be when we are in Edmonton, thanks all for reading and we will see you on the other side when we get a lap top or Net book 
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